


team voltron texting

by dorkygabriel



Category: Voltron - Fandom, Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Crack, F/M, Group Chat Fic, M/M, basically theyre still in space but, biggest trash pile in all of ao3, but like.. in canon universe, canon divergence i guess you could say, hope u enjoy the ride, ish, literally its just crack, lol, memes. theyre all memes, oh my god it just gets worse as we go along, text fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-16
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2018-08-15 09:16:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 59
Words: 34,950
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8050735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dorkygabriel/pseuds/dorkygabriel
Summary: Allura decides a group chat might benefit the paladins. she'll probably regret that decision. (apparently my upload schedule is some point!! i tried to stick to one and it didnt work sorry im a mess :^) also this is a meme mess lol come join us in hell)





	1. group chat origins

**Author's Note:**

> dont ask me how group chats work in space i just wanted to join in on the group chat fic thing
> 
> this is my first contribution to the voltron fandom. i dont know whether to be proud or ashamed.

_Princess Allura created the group and added Lance, Keith, Shiro, Pidge, Hunk and Coran._

[3pm]

  
_Princess Allura_ : Paladins. Coran suggested that I make this.. Group chat for us to communicate when we're not, as you say, suited up.

  
_Lance:_ group chat!! nice!!

  
_Shiro:_ Lance, don't even think about abusing this.

_Lance changed his name to the best pilot._

_the best pilot changed Shiro's name to space dad_

  
_the best pilot:_ what was that shiro?

  
_Keith_ : Why did you call Shiro space dad?

  
_the best pilot:_ bc he _is_ the space dad.

  
_space dad:_ bc?

  
_Pidge:_ He means because. Also, group chat, finally!

  
_Keith:_ Is no one else going to question space dad? Really?

  
_Hunk:_ What did i miss?

  
_the best pilot:_ group chat. space dad. keith being confused.

  
_Hunk:_ sounds about right.

  
_Princess Allura:_ Paladins, we must not let this distract us. How much training have you done today?

  
_the best pilot:_ trainin right now, princess.

  
_Princess Allura:_ Lance, I can see you lying down.

  
_Princess Allura:_ Running away does not count as training.

  
_the best pilot_ : it totally counts.

  
_Keith:_ Okay, so no ones going to notice Lance's strange nicknames.

  
_the best pilot:_ aww, feeling left out?

  
_Keith:_ That's not what I said.

  
_Pidge:_ bad move, Keith.

_the best pilot changed Keith's name to mullet ninja._

  
_Hunk:_ good one, lance.

  
_mullet ninja:_ This doesn't even make sense.

  
_the best pilot:_ i only give accurate nicknames!

  
_mullet ninja:_ Well then why is yours 'the best pilot'?

  
_Pidge:_ OOOOH

  
_Hunk:_ OOOOOOOOH

  
_the best pilot:_ hunk!! ur supposed to be on my side!!

  
_the best pilot:_ and it is true! im great!

  
_the best pilot:_ guys. back me up.

_Pidge, Hunk, mullet ninja, space dad, Princess Allura and Coran have read this._

  
_the best pilot:_ GUYS.

  
_the best pilot:_ coran hasn't even been online until now!!

  
_the best pilot:_ ur the worst people ever. 

 


	2. not flirting.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> coran cant type. keith and lance arent flirting. space dad doesnt get text type.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i literally am uploading the second chapter like 5 mins after the first whoooooops. 
> 
> i realise im using earth time. no going back noW.

[7pm]

  
_Coran_ : hjkoew dio i dfop rthisf

  
_space dad:_ Coran, are you alright?

_Coran: xcabnt rtyope kweya rtoo asmajll_

  
_mullet ninja:_ Do you want us to come and find you? Are you in danger?

  
_Coran_ : njo!1 rthe kerys ae asmll

  
_the best pilot:_ oh now u guys come online.

  
_mullet ninja:_ We don't have time for your pity party right now Lance, Coran might be in danger.

  
_Pidge:_ He's saying 'how do I do this' 'cant type keys are too small' and 'no! the keys are small'

  
_Pidge:_ Seriously, how didn't you guys get that?

_the best pilot changed Pidge's name to hacker nerd._

  
_mullet ninja:_ Do you just have nicknames for everyone?

  
_the best pilot:_ ofc. not that any of u deserve them.

  
_space dad:_ ofc?

  
_hacker nerd:_ Of course.

  
_the best pilot:_ hacker nerd strikes again. also stop ignoring my pain and torment.

  
_mullet ninja:_ Lance, you're just a drama queen.

  
_the best pilot:_ says you, Bonding Moment™

  
_mullet ninja:_ Why do you only remember that when it helps you?

  
_the best pilot:_ aww ur just upset that im not fawning over ur heroic cradling me in ur arms!

  
_hacker nerd:_ can you guys flirt somewhere else please

  
_the best pilot:_ WERE NOT FLIRTING

  
_mullet ninja:_ WE'RE NOT FLIRTING

  
_Hunk:_ Looked like flirting to me.

  
_the best pilot:_ SERIOUSLY HUNK UR SUPPOSED TO BE ON MY SIDE. MY. SIDE. 

_the best pilot changed Hunk's name to traitor._

  
_the best pilot:_ did they just

  
_the best pilot:_ yep. they just said that then signed off.

  
_mullet ninja:_ Want to go kill them?

  
_the best pilot:_ lets go.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> boyfriends working together amiright ;) 
> 
> also what is formatting apparently. why does it hate me. why arent the line spacings equal. why why why.
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	3. Air lock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more klance because. klance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: oh ive wrote three chapters so i can upload them a few days apart  
> also me: so here have all three chapters today
> 
> 10/10 logic. 
> 
> enjoy!

[9pm]

  
_hacker nerd:_ klance.

  
_the best pilot:_ did u mean me??

  
_hacker nerd:_ nope. well, kind of. I meant klance.

  
_the best pilot:_ what??

  
_traitor:_ yours and keiths ship name. me and pidge came up with it after you guys locked us in the air lock and threatened to open it.

  
_mullet ninja:_ Ah, what a fond memory.

  
_the best pilot:_ that's true, keith, but whats a ship name?

  
_hacker nerd:_ what? _you_ don't know what a ship name is? Lance, I'm disappointed.

  
_hacker nerd:_ relationSHIP. you two. as a couple. ;)

  
_mullet ninja:_ This again?!

  
_the best pilot:_ don't make us lock you in the air lock again.

  
_mullet ninja:_ Don't tempt me, Lance.

  
_traitor:_ ;)

  
_the best pilot:_ STOP! what could possibly make u think of _us_ as a couple anyway?

  
_hacker nerd:_ oh come on. we  _all_ saw the Bonding Moment™.  

  
_hacker nerd changed the group chat name to Bonding Moment_ ™.

  
_mullet ninja:_ You're taking it out of proportion. I was helping my FRIEND after he was injured.

  
_traitor:_ your friend.. who's a boy?

  
_mullet ninja:_ Well. Of course.

  
_the best pilot:_ keith no

  
_traitor:_ KEITH JUST ADMITTED THAT LANCE IS HIS BOYFRIEND.

  
_hacker nerd:_ KLANCE!!

  
_space dad:_ You two are finally together? I'm happy for you guys.

  
_mullet ninja:_ THAT'S NOT WHAT I SAID.

  
_Princess Allura:_ What's all this talk about Lance and Keith?

  
_hacker nerd:_ They got together! Keith just told us!

  
_Princess Allura:_ That's sweet. But not surprising.

  
_the best pilot:_??????????

  
_Princess Allura:_ We all saw it coming, Lance.

  
_the best pilot:_ did you even scroll up??? we AREN'T together!!

  
_Princess Allura:_ Hunk said you were.

  
_mullet ninja:_ And we say we're not.

  
_hacker nerd:_ ooh, there's a 'we' now. ;)

  
_the best pilot:_ Air lock?

  
_mullet ninja:_ Air lock.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> maybe air lock will be our always ;) 
> 
> my favourite line in this whole thing is now 'keith no' 
> 
> comments and kudos will make me v haps <3


	4. space

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> space and klance. what more could you want?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 4am talks. klance. princess allura.

[4am]

  
_the best pilot:_ so were not from space

  
_hacker nerd:_ lance go to sleep

  
_the best pilot:_ but now were in space

  
_the best pilot:_ so. shouldn't this be a space group chat

  
_the best pilot:_ like shiro is space dad

  
_the best pilot:_ we drink space juice

  
_the best pilot:_ and eat space food

  
_the best pilot:_ and ride in space robot lions

  
_the best pilot:_ and form space voltron

  
_the best pilot:_ am I space lance??

_the best pilot changed his name to space lance._

  
_hacker nerd:_ if you don't go to sleep I will come to your room and knock you out.

  
_space lance:_ you mean _space_ knock me out

  
_hacker nerd:_ im on my way to your room.

  
_space lance:_ you mean my space room

[6 am]

  
_space lance:_ pidge actually knocked me out.

  
_mullet ninja:_  I would have done the same.

  
_space lance:_ wow is no one on my side

  
_space lance:_ anyway why are you up so early?

  
_mullet ninja:_ Why are you?

  
_space lance:_ well I wasn't even asleep i was UNCONSCIOUS.

  
_mullet ninja:_ How could I forget. Anyway, I like to train some mornings. You know, because that's a thing we should be doing.

  
_space lance:_ why would i need to train when im already awesome?

  
_mullet ninja:_ You go and defeat Zarkon with your 'awesomeness' then.

  
_space lance:_ maybe i will.

  
_Princess Allura:_ Your boyfriend is right, Lance. You should get in as much training as possible.

  
_space lance:_ hes NOT my boyfriend.

  
_mullet ninja:_ My name is Keith.

  
_Princess Allura:_ I know, I know. Pidge told me that would be fun to do. LOL.

  
_space lance:_ princess.. did you just use lol?

  
_Princess Allura:_ Yes! Pidge has been introducing me to text talk, too.  

  
_mullet ninja:_ This should be fun.

_space lance changed Princess Allura's name to princess pop culture._

  
_mullet ninja:_ Dammit.. That one is actually kind of funny.

  
_space lance:_ i always knew u loved me really ;)

  
_mullet ninja:_.... Lance.

  
_space lance:_ yes, my love??

  
_mullet ninja:_......

  
_space lance:_ oh.

  
_space lance:_ yeah i see my mistake now

  
_mullet ninja:_ At least Pidge and Hunk aren't online. They'd never let you live that down.

  
_hacker nerd:_ LANCE CALLED KEITH HIS LOVE

  
_hacker nerd:_ THEYRE TOTALLY TOGETHER

  
_space lance:_ keith u jinxed it

  
_space lance:_ AND I WAS JOKING. THATS WHAT I DO.

traitor: KLANCE IS REAL EVERYBODY

  
_space lance:_ KEITH BACK ME UP HERE

  
_mullet ninja:_ You got yourself into this one.

  
_space lance:_ mayBE BUT THEYRE STILL SAYING WE'RE A COUPLE. IF THERE'S ONE TIME TO BE ON MY SIDE ITS NOW.

  
_hacker nerd:_ yeah keith, back your boyfriend up!!

_mullet ninja left the chat._

  
_space lance:_ oh no he doesn't

  
_space lance:_ he doesn't get to leave me alone here

  
_traitor:_ feeling lost without your love by your side?

  
_space lance:_ hunk. bro. buddy. we need to have a talk abouT FRIENDSHIP.

_space lance added mullet ninja to the chat._

_traitor changed mullet ninja's name to lance's love._

  
_lance's love:_ This is why I wanted to leave.

  
_space dad:_ That's a cute nickname.

  
_lance's love:_ Really, Shiro? You too?

  
_space dad:_ We're all just showing our support for your relationship, Keith.

  
_space lance:_ WE DON'T HAVE A RELATIONSHIP.

  
_lance's love:_ And even if we did, we wouldn't tell you guys.

  
_space dad:_ Why not?

  
_hacker nerd:_ ;) ;) keith has thought about a relationship with lance and how they'd tell us ;) ;)

  
_traitor:_ that's pretty cute

  
_lance's love:_ This is exactly why.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> everyone wants them together as much as i do man 
> 
> keith is being really chill abt the prospect of a relationship with lance ;) ;)
> 
> i tried to not overload this chapter with klance as u can tell in the beginning but here we are. i promise ill do something other than klance next chapter lol 
> 
> comments and kudos will make me v has <3


	5. master plan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the paladins are good at working as a team

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i heard yall wanted more klance? 
> 
>  
> 
> also 600 hits and almost 100 kudos in like less than 3 days??? guys i love u

 

[1pm]

  
_hacker nerd:_ hey hunk

  
_traitor:_ yeah??

  
_hacker nerd:_ have you seen lance or keith all day?

  
_traitor:_ actually.... no I haven't

_hacker nerd:  exactly._

  
_space dad:_ Guys, why are you texting? You're sat across from each other.

  
_hacker nerd:_ and you're stood in the room.

  
_space dad:_ Touché.

  
_traitor:_ shiro, have you seen keith or lance today?

  
_space dad:_ No, why?

  
_traitor:_ ;)

  
_space dad:_???

  
_hacker nerd:_ we think they're probably together somewhere.

  
_hacker nerd:_ wanna go look for them?

  
_traitor:_ of course

  
_space dad:_ Shouldn't we respect their privacy?

  
_hacker nerd:_ They locked us in the air lock. Twice.

  
_space dad:_.....

  
_space dad:_ The castle is a big place. We'll have to spilt up.

  
_hacker nerd:_ YES SHIRO

  
_traitor:_ I can't believe hes on board.

[4pm]

  
_hacker nerd:_ anything guys??

  
_traitor:_ nothing here.

  
_space dad:_ The only places we haven't checked are their rooms and that _is_ a breach of their privacy.

  
_hacker nerd:_ wait... We've been putting this all on the group chat. Allura???

  
_princess pop culture:_ Yes?

  
_hacker nerd:_ Are Keith and Lance's lions still in their hangers?

  
_princess pop culture:_ Let me check.

  
_princess pop culture:_ Yes, they are. None of them have been taken out since... Three days ago?! Shouldn't you all have been training?

  
_space dad:_ We've been doing more physical training.

  
_princess pop culture:_ I believe you, Shiro. But you should train with your lions, too. Having a strong bond with them is vital.

  
_space dad:_ Of course, Princess.

  
_hacker nerd:_ nice save there

  
_space dad:_ I was telling the truth.

  
_hacker nerd:_ sure jan

  
_space dad:_ Jan???

  
_traitor:_ it's a meme

  
_space dad:_ meme???????

traitor: I'll explain later.

  
_hacker nerd:_ anyway, like I was saying..

  
_hacker nerd:_ we put this all on the group chat. that they can see.

  
_traitor:_ so.. you think they're tricking us?

  
_space lance:_ Clap. Clap. Clap.

  
_space lance:_ that would have a better effect in person

  
_space lance:_ ANYWAY

  
_lance's love:_ While you guys thought you had a master plan to catch us... Doing whatever your dirty minds thought we were, me and Lance have been moving around the castle and hiding from you.

  
_space lance:_ which totally proves that were the best.

  
_hacker nerd:_ okay, but... You did it together.

  
_traitor:_ WHICH MEANS OUR PLAN TOTALLY WORKED.

  
_lance's love:_ Don't go changing your plan now. We saw it all.

_hacker nerd sent a screenshot._

  
_hacker nerd:_ Actually... We've all been in on it. A plan to make you two spend all day together.

  
_space lance:_ YOU MADE A GROUP CHAT WITHOUT US?? AND EVEN SHIRO AND ALLURA WERE IN ON IT????

  
_traitor:_ Coran too, he just hates chatting in group chats.

_space lance started a chat with lance's love._

  
_space lance:_ two can play at this game.

  
_lance's love:_ How about we get them back?

  
_space lance:_ are you suggesting the air lock?

  
_lance's love:_ I'd love to... But I think we need to try something else.

  
_space lance:_ im listening.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;) ;) ;) 
> 
> comments and kudos will make me v haps <3


	6. announcement

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did i write the end of last chapter without an actual idea in mind? yes.  
> do i regret that? yes.  
> is this awful? yes but its a crack fic anyway so i hope u didnt have high hopes lol

[9am]

  
_hacker nerd:_ keith and lance didn't talk on the chat at all last night

  
_traitor:_ ;)

  
_hacker nerd:_ as much as I wish it was that

  
_hacker nerd:_ im worried they're mad at us

  
_space lance:_ im not mad

  
_space lance:_ keith?

  
_lance's love:_ Nah, I'm not mad. It was a harmless prank.

  
_space dad:_ I'm glad you both saw the funny side.

  
_space lance:_ anyway, we'd like to tell you all something

  
_hacker nerd:_ YEAH

  
_traitor:_ OH MY GOD YEAH

  
_lance's love:_ Lance and I...

  
_hacker nerd:_ YESYESYES

  
_traitor:_ HERE WE GO

  
_princess pop culture:_ What is it, Keith?

  
_space dad:_ You can tell us anything, we're your teammates.

  
_Coran:_ I fhearsd rtherde qwaas bnrws

 

[9:30am]

  
_hacker nerd:_ guys???

  
_space lance:_ sorry. keith got nervous.

  
_hacker nerd:_ AHHHHHHHH

  
_space lance:_ as he was saying....

  
_space lance:_ me and keith

  
_traitor:_ SPIT IT OUT LANCE

 

[10:30am]

  
_traitor:_ we should just go and ask them in person.

  
_space dad:_ No. If this is how they want to tell us, we should respect that.

  
_hacker nerd:_ but shiroooooo it's been over an hour!!

  
_princess pop culture:_ I agree with Shiro. Lance said Keith was nervous, we should give them time.

 

[11am]

  
_space lance:_ were back.

  
_hacker nerd:_ AND WE'RE READY

  
_traitor:_ COME ON GUYS

  
_space lance:_ so.

  
_space lance:_ me and keith...

  
_hacker nerd:_ YOUVE SAID THAT PART ALREADY

  
_space lance:_ wanted to tell you....

  
_traitor:_ HERE IT COMES

  
_hacker nerd:_.... does anyone else hear laughing coming from keiths room

  
_traitor:_....yes.

  
_space lance:_ THAT WE CAN PRANK YOU GUYS TOO.

_hacker nerd has left the group chat._

_traitor has left the group chat._

_princess pop culture has left the group chat._

_space dad has left the group chat._

_Coran has left the group chat._

  
_space lance:_ oh and we're totally together.

  
_lance's love:_ Lance. They all left the chat.

_space lance: exactly._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I SAY CANON YOU SAY KLANCE   
>  CANON 
> 
>  
> 
> as usual, comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	7. #klance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> klance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha remember when i said id do something other than klance? yeah apparently that was a huge lie. also what even is characterisation whoops

  
_lance's love:_ So, how long do you think we can keep this up?

  
_space lance:_ with these guys?? as long as we want

  
_lance's love:_ You know, they'll probably hate us when they find out.

  
_space lance:_ they love us too much for that

  
_lance's love:_ I guess you have a point.

  
_space lance:_ aww, you're so sweet to me <3

  
_space lance:_ anyway. lets add them back

_space lance added hacker nerd, traitor, space dad, princess pop culture and Coran to the chat._

  
_space lance:_ cmon guys that was funny!!

  
_hacker nerd:_ yoU PLAYED WITH MY EMOTIONS

  
_hacker nerd:_ THE BETRAYAL IS REAL LANCE

  
_hacker nerd:_ THE BETRAYAL IS REALLLLLLLL

  
_lance's love:_ Pidge, you're being melodramatic.

  
_hacker nerd:_ AND YOU'RE TOYING WITH MY HEART, KEITH.

  
_space lance:_ calm down pidge

  
_traitor:_ YOU GUYS ARE THE WORST PRANKSTERS

  
_traitor:_ THAT WAS JUST PAINFUL

  
_lance's love:_ Of course. Can you guys never attack us alone?

  
_traitor:_ you two team up. so do we.

  
_space lance:_ um

  
_space lance:_ when did we say we were a team

  
_hacker nerd:_ #klance

  
_lance's love:_ You're never going to stop with that, are you?

  
_hacker nerd:_ Keith.

  
_lance's love:_ Yes?

  
_hacker nerd:_ your name is still lance's love. neither you or lance have changed it.

  
_hacker nerd:_ #klance

  
_lance's love:_ Lance, you can take this one.

  
_space lance:_ im good tbh

  
_hacker nerd:_............

  
_traitor:_..........................

  
_traitor:_ oh my god

  
_traitor:_ neither of them want to change it

  
_traitor:_ thEY LIKE IT

  
_hacker nerd:_ #KLANCE

_traitor changed space lance's name to literally in love with keith_

  
_literally in love with keith:_ really

  
_literally in love with keith:_ like. really

  
_lance's love:_ Won't this be confusing? My name has Lance in it, and Lance's has Keith in it.

  
_hacker nerd:_......

  
_hacker nerd:_ and _that's_ your only issue with it

  
_hacker nerd:_ did I hear someone say

  
_hacker nerd:_ #KLANCE

  
_literally in love with keith:_ maybe if we just say it they'll stop

  
_lance's love:_ Ha. More like keep going.

  
_traitor:_ SAY WHAT

  
_hacker nerd:_ this better not be another prank

  
_lance's love:_ We were going to wait it out a while longer, but I guess now is as good of a time as any.

  
_traitor:_ WHAT

_lance's love sent a photo._

_hacker nerd sent a voice message._

  
_literally in love with keith:_ pidge. thats 2 minutes of you screaming yeah boy. we sent the image one minute ago.

  
_hacker nerd:_ ITS MY LONGEST YEAH BOY EVER

  
_traitor:_ AM I SEEING WHAT I THINK IM SEEING

  
_traitor:_ IS THAT

  
_traitor:_ A PICTURE

  
_traitor:_ OF YOU AND LANCE

  
_traitor:_ KISSING?????????

  
_literally in love with keith:_ I think so?

  
_lance's love:_ I'm pretty certain it is.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ is that

  
_literally in love with keith:_ pidge screaming I hear

  
_hacker nerd:_ YES

  
_hacker nerd:_ #KLANCE IS REAL

  
_space dad:_ That's a very cute picture. I'm happy for you guys.

  
_lance's love:_ Thanks, Shiro.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ see. that's a normal reaction, pidge.

  
_hacker nerd:_ CANT HEAR YOU

  
_hacker nerd:_ TOO BUSY SCREAMING OVER KLANCE

  
_literally in love with keith:_ theres nothing to hear?????? im typing????

  
_traitor:_ okay I do have one question

  
_traitor:_ when did you take that photo?

  
_lance's love:_ Just before we sent it.

  
_traitor:_ so that means

  
_traitor:_ pidge u might wanna get back here for this

  
_traitor:_ you two are sat together right now. on one of your beds.

  
_hacker nerd:_ AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

  
_literally in love with keith:_ well

  
_literally in love with keith:_ maybe.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pidge is me tbh
> 
> this fic aka how many memes can i get in 
> 
> this is trash. why does anyone read it
> 
> as usual, comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	8. a top secret government spy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> can anyone be trusted?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 3 chapters in two days. don't say i dont love you guys. 
> 
> this is ridiculous tho oh my god

  
_literally in love with keith:_ pidge.

  
_hacker:_ mmmyes?

  
_literally in love with keith:_ can you please explain to me why when I walked into the lounge area the picture of me and keith was literally stuck all over the walls

  
_hacker nerd:_ well

  
_hacker nerd:_ you see

  
_hacker nerd:_ I don't have a good reason I was excited

  
_literally in love with keith:_ hoW DID YOU EVEN GET A PRINTER

  
_literally in love with keith:_ WERE LITERALLY IN SPACE. WHERE IN THIS CASTLE IS THERE A PRINTER

  
_literally in love with keith:_ IM PRETTY SURE THAT ALTEA WAS ADVANCED ENOUGH THAT THEY DIDNT NEED PRINTERS

  
_literally in love with keith:_ ARUS TOO

  
_hacker nerd:_ I have my ways.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ honestly how were u never arrested for ur hacking skills on earth

  
_literally in love with keith:_ or at least hired by the government as a spy

  
_literally in love with keith:_.........

  
_literally in love with keith:_ pidge are u a top secret government spy

  
_hacker nerd:_ yes.

_hacker nerd has left the group chat_

  
_literally in love with keith:_........ they were joking right

  
_literally in love with keith:_ right?!

  
_lance's love:_ Obviously. Would a top secret government spy admit that?

  
_literally in love with keith:_..... that sounds like something someone who is defending a top secret government spy would say

  
_lance's love:_ Oh, am I a top secret government spy now too?

  
_literally in love with keith:_ maybe you are. I don't know that.

  
_lance's love:_ Lance, I promise that I'm not a top secret government spy.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ again

  
_literally in love with keith:_ that sounds like something a top secret government spy would say

  
_lance's love:_ For the last time, I'm not a top secret government spy.

  
_lance's love:_ Also, can we stop saying 'a top secret government spy'? It's so tedious.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ changing the subject now are we

  
_traitor:_ sounds like something a top secret government spy would say

  
_literally in love with keith:_ FINALLY HUNK

  
_literally in love with keith:_ THATS FRIENDSHIP. THANK YOU.

  
_lance's love:_  Teaming up to try and prove that his boyfriend is a top secret government spy - Lance's definition of friendship, everyone.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ u know u love me really

  
_literally in love with keith:_ UNLESS UR A TOP SECRET GOVERNMENT SPY WHO'S FORMED A RELATIONSHIP WITH ME TO TRY AND GET ALL OF MY SECRETS

  
_lance's love:_ Oh my god. You're ridiculous. Shiro? Allura? Coran? Anyone want to help me out here?

  
_space dad:_ You chose to date him. You signed up for this.

  
_lance's love:_ Thanks for the support.

  
_princess pop culture:_ I know a lot about you paladins. So, Lance, I can assure you that Keith is not a top secret government spy.

  
_lance's love:_ Thank you, Allura.

  
_literally in love with keith:_........

  
_lance's love:_ Convinced now?

  
_literally in love with keith:_ unlesS ALLURA IS ALSO A TOP SECRET GOVERNMENT SPY WHO IS JUST COVERING FOR YOU.

_lance's love has left the group chat._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if there were bloopers, it would be how many times i managed to misspell government in this chapter. like wow. 
> 
> alsO finally a chapter not completely centered around klance!! tho its still there bc im trash who just loves those space gays 
> 
> as usual, comments and kudos make me very happy <3


	9. Operation space parents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ive given up with summaries and timestamps apparently

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHY IS WRITING SHIRO AND ALLURA SO HARD BY E
> 
> probs bc i type like how i write lance/pidge/hunk so theyre easier to write for me idk 
> 
> anywaY my friend (superwhotrashlock123) wanted some space parents action so here ya go (kinda. most of it comes next chapter)
> 
> (P.S 200 KUDOS??? THATS SO. WOW I LOVE U ALL IVE NEVER HAD THIS MANY)

 

_literally in love with keith added lance's love to the group chat._

_literally in love with keith:_ love me love me

_literally in love with keith:_ say that u love me

_literally in love with keith:_ fool me fool me

_lance's love:_ Lance. What are you doing?

_literally in love with keith:_ well I was TRYING to serenade u

_literally in love with keith:_ u know so ud forgive me for thinking u were a top secret government spy

_literally in love with keith:_ but u RUINED it smh keith

_lance's love:_ You're so sweet.

_literally in love with keith:_ I know right??

_hacker nerd:_ guys flirt privately ew

_literally in love with keith:_ pidge u Left the chat how are u here

_hacker nerd:_ ;)

_literally in love with keith:_ okay even if keith isn't a top secret government spy, pidge definitely is.

_princess pop culture:_ Paladins. Aren't you forgetting something?

_literally in love with keith:_ no?

_space dad:_ Training.

_princess pop culture:_ Thank you, Shiro. At least I can rely on one of you.

_literally in love with keith:_ you wound me, princess </3

_princess pop culture:_ Lance.

_literally in love with keith:_ yeah yeah, im on my way 

 

_space dad:_ That was a successful training session, well done guys.

_space dad:_ And, thanks Allura for helping us with it.

_princess pop culture:_ You're very welcome, Shiro. You did well. Quite well.

_space dad:_ Maybe you and I should discuss some other training exercises? To get us prepared for any kind of attack Zarkon could throw at us.

_princess pop culture:_ That sounds like a good idea! We could go through some together later.

_space dad:_ I'd love that.

_hacker nerd:_ yeah hi we exist.

_princess pop culture:_ What do you mean, Pidge? Of course you exist.

_hacker nerd:_ nevermind, princess. nevermind. 

 

_hacker nerd created a new chat and added lance's love, literally in love with keith and traitor._

_hacker nerd:_ guys

_lance's love:_ I am going to lose track of all of these chats.

_hacker nerd:_ yeah yeah but I cant talk about this on the other chat so its necessary

_literally in love with keith:_ what is it?

_hacker nerd:_ okay so when we got back from training today

_hacker nerd:_ did anyone else notice how Flirty allura and shiro were

_hacker nerd:_ well. flirty in their own, strange way

_traitor:_ YES

_lance's love:_ Do you two just love playing cupid?

_traitor:_ also yes

_hacker nerd:_ well it worked with you and lance didn't it?

_lance's love:_ Touché.

_hacker nerd:_ yeah exactly

_hacker nerd:_ so

_hacker nerd named the group chat operation space parents_

_literally in love with keith:_ I knew u liked the space thing

_hacker nerd:_ don't make me knock u out again

_literally in love with keith:_ don't make me throw u in the air lock again

_traitor:_ chill out guys

_traitor:_ so whats the plan to get space parents together?

_literally in love with keith:_ SEE its catching on, im totally trademarking it

_hacker nerd:_ well they are never on the chat so the #klance plan wont work with them

_traitor:_ and if we used that plan theyd be suspicious

_hacker nerd:_ tru

_hacker nerd:_ so

_hacker nerd:_ im thinking maybe if we can get coran in on this that a castle 'malfunction' happens and they get locked in the same room together

_lance's love:_ But how would you get them in the same room in the first place?

_hacker nerd:_ that is where we're enlisting u two

_hacker nerd:_ so theyd be too suspicious if me n hunk tried anything since were known matchmakers now

_lance's love:_ You pressured one couple. One. And besides, we got together by ourselves.

_hacker nerd:_ yeah anyway

_hacker nerd:_ me n hunk will speak to coran. keith, u get shiro to the room, lance u get allura. as soon as theyre in there u fake some coupley excuse to leave n then the malfunction can happen. we all have to pretend that weve been affected by it too. theyd only believe something believable so.. be believable.

_lance's love:_ Will this really work?

_traitor:_ belieVE IN THE LOVE KEITH

_literally in love with keith:_ I think it could work. lets give it a shot

_lance's love:_.... Fine.

_hacker nerd:_ OPERATION SPACE PARENTS IS AGO.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woO for more plans !! also this chapters blooper is that i kept mistyping 'literally in love with keith' so like a lot of the times it was 'literally in love with lance' which tbh would work too also one was 'literally in love with training' like yeah Right lol 
> 
> as usual, comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	10. Operation space parents is ago!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the title says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im not dead! i haven't abandoned this! im sorry its been almost a month, but school is draining alllll of my creativity. And when I finally wrote some, the program i use decided to mess up and (even though i make sure i save like 50 times!!) delete half of what i wrote. but finally, here is a new chapter! Hope you enjoy!

  
_hacker nerd:_ everybody ready?

  
_traitor:_ READY.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ SO READY.

  
_lance's love:_ Yeah, I guess.

  
_hacker nerd:_ LANCE AND HUNK, THAT'S THE SPIRIT.

  
_hacker nerd:_  KEITH.... WORK ON YOUR ENTHUSIASM.

  
_hacker nerd:_ OPERATION SPACE PARENTS IS A GO!

  
_lance's love:_ You said that already.

  
_hacker nerd:_.....

  
_hacker nerd:_ OPERATION SPACE PARENTS IS A GO!!!

 

 

  
_literally in love with keith:_ keith. im with allura. are you with shiro?

  
_lance's love:_ yeah. hes talking to me. cant be onh ere.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ wow you typed in lower case AND made a typo. you must be typing without looking or something.

  
_lance's love:_ yeah. now shut up and get allura to the lounge room.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ alright alright

 

 

  
_hacker nerd:_ Coran is on board.

  
_traitor:_ turns out he loves matchmaking just as much as we do.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ allura is in the room.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ she wants to know why I brought her here. cant stall much longer. hurry up keith.

  
_lance's love:_ coming in now

 

  
_literally in love with keith:_ WE LEFT

  
_literally in love with keith:_ YOU HAVE LIKE A MINUTE BEFORE THEY GET SUSPICOUS AND LEAVE

  
_hacker nerd:_ OKAY OKAY WE'VE GOT THIS

  
_traitor:_ LOCKDOWN IN THREE

  
_traitor:_ TWO

  
_traitor:_ ONE

  
_traitor:_ BOOM.

  
_hacker nerd:_ Nice work, team.

  
_lance's love:_ Nice work getting them in the same room, sure. It still might not work.

  
_hacker nerd:_ COUGHKLANCECOUGH

  
_lance's love:_.... Shut up.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ theyre messaging the main chat. we should go over there if we don't wanna seem suspicious.

 

[Bonding Moment™]

 

  
_princess pop culture:_ Paladins, there seems to have been a lock down put into place in the castle.

  
_princess pop culture:_ Myself and Shiro are stuck in the lounge room, so we cannot be of any help. If there is an issue with the castle, we are trusting you to solve it. We'll look for a way out now.

  
_hacker nerd:_ PRINCESS NO

  
_princess pop culture:_ Excuse me, Pidge?

  
_hacker nerd:_ uhhhh

  
_hacker nerd:_ me and hunk were with coran when the lockdown happened. we just looked into it, its... just a malfunction.

  
_lance's love:_ Lance and I are stuck in the control room. I guess we'll all just have to stay put until Coran, Pidge and Hunk can get the castle back to normal.

  
_traitor:_ that's a good idea.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ yeah. trying to find ways out might just damage the castle more..

space dad: Alright. Hang tight, guys.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ you too, shiro ;)

  
_space dad:_???

  
_lance's love:_ Ignore him. He had too much space juice.

 

  
_[_ operation space parents _]_  


 

  
_hacker nerd:_ WAY TO BE SUBTLE, LANCE.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ ITS SHIRO AND ALLURA. THEY WONT GET IT.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ BESIDES, YOU WERE HARDLY SUBTLE WITH YOUR 'PRINCESS NO'

  
_lance's love:_ Guys, calm down.

traitor: keith's right. if you don't calm down, you'll end up fighting in the main chat and give away the plan.

  
_hacker nerd:_ yeah I guess.

  
_hacker nerd:_ truce, lance?

  
_hacker nerd:_.... Lance.

  
_lance's love:_ He's... Wandering around the room.

  
_hacker nerd:_ he could at least look at the chat.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ keith, come over here.

  
_lance's love:_ You couldn't have said that?

  
_literally in love with keith:_ just showing pidge that im looking at the chat :)

  
_hacker nerd:_ do yoU WANT TO FIGHT ME LANCE

  
_hacker nerd:_ RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW LETS GO

  
_literally in love with keith:_ we're in different rooms, pidge.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ anyway. I've just figured out that we're in the control room, we can see Allura and Shiro if you guys can power it up for us.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ pidge?

  
_traitor:_ they're grumbling about not wanting to do it for you, that they're doing it for keith.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ wow okay

  
_traitor:_ yeah. it should be done.... Now! Is it powered up?

  
_lance's love:_ Yeah, we're on.

  
_lance's love:_ They look so... Awkward.

  
_lance's love:_ We should probably check the main chat.

 

[Bonding Moment™]

 

  
_space dad:_ How's everybody holding up?

  
_lance's love:_ We're good, apart from Lance complaining that he's bored.

  
_space dad:_ The usual, then.

  
_lance's love:_ Yeah.

  
_space dad:_ What about you guys, Hunk, Pidge? How are you and Coran?

  
_traitor:_ We're doing okay. Pidge and Coran are still working on the malfunction.

  
_space dad:_ Alright, keep it up, guys.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ how are you and allura?

  
_space dad:_ We're alright, but Allura is a bit stressed about the fact that she can't do anything.

  
_lance's love:_ I'm sure you'll be able to keep her calm, Shiro.

  
_space dad:_ I'll try.

 

[operation space parents]

 

  
_literally in love with keith:_ GUUUUUYS

  
_literally in love with keith:_ I THINK SHIRO LISTENED TO KEITH. HES MOVING CLOSER TO ALLURA.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ HE PUT HIS HAND ON HER SHOULDER.

  
_hacker nerd:_ SPACE PARENTS!!

  
_literally in love with keith:_ oh now you don't want to fight?

  
_hacker nerd:_ SHUT UP LANCE, SPACE PARENTS IS HAPPENING.

  
_hacker nerd:_ TELL ME MORE.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ they sat down. I think theyre talking.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ oh my god

  
_hacker nerd:_ WHAT

  
_literally in love with keith:_ oh. my. god.

  
_hacker nerd:_ GODDAMMIT, LANCE. WHAT IS HAPPENING.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ oh mY GOD

  
_lance's love:_ They're hugging.

  
_hacker nerd:_ thank you keith.

  
_hacker nerd:_ ahem

  
_hacker nerd:_ SPACE PARENTS!

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> space parents ;) ;) 
> 
> as per usual, comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	11. A mess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> as the title says

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dkfshjffsjskjd idek. enjoy.

  
_hacker nerd:_ any updates for us klance???

  
_literally in love with keith:_ we're different people you know

  
_hacker nerd:_ easier to refer to you as klance

  
_hacker nerd:_ so, updates?

  
_lance's love:_ After the hug, they talked for a while. Still are.

  
_lance's love:_ Wait.

  
_hacker nerd:_ WHAT

  
_hacker nerd:_ KEITH DONT YOU DARE GO MIA ON ME

  
_hacker nerd:_ KEITH

  
_lance's love:_ Allura is resting her head on Shiro's shoulder.

  
_hacker nerd:_ AWWWWWWW

  
_traitor:_ THAT'S ADORABLE.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ oh hey hunk

  
_traitor:_ hey lance

  
_literally in love with keith:_ I just realised ur name is still traitor

  
_traitor:_ wow

  
_traitor:_ rude

  
_literally in love with keith:_ yeah yeah hold up ill change it

  
_literally in love with keith:_ hmmm...

_literally in love with keith changed traitor's name to hunk of love_

  
_hunk of love:_ that's sweet

  
_lance's love:_ I don't get it.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ we haven't been away from earth for that long

  
_literally in love with keith:_ its a pun??

  
_lance's love:_???

  
_literally in love with keith:_ the Elvis song 'a big hunk o'love'... his name is hunk...

  
_lance's love:_ Elvis??

  
_literally in love with keith:_ keith are u even human

  
_literally in love with keith:_ you don't know Elvis???

  
_literally in love with keith:_ we're gonna have to break up

  
_lance's love:_ We... Are?

  
_literally in love with keith:_ oh my god you're clueless

  
_literally in love with keith:_ no, we're not breaking up

  
_literally in love with keith:_ its a joke

  
_literally in love with keith:_ do u know any pop culture

  
_literally in love with keith:_ at all

_literally in love with keith changed lance's love's name to clueless_

  
_cluessless:_ Lance. I was an orphan. Then I was in the Garrison. Then I lived in a literal shack and spent everyday and every night finding things out about YOUR strange lion. I didn't have time for pop culture.

  
_literally in love with keith:_...... well

  
_literally in love with keith:_ guess we should check on shallura haha

  
_hacker nerd:_ did you just say shallura

  
_hacker nerd:_ what happened to 'we're different people you know'

  
_literally in love with keith:_ so anyway

  
_literally in love with keith:_ we cant stay in these rooms over night

  
_literally in love with keith:_ when are we ending the malfunction

  
_hacker nerd:_ give them a few more ticks. theyre getting somewhere.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ okay okay ill go check

  
_literally in love with keith:_ clueless over there looks like he's seen a ghost hold up

  
_literally in love with keith:_ oh. my. god.

  
_hacker nerd:_ WHAT

  
_literally in love with keith:_ THEY'RE KISSING

  
_hunk of love:_ WHAT

  
_hunk of love:_ FOR REAL????

  
_literally in love with keith:_ YES FOR REAL

[Bonding Moment™]

  
_literally in love with keith:_ SHRIO AND ALLURA SITTIN IN A TREE

  
_literally in love with keith:_ K I S S I N G

  
_literally in love with keith:_ FIRST COMES LOVE

  
_space dad:_ Lance.

  
_clueless:_ Well, I guess the plan's over.

  
_space dad:_ Plan?

  
_hacker nerd:_ :)

  
_hunk of love:_ keith and lance lured you two into a room and coran, pidge and I faked a malfunction to get you two closer. seemed to have worked.

  
_space dad:_ But how do you know...?

  
_literally in love with keith:_ keith and I are in the control room. pidge powered it up so we could see you.

  
_princess pop culture:_ So you lied to us, trapped us in a room and spied on us?

  
_hacker nerd:_ uhh....

  
_hacker nerd:_ hunk wanna take this one?

  
_hunk of love:_ We did it.... For love?

  
_hunk of love:_ And you seemed fine when we did this to Keith and Lance.

  
_space dad:_ That... Is true.

  
_princess pop culture:_ Fine... I'll let you all of. Only because working as a team is good for the good of Voltron.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ and because you looove shiro ;)

  
_space dad:_ Lance.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ my cue to go?

  
_space dad:_ Yep.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ hasta la later!

  
_princess pop culture:_ Pidge, can you fix the castle now?

  
_hacker nerd:_ on it, princess.

  
_hacker nerd:_ done.

  
_princess pop culture:_ That was... Fast.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ I didn't call them hacker nerd for nothing!

  
_space dad:_ LANCE.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ uhhh... that was keith?

  
_literally in love with keith:_ SHIRO NO

  
_literally in love with keith:_ UR FASTER THAN ME THIS ISNT FAIR

  
_literally in love with keith:_ ALLURA TELL YOUR BOYFRIEND TO STOP CHASING ME

  
_literally in love with keith:_..... AND TELL MY BOYFRIEND TO STOP LAUGHING

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have some klance ideas for next chapter ;))
> 
> but not much else. i usually just write whatever comes to mind but if you guys have anything you'd like to see in this feel free to let me know!! ill def use it n ofc, credit you
> 
> also i feel like u should know: where lance says 'at all' i was typing probably subconsciously as i usually end up doing when ideas are flowing, i somehow wrote 'fight me' instead?? i have no memory of doing it, im laughing. im way too used to saying 'fight me' all the time.
> 
> as per usual, comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	12. Can't help falling in love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i cant believe that this trashy fic is almost at 400 kudos. that is so overwhelming omg, thank u all, ur gr8 <3333
> 
> also 
> 
> this chapter's kinda short, but also a lil different. hope u enjoy~

[literally in love with keith started a chat with hacker nerd]

 

_literally in love with keith_ : pidge

  
_literally in love with keith:_ I need u to do something for me

  
_hacker nerd:_ no

  
_literally in love with keith:_ it involves klance

  
_hacker nerd:_...

  
_hacker nerd:_ im listening

 

[Bonding Moment™]

  
_literally in love with keith:_ hey keith can u come to my room real quick

  
_clueless:_ Okay?

  
_literally in love with keith:_ nice

 

When Keith arrived at Lance's room, he admittedly found Lance's grin concerning, and paused in the doorway.

"Should I... Be worried?" He asked with a raised brow.

"Nope, nothing to worry about. Come in!"

Lance jumped up from his bed, and hurried to Keith's side, placing a hand on his back. He gently pushed him into the room and closed the door behind them. Keith's facial expressions just became even more confused as Lance turned around to do something that looked suspiciously like typing. After a second, he pivoted back around to face Keith.

"Lance.. What's going on?"

Before Lance could answer, music began to play, and Keith furrowed his brows. Taking in a deep breath, Lance smiled softly and stepped close to Keith, wrapping his arms around his waist. Keith just stared at him, which made Lance laugh, slightly nervously.

"Just follow my lead, Keith." Lance supplied, so Keith gave a small nod and wrapped his hands around Lance's neck.

 " _Wise men say, only fools rush in"_ The music began and of course, Keith didn't recognise the singer.

"I told you, you need to be educated on Elvis. This is one of his songs." Lance spoke quietly, beginning to take slow steps side to side, Keith doing the same.

"I.. Get why you like him so much." He gave a small smile, and after a second, rested his head on Lance's shoulder as they gently swayed to the music.

They were content to dance in silence, Lance resting his head on Keith's, pink brushing his cheeks. However, as the song progressed, Lance lifted his head and the movement caused Keith to move his head to look up at Lance.

" _For I can't help, falling in love with you"_   As Elvis' voice filled the room, Lance slowly leaned in close to press his lips against Keith's.

After the initial shock, Keith melted into the kiss, his eyes fluttering closed. The song ended, but neither of them cared, happily lost in each other's embrace. Until the chat room was exploding with notifications. Lance reluctantly pulled away, chuckling quietly.

"We should tell them to work on their timing."

 

[Bonding Moment ]

 

  
_hacker nerd:_ THAT WAS THE CUTEST THIGN

  
_hacker nerd:_ YOU GUYS ARE THE CUTEST

  
_hacker nerd:_ IM SCREAMINFG

  
_clueless:_ You were watching us????

  
_hacker nerd:_ we All were. Lance asked me to set up the music. obviously I was going to set up a camera too.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ PIDGE

  
_literally in love with keith:_ THAT WAS A PRIVATE MOMENT

  
_space dad:_ But mine and Allura's kiss wasn't?

  
_literally in love with keith:_ THAT'S... DIFFERENT.

  
_princess pop culture:_ You paladins really need to learn the meaning of privacy.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ MATCH MAKING IS DIFFERENT TO AN ESTABLISHED COUPLE'S FIRST KISS, GUYS.

  
_princess pop culture:_ Maybe you should all just call a truce and promise to not spy on each other again.

  
_clueless:_ I'm with Allura. Truce.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ Truce. Pidge, Hunk, Shiro??

  
_space dad:_ Truce.

  
_hunk of love:_ Truce.

  
_hacker nerd:_....

  
_space dad:_ Pidge.

  
_hacker nerd:_ fineeeee

  
_hacker nerd:_ truce!

  
_princess pop culture:_ Thank you. But, really, Keith and Lance, you two are very suited to each other.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ ALLURA

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;) ;) ;) ;)
> 
> what did u guys think abt the lil scene?? i wanted to include it n thought that the only way to do it justice was to just write it out. ive never really written anything proper for voltron before (thats a lie, i have like 3 things in my notes but ive never Uploaded any) so im worried that i just butchered their characters shfshj. Any feedback would be hella appreciated, but also, would u like more of that?? or do u think just texting is a better option? im open to ideas!!
> 
> As usual, comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	13. A bigger mess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> remember when they were at least slightly in character??? yeah me neither
> 
> also pidge is done with klance??? who knew this day would come

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> listen im sorry  
> its midnight  
> i have not slept much this week  
> ive been too busy crying over a certain headcanon (and playing mystic messenger ayyy). ull see.  
> i had plans for a slightly serious chapter but nope ur getting this instead.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ damn

  
_literally in love with keith:_ did yall also notice how Good keith looked in training today

  
_literally in love with keith:_ or was that just me

  
_hacker nerd:_ just you

  
_hunk of love:_ just you

  
_princess pop culture:_ Just you.

  
_space dad:_ Just you.

  
_Coran:_ sjusrt tyoiu

  
_clueless:_????

  
_clueless:_ Thanks, guys. Great confidence boost.

  
_hacker nerd:_ nah bro. ur good looking

  
_hacker nerd:_ we just don't like u like lance likes u

  
_hacker nerd:_ lance is keith stan #1

  
_space dad:_ Stan? Keith's last name isn't Stan, Pidge.

  
_princess pop culture:_ You should know your teammates last name.

  
_hacker nerd:_ guys no

  
_hacker nerd:_ 'stan' is like.... a really big fan.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ I do stan keith

  
_literally in love with keith:_ who doesnt?

  
_hacker nerd:_ I dont

  
_hunk of love:_ neither

  
_space dad:_ Sorry, Keith. I don't.

  
_princess pop culture:_ I'm afraid I can't say I 'stan' you, either. Sorry.

  
_Coran:_ bnoper

  
_clueless:_ Why do you all hate me??

  
_clueless:_ It's because I'm half Galra isn't it.

  
_hacker nerd:_ what

  
_clueless:_ what

  
_space dad:_ Keith, what did you just say?

  
_clueless:_  i don't recall saying anything, Shiro.

  
_space dad:_ Well then what did you type?

  
_clueless:_ uhhhh

  
_clueless:_ nope don't remember typing anything either.

  
_hunk of love:_ youre spending too much time with lance

  
_hunk of love:_ hes rubbing off on you

  
_literally in love with keith:_ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

  
_space dad:_ LANCE.

  
_literally in love with keith:_ anyway

  
_literally in love with keith:_ dont worry keith, ill always stan you <333

  
_clueless:_ Thank you, Lance.

 

_[hacker nerd changed literally in love with keith's nickname to keith stan]_

 

  
_keith stan:_ speaking of nicknames

  
_keith stan:_ hes never on

  
_keith stan:_ but its time we give coran a nickname

 

_[keith stan changed Coran's nickname to cool uncle]_

 

  
_hacker nerd:_ i mean

  
_hacker nerd:_ true

  
_keith stan:_ exactly

  
_princess pop culture:_ I'm not sure I'll ever understand you paladins.

  
_space dad:_ Me either. And I'm one of them.

  
_princess pop culture:_ That's why you're my favourite.

  
_hacker nerd:_ WOW

  
_hunk of love:_ I'M OFFENDED???

  
_keith stan:_ uncalled for, princess. uncalled for.

  
_clueless:_ STOP DISCRIMINATING AGAINST ME BECAUSE I'M PART GALRA.

  
_hacker nerd:_ okay no that was in caps

  
_hacker nerd:_ we all saw that

  
_clueless:_ all saw what??

  
_hacker nerd:_ u type in all lower case when ur tryna be slick keith

  
_hacker nerd:_ aliens are weird

  
_clueless:_ uhm? don't call Coran and Allura weird because they're Altean?? that's just rude.

  
_hacker nerd:_ fine. galra are weird.

  
_clueless:_ just because Shiro has a Galra arm it doesn't make him an alien, Pidge. don't be so judgemental.

  
_hacker nerd:_ I GIVE UP

  
_clueless:_ give up with what?

  
_hacker nerd:_ DON'T MAKE ME FIGHT YOU KEITH

  
_keith stan:_ lol u could never beat keith in a fight

  
_keith stan:_ have you seen him??? damn

  
_hacker nerd:_ listen. lance.

  
_hacker nerd:_ were supportive of your relationship.

  
_hacker nerd:_ but ur only coming here to fliRT

  
_hacker nerd:_ you two are the weirdest.

  
_hacker nerd:_ i regret match making you.

  
_hunk of love:_ agreed.

  
_space dad:_ Agreed.

  
_princess pop culture:_ Agreed.

  
_cool uncle:_ asgrwefd

  
_clueless:_ Wow.

  
_clueless:_ Is this beca

  
_hacker nerd:_ LET ME STOP YOU THERE KEITH

  
_hacker nerd:_ WE GET IT, YOU'RE GALRA.

  
_clueless:_ Pretty sure I'm a human, Pidge. Do I look purple to you?

[ _hacker nerd removed clueless from the chat]_  


  
_keith stan:_ that was rude

  
_keith stan:_ just because hes galra... damn...

  
_hacker nerd:_ LANCE I SWEAR TO GOD

_[keith stan added clueless to the chat]_

  
_clueless:_ Thank you, my love.

  
_hacker nerd:_ oh my god

  
_hacker nerd:_ im out

_[hacker nerd left the chat]_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah boi i stan galra!keith dont @ me
> 
> honestly i am Sorry. i wouldnt be surprised if everyone stopped reading and like took back their kudos n hits. somehow. this is a mess.
> 
> still
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	14. memes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honestly this fic is a Meme Mess why does anyone read it

  
_clueless:_ I thought Pidge liked Lance and I.

  
_hacker nerd:_ I do. you can just be... too much.

  
_keith stan:_ OKAY NO

  
_keith stan:_ HOW DO YOU KEEP GETTING BACK INTO THE CHAT

  
_keith stan:_ NONE OF US ADDED YOU

  
_hacker nerd:_ ;) ;)

  
_clueless:_ Don't make him start the whole government spy thing again. _Please._  


  
_hacker nerd:_ but what if I _am_ a government spy?

  
_clueless:_ PIDGE.

  
_hacker nerd:_ payback is sweet keith, payback is sweet.

  
_clueless:_ I've done nothing to deserve payback.

  
_keith stan:_ yeah! leave keith alone!

  
_hacker nerd:_ honestly lance is your biggest fan

  
_clueless:_ Isn't it adorable?

  
_hacker nerd:_ no

  
_clueless:_ I just saw the rest of you come online. Don't even think about teaming up on us again.

  
_hunk of love:_ why, are you gonna go all galra on us?

  
_hacker nerd:_ OOOOOOOOOH

  
_clueless:_ I don't know what you're on about.

  
_keith stan:_ guys please

  
_keith stan:_ hes harmless

  
_keith stan:_ if anything hes like a cat

  
_clueless:_ I can be scary.

  
_keith stan:_ yeah, as scary as a cat hissing

  
_hacker nerd:_ OOOOOOOOH

  
_keith stan:_ hey. youre not allowed to ooh at me.

  
_hacker nerd:_ why? because I point out that your boyf is lying about what he said?

  
_keith stan:_....

  
_keith stan:_ yes

  
_clueless:_ LANCE.

  
_keith stan:_ y'know I realised you all yell at me a lot

  
_keith stan:_ # offended

  
_space dad:_ #??

  
_hacker nerd:_ Hashtag. Like when you want to talk about a certain topic online so you put a hashtag in front so people can look at posts about the same thing? You have to know what a hashtag is.

  
_space dad:_ Pidge. You must forget that I was captured by Zarkon for a long time, then 5 minutes after I got back from space I was taken straight back thanks to you idiots.

  
_hacker nerd:_ u and keith with ur sob stories smh

  
_clueless:_ Hey!

  
_space dad:_ They aren't 'sob stories', they are true events that happened in our lives.

  
_hacker nerd:_ yeah but ur like 'oh boohoo me I don't get pop culture bc im a poor, tormented soul </33'

  
_hacker nerd:_ this is literally u two

_[hacker nerd sent an[audio file](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdNOR8rdI9c)] _

  
_hacker nerd:_ lance back me up here

  
_hacker nerd:_ lance??

  
_clueless:_ ...

  
_clueless:_ He's too busy laughing.

  
_princess pop culture:_ I don't understand why that video is funny.

  
_clueless:_ See! Allura doesn't get pop culture either.

  
_hacker nerd:_ but she isn't like 'I don't get why that video is funny bECAUSE my home planet was destroyed by keith and I was asleep for 10,000 years :'(('

  
_clueless:_ I didn't destroy Altea.

  
_hacker nerd:_ keith and galra are synonymous tho

  
_clueless:_ nope. im human.

  
_hacker nerd:_ I stg keith I will make coran do a dna test on u

  
_hacker nerd:_...

  
_hacker nerd:_ he went offline

  
_hacker nerd:_ bc he knows the TRUTH

_[hacker nerd sent an[audio file](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRWbIoIR04c)] _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *x files music plays in the background* what is the truth ?? will pidge ever find out???
> 
> what even was this chapter (spoiler: it was a mess. just like my author's notes.)
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	15. bi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> shiro memes without realising he memed
> 
>  
> 
> this fic is one Giant meme

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> two updates in two days??? merry christmas

 

  
_keith stan:_ shiro, allura

  
_keith stan:_ I have something to tell you

  
_keith stan:_ im bi

  
_keith stan:_ biLINGUAL ADIOS AMIGOS

  
_space dad:_ Lance. You are literally dating Keith. We know that you aren't straight.

  
_keith stan:_ no hablo mucho ingles

  
_space dad:_ Anyone else want to deal with this?

  
_hacker nerd:_ keith n lance: professional deniers of things

  
_space dad:_ Not what I meant by 'deal with this' but okay

  
_hacker nerd:_ keith denying that he's galra

  
_hacker nerd:_ lance denying that he's not straight

  
_hacker nerd:_ guys we Accept you no matter what so chill and just accept it yourselves

  
_hacker nerd:_ I accepted my gender, now I feel better about it

  
_space dad:_ Pidge is right. Accepting who you are makes you a better paladin.

  
_keith stan;_ well this got real deep real quick

  
_space dad:_ Lance.

  
_keith stan:_ yeah yeah acceptance and love

_[keith stan sent a[video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PY-CF8t9mxA)] _

  
_keith stan:_ like that?

  
_space dad:_ I mean... You do you, I guess.

  
_hacker nerd:_ sdhskjfdlfj did shiro just say u do u

  
_space dad:_ Yes?

  
_hacker nerd:_ BLESST

  
_space dad:_ Pidge... Did the garrison not teach you how to spell? It's blessed.

  
_hacker nerd:_ okay 1: RUDE and 2: its another meme shiro

  
_space dad:_ Being illiterate is part of internet culture?

  
_hacker nerd:_ yes

  
_hacker nerd:_ have u even been paying attention to how we type

  
_hacker nerd:_ like at all

  
_hacker nerd:_ u, allura and keith are the only ones that type properly

  
_hacker nerd:_ and lance is slowly dragging keith to the dark side

  
_clueless:_ Not true. I refuse to be corrupt by you guys.

  
_space dad:_ Well then I'm glad I haven't been on Earth while this was around.

  
_keith stan:_ this is another reason why I called u space dad

  
_keith stan:_ ur one of those dads who's like 'oh u whippersnappers and ur internet culture,,, back in mY DAY'

  
_space dad:_ What's wrong with reminiscing?

  
_hacker nerd:_ oh.. shiro.. I envy ur purity

  
_keith stan:_ same

  
_keith stan:_ unrelated but how come hunk's never online anymore

  
_hacker nerd:_ shrug emoji

  
_hacker nerd:_ guess shes just not good at writing him

  
_keith stan:_ what

  
_clueless:_ What?

  
_space dad:_ Am I missing another meme?

  
_hacker nerd:_ ull never know ~~~~

  
_hacker nerd:_ ~~~~~spoopy~~~~~

_[hacker nerd left the chat]_

  
_keith stan:_ honestly it doesn't make a difference if they leave they'll get back in somehow

  
_hacker nerd:_ ur damn right I will

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fourth wall? whats one of those
> 
> but forreal i feel Bad bc i feel like i cant write my boi hunk so this fic keeps ending up just being pidge & klance with the occasional space dad ill Try to get him back in here tho  
> also  
> would yall kill me if i added in a lil sprinkle of angst ,,,, askin g for a friend
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	16. OG

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pidge wants to change things up. Keith is Done™.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay okay i gotta warn u : there is a spoiler for the last episode of voltron so if u havent watched it yet,,, maybe come back once u have! dont wanna be spoiling things for u
> 
> i gotta admit i was v surprised when u all said u actually wanted some angst so dont worry,,, ive been writing it and im actually about to type it up/edit it etc once ive uploaded this so ,,,, enjoy the crack while it lasts i guess!
> 
> ALSO thank you for 500 kudos omg!! thats so overwhelming brb while i cry

  
_hacker nerd:_ guys

  
_hacker nerd:_ I think we need to spice up this chat

  
_keith stan:_ pidge no

  
_keith stan:_ whatever ur doing. no

_[hacker nerd added Zarkon to the chat]_

  
_hacker nerd:_ too late

_[space dad left the chat]_

_[princess pop culture left the chat]_

_[cool uncle left the chat]_

  
_hacker nerd:_ honestly im just surprised they knew how to leave

  
_Zarkon:_ What is this?

  
_hacker nerd:_ VOLTRON GROUP CHAT

  
_hacker nerd:_ I mean u fit right in

_[hacker nerd changed Zarkon's name to OG space dad]_

  
_OG space dad:_ I'm going to leave

  
_hacker nerd:_ just try

  
_OG space dad:_ How did you even add me?

  
_hunk of love:_ Trust me, they have their ways.

  
_clueless:_ The more important question: Why, Pidge, would you add the very person we are fighting against to our group chat?

  
_OG space dad:_ I mean... While I'm here...

  
_OG space dad:_ Join The Galran Empire Today And Get 50% Off Of Your Uniform! There's Never Been A Better Time To Join Us!

  
_clueless:_ Did... Did Zarkon just try to advertise the Galran Empire to... The literal... Paladins... Of Voltron....?

  
_OG space dad:_ Yes.

_[hacker nerd removed OG space dad from the group]_

  
_hacker nerd:_ That's enough of that.

  
_OG space dad:_ Excuse you?

  
_hunk of love:_ Pidge, you've met your match

  
_hacker nerd:_ how did he do that

  
_OG space dad:_ I'm the leader of an empire that has control of most planets in the galaxy. I'm not getting kicked out of a measly group chat that easily.

  
_OG space dad:_ An Empire You Could Join Today! We Treat Our Soldiers With Love And Care, And That Is A Galran Guarantee!  

  
_clueless:_ Galran Guarantee... You know, I'm not convinced...

  
_hacker nerd:_ wow so I just shouldn't trust you if u guarantee something then huh keith?

  
_clueless:_ PIDGE

  
_OG space dad:_ Wait, what?

  
_OG space dad:_ The red paladin is a Galran?

  
_hacker nerd:_ half galran, but same difference.

  
_clueless:_ P I D G E

  
_OG space dad:_ Interesting...

_[OG space dad left the group]_

  
_clueless:_ Oh my god, Pidge. Really?

  
_hacker nerd:_ What?? It's not like he can do anything.

_[clueless added space dad, princess pop culture and cool uncle to the group]_

  
_clueless:_ Guess what guys! Pidge just told Zarkon that I'm half Galran!

  
_hacker nerd:_ so now he admits it.

  
_clueless:_ NOT THE TIME

  
_hacker nerd:_ don't get your mullet in a twist, keith

  
_princess pop culture:_ They did WHAT?

  
_hacker nerd:_ guyssss everything is fineee he doesn't know I was even telling the truth

  
_princess pop culture:_ We all need to be ready for anything now. Zarkon could try and attack at any point.

  
_hacker nerd:_ Guys, don't even worry about it. The guy's too busy trying to promote his empire to do anything else.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay listen. i know this fic keeps getting more and more out of character but stick with me. its all just memes.
> 
> literally my friend came round yesterday and it was a Meme Mess (but i also cosplayed Keith!! You should totally go check that out on my instagram : spacegracecosplay ! (was that a shameless self promo? yes. yes it was.)) 
> 
> and at some point we were watching like crack videos and Somehow i ended up bursting out with 'I SHOULD ADD ZARKON TO THE GROUP CHAT' (bc earlier she was reading the latest few chapters smh she wasn't even caught up with this fic what a fake fan (i know ull see this, love u really)) and somehow we then were like 'kjdfkdj what if all he does is try to promote galra' and i wrote up to 'Excuse you?' as a joke while she was there and then later i added more and somehow,, it now has relevance for,,, things that might happen (is that a hint to the angst? maybe hmm) 
> 
> anyway. comments and kudos would make me v haps! <3 
> 
> (also is it even 'Galran'? i hope so else this whole chapter is just embarrassing)


	17. choo choo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the angst train has arrived!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as requested, here's some angst ;) 
> 
> i couldn't think of any text-centered fight ideas and i also decided that if i was gonna write some angst i was gonna Write some angst. So enjoy a 2k word chapter, merry christmas ;;) 
> 
> i feel like i Suck at writing any kind of action scenes lol sorry in advance 
> 
> (also, since i've evidently given up with timestamps of any kind i should state that this is set like a few days after the last chapter)

Keith and Lance were cuddling on Keith's bed, laughing to themselves as they messaged the chat. They stayed like that until Keith's smile fell and he dropped his phone. Lance noticed this and raised an eyebrow, sitting up to get a better look at him.

"You okay?"

Keith was unresponsive for a moment, before screaming out in pain. Lance's eyes widened and he scrambled out of the bed, leaning over Keith. He placed a hand on his shoulder, looking down at his boyfriend to see what was wrong. In the few seconds that Lance was scrambling, Keith's eyes had become sclera yellow. Lance gasped, shaking Keith's shoulder frantically.

"Keith? Keith! Your eyes!"

Keith grabbed Lance's arm and in one swift move, spun him around and twisted it behind his back. Lance cried out in pain, but Keith didn't even flinch at the sound as he sat up, still keeping a tight grip on Lance's arm. He then kicked him down to the floor and stop up. By now, Keith had purple seeping through his skin. Lance slowly stop up, ignoring the pain he was feeling. He knew he needed to help Keith.

"Keith, this isn't you. Snap out of it." The hurt he was feeling was evident in Lance's voice as he faced Keith again.

His words having no effect, Keith just saw that Lance was in his way and punched him in the face with such power that he fell back against the wall. As Lance reeled from the hit, hands over his now bleeding nose and eyes closed, Keith simply began walking towards the door. Cursing his boyfriend under his breath, Lance scrambled back up in front of Keith for a second time, making sure he was blocking the door.

"Keith, listen to me. You _don't_ want to do this. You love your friends, you don't want to hurt them. You love _me._  Remember that, please." Lance's eyes welled up as he spoke, voice breaking.

"I don't love anyone." Keith said, emotionlessly, pulling his dagger from its sheath, swiping it across Lance's cheek.

Before Lance could react, Keith pushed him towards the bed and left the room without a second glance. Lance winced as he fell against the bed, but knew he couldn't just lie around. He needed to do something to help Keith.

 

  
_Keith stan:_ guys

  
_hacker nerd:_ o there he is

  
_keith stan:_ Something's happened to Keith.

  
_hacker nerd:_ ;)

  
_keith stan:_ Pidge, I need you to be serious.

  
_hacker nerd:_ Oh god. What's happened?

  
_keith stan:_ Something's happened to his Galra side. His eyes are yellow, his face is kind of purple?

  
_hacker nerd:_ But that's okay, isn't it?

  
_keith stan:_...

  
_keith stan:_ He attacked me. I know he'd never do this, so something's really wrong.

  
_space dad:_ Where is he?

  
_keith stan:_ I don't know, he just left his room.

  
_space dad:_ Okay. We'll find him, Lance.

  
_keith stan:_ Shiro?

  
_space dad:_ Yes?

  
_keith stan:_ Please don't hurt him. He doesn't know what he's doing.

  
_space dad:_ We won't. We'll keep him restrained, but we won't fight with him.

  
_keith stan:_ Thank you.

 

Lance then left the messenger and headed towards the door, not wanting to stay here and bloody up Keith's room. He was trying to ignore the pain, but feeling it or not, he knew he needed to get himself cleaned up, so he left Keith's room, placing his hand over his cut, wincing quietly as he did so. After a second, Shiro turned a corner and came into view, walking closer to Lance. His mouth fell agape at the sight of the boy, rushing over.

"Lance, what happened?" Shiro reassuringly placed his hand on Lance's shoulder.

"I guess you could say we had our first fight." Lance laughed weakly.

Shiro saw straight through Lance's attempt at hiding how the situation was affecting him, and frowned. "It looks like you took most of the beating."

"All." Lance corrected, tears filling his eyes once more. "I couldn't fight him, Shiro. He's not in control of himself."

Shiro noticed Lance tearing up, squeezing his shoulder for reassurance. "You're right. None of this is Keith's fault, it's Zarkon's. I have a feeling he has a part in this. We'll fight him, not Keith."

Lance just stared at him for a second, before wrapping him in a hug. "Thank you."

Shiro briefly hugged him back. "No need to keep thanking me, we need to look out for each other. As paladins and as friends. Now you go to Coran and get yourself fixed up, and by the time you're good, we'll have Keith back to normal."

Lance nodded, before breaking the hug. He smiled at Shiro and then headed to find Coran. Shiro continued through the castle and finally found Keith when he was nearing the Red lion's hangar. He stopped still, staring at Keith who was walking ahead.

"Keith. What are you doing?"

Instead of answering, Keith just turned around. As expected, the sight of him caused Shiro to gasp, eyes widened. Using Shiro's shock to his advantage, Keith turned back around, continuing to walk towards the Red lion. Shaking his head, Shiro ran over to him and grabbed his shoulder.

"Listen to me. You need to fight this." Shiro's voice became stern. "I know you can. You're a paladin of Voltron, this isn't you."

"You paladins... Do you all have the same weakness?" Keith sighed, and Shiro couldn't even recognise his friend's voice.

Keith grabbed Shiro's arm and twisted it around as he turned around himself, kicking the back of his knees so he'd fall to the ground like he'd done to Lance. Shiro grunted, but swung his Galra arm around to hit Keith's. It caused Keith to lost his grip, so Shiro stood up, stepping back a little.

"Keith, _think_  about what you're doing!" Shiro yelled as Keith got his composure back.

Keith ran at Shiro, but he easily dodged it by diving sideways, causing Keith to stumble. Shiro thought on impulse and grabbed Keith's arms, holding them tightly to restrain him. Keith began to struggle against the grip, but Shiro managed to keep him held steady.

"Keith, stop this! You're trying to hurt me, you hurt Lance!" Shiro yelled as a somewhat last attempt to get him to fight this.

It worked, as Keith stopped struggling, and his eyes flickered from yellow to blue. "W-What?"

Shiro sighed a little. "I didn't want to have to say that."

Keith fought against his own mind valiantly for a few moments, but what Shiro told him caused his thoughts to fly everywhere and he lost his hold on himself, and his eyes flickered once more, and the struggling continued.

"Keith! Fight it! I know you can, you just did!" Shiro heard footsteps behind him, and he looked over his shoulder to see Allura. He nodded at her, and she came over.

"You need to fight it, you know you don't want to hurt Lance again." Shiro felt bad for making him think about hurting Lance again, but he needed Keith to be _Keith_ for a second.

And once more, it got through to him. Closing his, once more blue, eyes, a tear fell from them. "Don't.. Don't let me do that.." Keith's voice sounded pained.

"We won't, Keith. Don't worry, you'll be fine." Allura then pressed a needle into Keith's neck, causing him to go limp in Shiro's hold.

Allura quickly held Keith up, and Shiro let go of his hands to then pick him up, carrying his unconscious as he and Allura began to walk through the castle. "What do you think happened?"

Allura sighed. "I... Think Zarkon had something to do with it all."

Shiro nodded. "Definitely. Keith wouldn't do that. Let's get him somewhere safe so we can figure this all out."

\----

Keith slowly came back to consciousness to the muffled sound of Shiro's voice. Wanting to know what they were talking about, he kept his eyes closed to pretend as though he was still sleeping.

"Lance said he sounded in pain before he changed." Shiro spoke, assumingly to someone else.

Keith was confused as to what Shiro was talking about, until his fuzzy mind started to piece things together. Shiro, Lance... Pain. _He hurt Lance._ At that thought, his eyes opened wide and he shot up in the bed, panicked and worried. Immediately, Shiro and Allura rushed over to his sides and tried to prevent him from getting up.

"Keith, you need to lie back down." Shiro said firmly.

"I need to see Lance!" Keith yelled, eyes filling with tears.

"Hey, hey, listen to me." Shiro's voice softened as he realised why Keith was in a sudden panic. "Lance is doing fine, he's asleep. We need you to rest for a bit."

Looking at Shiro helplessly for a second, Keith then gave in and lay back down on the bed. He sighed, closing his eyes. When he spoke again, his voice was a lot quieter, more pained. "I.. I _hurt_ him."

Shiro looked at Keith with pure sympathy, kneeling down by the bed, placing a hand reassuringly on his shoulder. "Keith, I only told you that because I needed you to fight the mind control. _You_ didn't hurt Lance, Zarkon did. We know that, and Lance knows that."

Keith slowly opened his eyes again to look at Shiro. "What.. Happened?"

Allura knelt down by Keith as well, next to Shiro. "We suspect that Zarkon figured out a way to manipulate your Galran side. Coran is already looking into it, and how we can prevent it from happening again."

Shiro nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Galrans have a lot of advanced tech, so it's no surprise that he's able to do this. We know this wasn't you, Keith."

Keith gave a small smile, and leaned over to wrap Allura and Shiro in a hug. The two smiled as well, happily hugging Keith back. They stayed in each others embrace for a minute or so, and didn't realise that someone else entered the room.

"Wow, first a clock party now a hug party? How come I miss all the parties? I'm a little offended, guys." Lance laughed a little.

Keith felt his heart stop, and Allura and Shiro broke off the hug, sharing a glance before smiling at Keith. "We'll give you two some privacy."

The two then left the room, giving a smile to Lance as they passed him, closing the door as they left. Lane then smiled at Keith, walking over to sit on the bed. Keith couldn't do anything but stare, feeling his heart break at how visibly injured Lance was.

"Cat got your tongue?" Lance asked with a small smirk.

Keith felt his eyes well up for the second time. "I'm sorry." He choked out.

Lance's expression softened, and he placed a hand on Keith's shoulder, frowning when he flinched. "Hey, it's not your fault."

"Everyone keeps saying that but... I hurt you, Lance. Badly, by the look of it." Keith looked down, trying to stop himself from crying.

"What, are you saying my looks aren't making you swoon anymore?" Lance jokingly asked, hoping to cheer him up slightly.

Keith just slowly looked back up at him, and Lance could see the guilt in his face, so he decided to just wrap him in a tight hug. Keith gasped a little bit and stiffened, but soon relaxed, hugging Lance back just as tightly, burying his face in his boyfriends shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Lance. I'm so sorry." He mumbled.

"As long as I don't scar, you're forgiven." Lance joked, laughing a little

Keith just winced in reply, closing his eyes.

"Hey, I was joking." Lance ran his hand along Keith's back. "I don't need to forgive you, because _you_ have nothing to be sorry for. Don't worry, I plan to attack Zarkon with all I've got for this."

Listening to Lance did make Keith feel slightly better, so he lifted his head to look at Lance, even giving a small smirk. "Does that mean you'll actually train, then?"

"I guess. I've gotta be able to defeat Zarkon singlehandedly to defend my boyfriends honour!"

"Maybe this wasn't so bad after all." Keith's smirk grew.

"Well, I guess you're back to normal now. I missed your sarcasm while you were moping."

Though he rolled his eyes, Keith pressed a quick kiss on Lance's lips. Lance grinned. "And I really missed that." 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look i made it fluffy at the (very) end so don't send me too much hate mail lmao 
> 
> don't worrrrry i plan to redeem myself by writing a christmas chapter!! and obviously back in the text format toooo
> 
> as always, comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	18. pidge...on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is just a lil tiny chapter to give us something in between angst and christmas ! 
> 
> anyway! enjoy!

  
_keith stan:_ well that was wild

  
_space dad:_ Appropriate response to the situation there, Lance.

  
_keith stan:_ oh cmon shiro everything's good now

  
_keith stan:_ if keith and I are fine, you guys should be too

  
_hacker nerd:_ So... How's Keith doing?

  
_keith stan:_ he's good, don't worry

  
_space dad:_ Where is he?

  
_keith stan:_ sleeping

  
_space dad:_ Ah, that's fair.

  
_princess pop culture:_ He has had a... As Lance put it, 'wild' time these last few hours, so I'm sure he's quite tired. Aren't you, Lance?

  
_keith stan:_ I slept earlier, im good

  
_clueless:_ Don't you guys have anything else to talk about?

  
_hunk of love:_ honestly, he gets more and more like lance every day

  
_hunk of love:_ and I don't know whether that's good or scary

  
_keith stan:_ okay rude

  
_hacker nerd:_ Hey, Keith, I'm sorry about... Well, everything

  
_clueless:_ It's fine, Pidge, you couldn't know that he'd do anything.

  
_space dad:_ What matters now is that everyone's safe, and we can prevent anything like this from happening again.

  
_space dad:_ But, I doubt it'd hurt to make a general rule of: try not to reveal our secrets around enemies.

  
_space dad:_ (that was meant as a joke. But also seriously, let's not do that again.)

  
_keith stan:_ shiro ur so precious

  
_space dad:_ Right. Anyway, Pigeon, you seemed restless earlier. Are you okay?

  
_keith stan:_.... Pigeon.

  
_space dad:_ I typed Pidge. What happened? Lance, did you do something?

  
_keith stan:_ WOW thanks for accusing me straightaway

  
_keith stan:_ but no, I didn't do anything. it's autocorrect.

  
_hunk of love:_ oh my god. pigeon. PIDGEon.

_[keith stan changed hacker nerd's nickname to pidgeon]_

pidgeon: oh my god shiro

  
_pidgeon:_ thanks for the new nickname

  
_space dad:_ You're... Welcome?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope u liked that! i feel like they wouldn't straight up blame pidge idk or thats just me being like 'none of these sweet innocent people can do anything wrong in my eyes' lol idk
> 
> ALSO 2 quick qs: ive already wrote quite a bit of texting for the christmas chapter, but would u guys also like a lil bit of just writing, too? i know ive done it a few times now but i feel like it Works better for bigger scenes. after christmas ill get back to just giving yall the crack u came forrrrr && also, would u prefer me to upload it like christmas eve/the day after christmas day (boxing day wahey) or just On christmas? like im wondering if yall would be online on christmas bc obviously its like a family holiday! i dont mind when i upload it tbh, whatever works for you guys! 
> 
> as alwaysss, comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	19. Merry Chrysler!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Christmas time on Earth, so the paladins decide that it's Christmas time in space, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHHH sorrrrry this took so long! I wanted it up on Christmas eve, but I ended up getting home a lot, lot later than planned. And then obviously I was busy throughout the holiday, but I finally finished it. Let's just pretend that I'm not like 3 days late.

_pidgeon sent an[audio file](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMRBYpbAHpk) _

  
_keith stan:_ oh please. theres a much better one

_keith stan sent an[video file ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=01SEjmByGFk)_

  
_pidgeon:_ okay u win

  
_pidgeon:_ but for real MERRY CHRISTMAS !!!!

  
_keith stan:_ its Christmas?

  
_pidgeon:_ yup!! keeping check on earth time comes in handy

  
_hunk of love:_ merry Christmas!!!

  
_clueless:_ Oh. Merry Christmas.

  
_space dad:_ Merry Christmas, guys!

  
_princess pop culture:_ What's.. Christmas?

  
_keith stan:_ YOU DONT KNOW WHAT CHRISTMAS IS???

  
_keith stan:_ I suddenly pity all Alteans.

  
_keith stan:_ its only the GREATEST HOLIDAY EVER CREATED

  
_hunk of love:_ Seconded.

  
_pidgeon:_!!! Christmas is amazing, Allura!!!

  
_space dad:_ It's a holiday we have on Earth to celebrate a religious occasion. You give gifts, have a big family meal and put up and decorate a tree.

  
_space dad:_ Pidge, why don't you get up a picture of a Christmas tree to show Allura?

  
_pidgeon:_ on it!

_[pidgeon sent an image]_

  
_princess pop culture:_ You put up a whole tree... In your house?

  
_space dad:_ Yup.

  
_princess pop culture:_ That sounds strange.

  
_keith stan:_ nope, it's _amazing._  


  
_space dad:_ Hmm... How about we have Christmas on the ship? Maybe we could land on a nearby planet to try and find something to resemble a tree.

  
_keith stan:_ YES

  
_princess pop culture:_ We shouldn't let anything distract us from our fight against Zarkon.

  
_space dad:_ Come on, Allura. It's only for a day, and the paladins are probably feeling the most homesick today. It'll cheer us all up, and even make us a stronger team.

  
_princess pop culture:_... Fine. But we leave again tomorrow.

  
_keith stan:_ YES!!

  
_pidgeon:_ ill try and make some decorations and get some Christmas music!!

  
_hunk of love:_ Coran and I can make a Christmas dinner!

  
_clueless:_... I'll pass.

  
_keith stan:_ nononono nope, not happening. no grinches allowed on this ship.

  
_princess pop culture:_ Grinches?

  
_pidgeon:_ it's from a Christmas film

  
_princess pop culture:_ There's films about this holiday?

  
_space dad:_ Yep, it's huge on Earth.

  
_clueless:_ I'm not a Grinch, Lance. I just.. Don't like Christmas.

  
_keith stan:_ well you've never had a _lance_ Christmas. you may as well be santa after today.

  
_pidgeon:_ ill make sure to find some mistletoe ;)))

  
_clueless:_ I guess I can't say no, can I?

  
_keith stan:_ thats the Christmas Spirit!

 

For the rest of the day, the group spent their time organising their own paladin Christmas. After a while of hacking, Pidge managed to get some Christmas songs playing throughout the castle, Coran Allura and Shiro found a planet to land on that would have something close enough to a Christmas tree, and then headed out to go and get it, while Hunk made a start on the Christmas dinner. Pidge, Lance and Keith (begrudgingly) decided to work on using what they could find to create some decorations, sat on the floor in the lounge area. As they did so, Lance sung loudly along to the Christmas songs.

"All I want for Christmas is you~" He sung with a grin as he pointed to Keith, who rolled his eyes with a loving smile.

"Why do Christmas songs have to be so cheesy?" Keith asked, furrowing his eyebrows at his attempt at making some paper chains.

Lance gasped. "Excuse you? Christmas songs are the best! Nothing beats them."

"I'm with Lance on this one." Pidge chimed in. "Christmas songs get you in the spirit!"

"Well, that explains why Keith doesn't like them. He doesn't _have_  a Christmas spirit." Lance grumbled.

"Hey, it's not my fault Christmas has never been good for me."

"I vow to make you love Christmas by the end of the day." Lance leaned over to press a kiss on Keith's lips.

"Kissing me is cheating." Keith smirked.

"Nope! Mistletoe is a part of Christmas, so kissing is too."

Pidge made a gagging noise in the background as they finished a decoration. "Do you guys ever take a break?"

"Your the one that offered to get some mistletoe, _pidgeon._ " Lance matched his boyfriend's smirk.

It was Pidge's turn to roll their eyes, trying to keep back a smile, going back to making the decorations. The three continued on like that for a while longer until Shiro, Allura and Coran came back onto the ship. Pidge and Lance shot up immediately, excitedly to go and admire their 'Christmas tree' while Keith was less enthusiastic, but still went over.

"It took us a while, but we managed to get a tree. At least, I think it's a tree." Shiro commented as he put it down.

"It looks so great!" Lance beamed, rushing to get their homemade decorations to start placing on the tree, Pidge doing the same.

"Are you on the Christmas hype train too, Shiro?" Keith asked idly as he remained by the tree as Lance and Pidge continuously ran back and forth.

"I think it's a nice holiday. Especially when you spend it with family."

Keith frowned slightly, giving a small hum of agreement.

Shiro cast a soft gaze at Keith, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. "I know you've never really.. Had that, but you have us now, Keith. And you're kinda stuck with us, so you may as well enjoy it." Shiro laughed a little.

Keith admittedly smiled at that, nodding. "No promises."

With a smirk, Pidge pulled what they assumed was a branch from their 'tree' and, after a minute of fumbling, managed to get it to stick up above the entrance to the lounge area to act as mistletoe. They then grabbed Lance and Keith's arms and dragged them over, pushing them under the door frame.

"Oh no, looks like you two got caught under the mistletoe!" They acted fake shocked, while getting ready to take a photo.

Keith and Lance both blushed lightly and Shiro smiled over at them. "Well, it is a tradition, guys."

Rolling his eyes for the umpteenth time today, Keith took a hold of Lance's face and pulled him in for a kiss. The two melted into the kiss, forgetting that any of the others were even in the room for a while as their eyes fluttered shut. They were only interrupted when Hunk came in from the kitchen.

"Dinner's read-AW!" He grinned as he looked over at Keith and Lance, who jumped apart in shock at Hunk's loud cooing.

Blushing once more, Keith and Lance walked back over to the rest of group who, giggling to themselves, began walking into the dinning room. And in there they saw a whole load of food laid out on the table, all of their mouths dropping open.

"Hunk, Coran, this looks amazing." Shiro commented as he sat down, followed by nods and hums of agreement from the others as they sat down.

Allura then came into the room, eyes widening as she took her seat. "That is... A lot of food."

Hunk nodded. "Christmas tradition! Obviously, I had to make do with Altean food but I think it comes pretty close to the real thing."

"Merry Christmas, everyone!" Lance called out with a grin.

"Merry Christmas!" The rest of them called back in sync, and they began to eat.

The group joked and laughed with each other as they ate, conversations ranging from Voltron to Keith and Lance's mistletoe kiss, which obviously earned a flustered reaction from them, and more laughter from everyone else. Keith smiled as he looked to his friends, his family. After all the years of not enjoying Christmas, never feeling this... Warmth. He finally understood it. He now knew why Lance loved this holiday so much, because spending time with the people you love, the people who are your family, is... Amazing. These people were his family now, and he wouldn't want it any other way. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry (belated) Christmas!!! I hope you enjoyed this chapterrrrr.
> 
> As usual, comments and kudos' would make me v haps <3


	20. rip keith

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> happy new years *sparkle emoji*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thought i should get in one more chapter before 2k17 ya feel
> 
> we're back to a complete mess now lads
> 
> enjoy

  
_keith stan:_ I just

  
_keith stan:_ I should have expected it

  
_keith stan:_ but im still. wow

  
_clueless:_ What's the matter?

  
_keith stan:_ walk into the lounge area

  
_clueless:_ Okay...

  
_clueless:_ Oh.

  
_keith stan:_ yeah, oh

  
_keith stan:_ PIDGEON get in here

  
_pidgeon:_ yes lance?

  
_keith stan:_ why is mine and keiths mistole toe kiss everywhere

  
_keith stan:_ why did you even take a photo???

  
_pidgeon:_ uhm, memories?

  
_keith stan:_ everyone saw it do we really need it everywhere

  
_pidgeon:_ allura and coran didn't see it Actually

  
_keith stan:_...dammit that's true

  
_pidgeon:_ eggggggxactly

  
_clueless:_ Eggxactly?

  
_pidgeon:_ Yep.

  
_clueless:_ You know what? I'm not even going to question it.

  
_pidgeon:_ good choice, mullet

  
_clueless:_ Why do you all feel the need to mock my hairstyle?

  
_keith stan:_ bc its stupid

_clueless sent a[video file](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=svIOr2LapwU) _

  
_keith:_ did.... did keith just... meme?

  
_pidgeon:_ KEITH JSUT MEMED

  
_hunk of love:_ this is going down in history

  
_keith stan:_ im.... im so proud of him :'))

  
_keith stan:_ Keith The Meme

  
_clueless:_ Well, I guess I've officially stooped to your level.

  
_pidgeon:_ welcome to the Meme Dream Team

_[keith stan named the group chat the Meme Dream Team]_

  
_space dad:_ And then there were 3.

  
_space dad:_ Normal ones, that is.

  
_space dad:_ R.I.P Keith Kogane, you will be dearly missed.

  
_space dad:_ Allura, Coran and I will avenge your sanity's death. I promise.

  
_pidgeon:_ KSJDFSFJFHJDJ SHIRO ARE U FOR REAL

  
_keith stan:_ Im laughing so hard shiro oh my god really

  
_clueless:_ Oh, come on. I'm still sane. I sent _one_ video.

  
_clueless:_ im not talkin like this am i

  
_space dad:_ Well... I mean, technically, you just did.

  
_clueless:_ I was proving a point.

  
_space dad:_ Sure Jan.

  
_space dad:_ I didn't type that.

  
_clueless:_... sure jan

  
_clueless:_ Okay no, I didn't type that either.

  
_keith stan:_ PIDGEON AND SPACE LANCE, THE MEME DREAM TEAM

  
_keith stan:_ pidge hacked u both :)

  
_space dad:_ Why?

  
_keith stan:_ idk to make u meme so u cant say u hate memes

  
_clueless:_ Lance, your name isn't even 'space lance' anymore.

  
_keith stan:_ eh, it has my name in it so i thought itd be better than 'pidgeon and keith stan'

  
_clueless:_ Fair point.

  
_keith stan:_ thank u

  
_keith stan:_ anyway

_keith stan sent a photo_

  
_space dad:_ What are you both... Doing?

  
_Pidgeon:_ dabbing

_clueless left the chat_

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> keith is me
> 
> anyway. lately ive been lowkey salty abt how many ships there are in voltron lmao but thats probs just because i love the Friendships so much more? so here we have lance and pidge bein best buds who meme a lot bc we all know they would
> 
> i hate dabbing personally but i can just. see them doing it 
> 
> ANYWAY: if any of u have any ideas for this fic pls pls come tell me on my tumblr : theredpaladn (no i) (also follow me i had to remake my tumblr bc i forgot my old one's password lol kill me anyway #promo) bc it would make me happy!! like this chapter was just me typing whatever came to mind lol it'd be nice to have some ideas (ofc id credit u toooo) 
> 
> LAST BUT NOT LEAST,,, comments and kudos would make me v haps! <3 (6k hits what is life)


	21. when will this end

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> shrug

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> honestly what even is this fic anymore . pls tell me yall still like it at least a little lmao
> 
> also the title isnt like legit like its just because when i write the chapters i title the notes really stupidly n this time it was 'when will this end' just bc its 21 chapters of Trash and i apologise lmao but i couldnt think of another title so theres a lil insight into behind the scenes lol
> 
> also this chapter is short and entirely a mess of klance & pidge im Sorry

  _keith stan added clueless to the chat_

 _keith stan:_ that was rude keith

 _keith stan:_ why wont u love me

 _clueless:_ I do.

 _keith stan:_ :')) i love u too

 _hacker nerd:_ klance is going STRONG

 _keith stan:_ as usual

 _keith stan:_ speaking of though

_keith stan:_ I had this weird dream last night

_pidgeon:_ ill tell u what it means

_keith stan:_ u can DO that?!

_pidgeon:_ there are many things u don't know about me, lance

_pidgeon:_ ya, I can

_keith stan:_ okay its odd

_keith stan:_ so basically I was like. an Altean prince

_pidgeon:_ right...

_keith stan:_ and keith was some kind of Galran royalty

_pidgeon:_ okay...

_keith stan:_ and really we just had this kind of romeo and juliet kind of love story

_pidgeon:_ is that it?

_keith stan:_ pretty much

_pidgeon:_ okay, yeah, I know what that means

_keith stan:_ that's so cool !! tell me !!

_pidgeon:_ it means....

_pidgeon:_ drumroll please!

_pidgeon:_ that ur gay !

_clueless:_ I just can't believe he really fell for it.

_pidgeon:_ I know right

_pidgeon:_ and we call _you_ clueless

_clueless:_ He's not clueless

_keith stan:_ thank u, keith

_clueless:_ He's just oblivious.

_keith stan:_ no thank u, keith

_clueless:_ You're welcome.

_keith stan:_ also im BI pidge

_pidgeon:_ sorry i thought u were just bilingual?

_keith stan:_ listen I just wanted to make a meme

_pidgeon:_ ur life is a meme

_keith stan:_ thank u

_pidgeon:_ but like the 2009 kind of meme

_keith stan:_ no thank u

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> quick clarification of the 'ur gay!' comment : obviously that wasn't meant maliciously and obviously pidge knows lance's bisexuality is valid, pidge loves lance (& klance)! i did it bc im gay as Heck and pretty much all of my friends are LGBT+ and we do joke like 'wow ur so gay' but obviously its just bc we Are and idk ya know what i mean? basically its not meant horribly, but also im 100000x sorry if that kind of thing offends you because i totally understand that for some people it can <33 it'll be a one off thing for sure it was just a silly idea i had 
> 
> but also the lil shoutout to the altean lance/galran keith hcs bc i think its cool but ive never gotten round to reading any fics for it rip
> 
> anyway. this was a mess and im sorrry lol 
> 
> still, comments and kudos would make me v haps! <3


	22. The chat but...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i hate myself

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is a Mess ! 
> 
> oh and guess what more memes
> 
> enjoy
> 
> (p.s. i realised two things abt last chapter that made me Hate Myself lol : 1- i forgot to ADD KEITH BACK but he was in the chat and 2- i used hacker nerd for pidge even tho their name got changed to pidgeon . so . i went back and edited it so there is just a lil extra at the beginning if u wanted to check that out. enjoy for real now!)

  
_clueless:_ Hey, guys.

  
_clueless:_  Do you ever think about how according to all known laws of aviation there's no way that a bee should be able to fly. Like... It's wings are too small to lift it's fat little body off of the ground. But the bee, of course, flies anyway because the bee doesn't care what human's think is impossible?

  
_hunk of love:_ uh

  
_hunk of love:_... No?

  
_clueless: ...._ Yeah, me neither.

  
_pidgeon:_ YELLOW, BLACK

  
_pidgeon:_ YELLOW, BLACK

  
_pidgeon:_ YELLOW, BLACK

  
_pidgeon:_ YELLOW, BLACK

  
_keith stan:_ ooh, black and yellow! lets shake it up a bit!

  
_hunk of love:_ I hate all of you.

  
_pidgeon:_ this chat but every time we quote the bee movie hunk kicks one of us out

  
_clueless:_ Wait, you guys are quoting something?

  
_pidgeon:_..... oh my god

  
_pidgeon:_ did you ask that seriously

  
_clueless:_ ... Yes?

  
_keith stan:_ fskfjdskfjds  what

  
_keith stan:_ keith you quoted the beginning of the movie  p e r f e c t l y

  
_keith stan:_ how did you not know that you were quoting the bee movie

  
_clueless:_.... I just think about bees a lot?

  
_keith stan:_ that's so precious oh my god

  
_keith stan:_ I love you

  
_clueless:_ I love you too, Lance.

  
_pidgeon:_ that's cute

  
_pidgeon:_ the bee movie bringing you guys closer :')

  
_pidgeon:_ who said romance is dead

_[keith stan changed clueless's name bee prince]_

  
_pidgeon:_ that sounds actually kinda cute

  
_keith stan:_ bc he IS cute

  
_pidgeon:_ man u just don't hide ur love anymore do u

  
_keith stan:_ nope

  
_pidgeon:_ klance is cute and all

  
_keith stan:_ still different people

  
_pidgeon:_ but we haven't checked in on shallura lately

  
_pidgeon:_ shirooooooooo

  
_podgeon:_ shiro! we need u!

  
_keith stan:_ we're all in the same castle

  
_keith stan:_ u could literally go find him

  
_pidgeon:_ too busy

  
_keith stan:_ doing what??? ur literally here, on the chat

  
_pidgeon:_ things u don't need to know about lancey boo :^)

  
_keith stan:_ im

  
_keith stan:_ okay

_keith stan changed their own name to lancey boo_

  
_pidgeon:_ good. anyway

  
_pidgeon:_ space dad, get in here!!

  
_space dad:_ What's wrong, Pidge?

  
_pidgeon:_ just wanted to know how u and allura are doing

  
_space dad:_ We're doing good, same as usual.

  
_pidgeon:_ good, good

  
_pidgeon:_ took her on any romantic dates yet?

  
_space dad:_ We're in space. Where would I take her?

  
_pidgeon:_ idk man that's for u to deal with

  
_pidgeon:_ but u gotta remember that she Is a princess so u gotta treat her like one

  
_space dad:_ I try to.

  
_princess pop culture:_ I appreciate your concern, Pidge, but he treats me very well.

  
_pidgeon:_ :')))) that's so cute

  
_lancey boo:_ I love my space parents

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay okay obviously i don't own the bee movie so pls dont sue my lol and i got the idea for the start from this tumblr post!! :http://coran.co.vu/post/155455766357/keith-do-you-ever-think-about-how-according-to bc it made me laugh n so i rolled with it 
> 
> anyway yes hello hi have a chapter also how is this almost at 7k hits thats so wild i ???? 
> 
> as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps ! <3


	23. blade of who

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> just some lighthearted crack to hide the fact that im in pain over season two :^)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello yes im Not dead ! whoa ! sorry i havent posted, school n whatnot
> 
> but anyway this chapter does contain spoilers from season 2 so i would advise that if you havent already, come back once youve watched (all of, theres a lil spoiler from the last ep too) season 2!! sorry, i just couldnt resist
> 
> i Know my fic is no where near canon compliant so it doesnt make 100% sense but i just had to make some jokes abt season 2 okay i was in Pain

  
_lancey boo:_ blade of Marmora

  
_lancey boo:_ more like

  
_lancey boo:_ blade of marMORON amiright

  
_bee prince:_ You know _I'm_ technically a part of the Blade of Marmora, right?

  
_bee prince:_ And so is some part of my family.

  
_lancey boo:_ okay

  
_lancey boo:_ more like

  
_lancey boo:_ blade of mar(everyone but keith & family)MORON, amiright?

  
_space dad:_ Ulaz was a part of Blade of Marmora. He helped me to escape Zarkon.

  
_lancey boo:_ how are u on here aren't u like lost in space

  
_lancey boo:_ okay take 3 blade of mar(everyone but keith & family & ulaz)MORON, amiright?

  
_pidgeon:_ don't forget thace

  
_lancey boo:_ uGH okay blade of mar(everyone but keith & family & ulaz & thace)MORON, amiright?

  
_hunk of love:_ without the Blade of Marmora, we wouldn't have defeated Zarkon, Lance.

  
_lancey boo:_ okay u know what I give up

  
_bee prince:_ Wise choice.

  
_bee prince:_ Although, Hunk, I thought Galra were _dangerous._  


  
_pidgeon:_ oooooooooooh

hunk of love: well, I mean, technically yeah

  
_lancey boo:_ *side eye emoji*

  
_lancey boo:_ what am I missing

  
_bee prince:_ When Hunk and I travelled to the Weblum, he was saying that he always gets the dangerous missions, because he was with the only 'Galra alien teammate'.

  
_lancey boo:_ UM excuse me hunk??????? whyd u call him Dangerous

  
_lancey boo:_ we've been through this. hes as harmless as a kitten

  
_hunk of love:_ I guess I never apologised for that really did I //:

  
_hunk of love:_ sorry, keith, I think I was just anxiously babbling, I don't really think you're dangerous

  
_bee prince:_ It's alright, Hunk, I get there's a lot to take in lately.

  
_lancey boo:_ good good everyones all lovey dovey again

  
_lancey boo:_ anyway

  
_lancey boo:_ do yall think coran fixed the pool yet??? I just wanna swim

  
_pidgeon:_ lance is a dolphin #confirmedt

  
_lancey boo:_ I mean. okay

  
_bee prince:_ Lance... A dolphin...

  
_pidgeon:_ it was just a joke, keith

  
_bee prince:_ Mm hang on a sec

  
_bee prince:_ That would actually make sense.....

  
_pidgeon:_ oh myg od

  
_pidgeon:_ another thing #confirmed : keith is one of those people who get shook when their horoscope says 'youll die one day'

  
_bee prince:_ Did my horoscope say that????

  
_pidgeon:_ dfhdfkdjgjhfskhfbjkncx

  
_lancey boo:_ keith I love you so much oh my god

  
_bee prince:_ I love you too

  
_pidgeon:_ Klance: conspiracy boyfriends 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (hoping u didnt read without watching season 2 because even more spoilers in 3..2...1)
> 
> LADS CAN WE JUST : GALRA!KEITH IS C A N O N YALL DONT UNDERSTAND HOW MUCH I SCREAMED I STANNED IT FROM THE START !!!!!! also i cried So Much throughout the season if yall wanna talk about it in the comments i am Down for that
> 
> but also ive been wondering lately if u guys could tell from this fic which character is my fave??? bc i feel like i might not make it All that obvious *side eye emoji*
> 
> as usual, comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3
> 
> (p.s. i wrote a galra keith reveal fic (with slight klance) if ya wanted to read bc dreamworks wouldnt give us one hahaha im Fine)


	24. You want to know what's going on?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is maybe the worst chapter yet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> kdshfksdjkdghf this entire chapter is a meme. its also pretty short, because it's just to upload somethinggg ! im trying to think of ways to incorporate the memes i wanna put in the chapters, into the chapters so, bare with me, sometimes i get slight writers block with this fic, believe it or not, usually with the start, but once i get going im fine. just gotta tackle the start.  
> anyway, enjoy this mess of a chapter!!

_bee prince:_ LANCE

  
_lancey boo:_ ya

  
_bee prince:_ Oh NOW you can text

  
_lancey boo:_ whoa whats up

  
_bee prince:_ What's-

  
_bee prince:_ YOU KNOW WHAT'S UP, LANCE

  
_lancey boo:_????

  
_bee prince:_ YOU DIDN'T TEXT ME BACK

  
_lancey boo:_ What do you mean??

  
_bee prince:_ I TEXTED you, and you DIDN'T TEXT ME BACK

  
_lancey boo:_ I didn't get a text from u, keith

  
_bee prince:_ Oh, c'mon, really?

  
_bee prince:_ You're such a LIAR! This is why we broke up the first time!!! Do you want me to break up with you again???

  
_lancey boo:_ we've... we've never broken up, keith

  
_princess pop culture:_ PALADINS. What's going on here?

  
_lancey boo:_ oh thank god. allura, talk some sense into him.

  
_bee prince:_ You want to know what's going on?

  
_bee prince:_ Lance didn't text me back.

  
_princess pop culture:_ HE WHAT

  
_bee prince:_ RIGHT?

  
_princess pop culture:_ Lance, what the quiznak is wrong with you?

  
_lancey boo:_ oh boy

_[bee prince sent a screenshot]_

  
_bee prince:_ Look, it says delivered!! He got the text!!!

  
_princess pop culture:_ I can't _believe_ he would DO such a thing!!

  
_bee prince:_ Right??? He's literally the worst !!

  
_pidgeon:_ hey, hey

  
_lancey boo:_ PIDGE!!!

  
_pidgeon:_ whats going on?

  
_bee prince:_ You want to know what's going on??

  
_lancey boo:_ nononononono

  
_bee prince:_ He didn't text me back.

  
_pidgeon:_.....

  
_pidgeon:_ you MOTHERFUCKER

  
_bee prince:_ ISN'T HE AWFUL

 

  
_lancey boo:_ oh mY GOD

  
_pidgeon:_ WHO DOESN'T TEXT SOMEONE BACK

  
_princess pop culture:_ IT'S COMMON COURTESY

  
_space dad:_ Guys, guys, guys. What's the problem?

  
_bee prince:_ You want to know what's going on?

  
_pidgeon:_  Lance DIDN'T TEXT KEITH BACK

  
_space dad:_ YOU DID NOT

  
_princess pop culture:_ Can you believe him???

  
_space dad:_ YOU DIDN'T TEXT HIM BACK???

  
_bee prince:_ I'M LITERALLY SO DONE WITH HIM

  
_bee prince:_ ALL IM ASKING FOR IS ONE TEXT

  
_space dad:_ HE'S UNBELIEVABLE!!!!

  
_lancey boo:_ im... gonna go find hunk and coran. maybe theyre still sane.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh boy, this was a mess. u may have recognised it, i was inspired by this : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xPjUaZR-wPk ! im honestly regretting writing actual angst for this fic, i wish i just hyped up the idea of angst and just gave you this chapter instead dkfjsdkgh  
> anyway, as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!! <3


	25. conspiracies

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GUESS WHOS BACK  
> (BACK AGAIN)  
> anyway yes sorry schools draining me and causing writers block but What's New! finally after what feels like a decade, ive managed to finish a chapter for this  
> was gonna do valentines but i was bussssyyyy (not with my gf sadly :(( she lives in greece n im stuck in england but i went out with pals for Platonic Love)   
> sO here we go, another meme filled mess of a chapter. Enjoy!

  _lancey boo:_ hey guys

  
_lancey boo:_ WHAT TEAM?

  
_bee prince:_ TRON

  
_lancey boo:_ I..................

  
_lancey boo:_ the one,, ,time

  
_lancey boo:_ I want u to Not say tron

  
_lancey boo:_ is the one ,,,,, tiME u do

  
_bee prince:_ I thought I was getting it.

  
_lancey boo:_ oh my god how many things am I gonna have to educate u on

  
_pidgeon:_ ;;;))

  
_lancey boo:_ NOT NOW PIDGEON

  
_pidgeon:_ ;;;((

  
_bee prince:_ I don't understand, Lance.

  
_lancey boo:_ high school musical

  
_bee prince:_ The garrison never had a musical.

  
_lancey boo:_ honestly how are u one of the smartest people but u don't understand a thing about pop culture

  
_bee prince_ : .....

  
_lancey boo_ : oh oh right hold on ill take this one

  
_lancey boo_ : lancE don't u remember:(( im a sad orphaned alien who lived in a shack, void of any human interaction or wifi connection outside of school with only my conspiracy theories to keep me warm at night </33

  
_bee prince:_ Well, without my 'conspiracy theories', we wouldn't be out here defending the universe, and Zarkon probably would've invaded Earth by now.

  
_lancey boo:_.... fair point.

  
_bee prince:_ Exactly.

  
_pidgeon:_ can I come back now

  
_bee prince:_ Yeah.

  
_pidgeon:_ aight cool

  
_pidgeon:_ so since ur conspiracy boyfriends

  
_pidgeon:_ what's ur guys fave conspiracy?

  
_bee prince:_ Mothman.

  
_bee prince:_ More a cryptid than conspiracy, but, Mothman.

  
_pidgeon:_ really???? so may cool ones and you choose _Mothman?_  


  
_bee prince:_ Yeah??? He's the coolest??

  
_lancey boo:_ keith would u leave me for Mothman

  
_bee prince:_ Yes.

  
_lancey boo:_ WOW

  
_pidgeon:_ o damnnnn lance u got beat by a dude who's part moth

  
_pidgeon:_ how do u feel

_lancey boo sent a[video link](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FEcRZFZERCg)_

  
_pidgeon:_ fair

  
_bee prince:_ Oh, come on, you'd leave me for a mermaid.

  
_lancey boo:_.....

  
_lancey boo:_ you got me there

  
_pidgeon:_ Klance: Is their relationship as strong as we thought?

  
_hunk of love:_ that's my favourite conspiracy theory

  
_pidgeon:_ hunk we should make conspiracy videos on klance

  
_hunk of love:_ i'm down

  
_bee prince:_ Wow, guys.

  
_lancey boo:_ our relationship is very strong thank you very much

  
_hunk of love:_ Or....

  
_pidgeon:_ is it?????????

_pidgeon sent an[audio file](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRWbIoIR04c) _

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> huNK MAKES HIS GREAT RETURN HECK YEAH  
> yall i should share : my friend caught up with this fic the other day n decided that we should reenact the scene from last chap, so we went onto our group chat n changed our names to bee prince n lancey boo (i was keith) and the madness ensued, but my friends Actually thought we were serious like they think im extra enough to yell @ her in the group chat for not replying to me oh my god i can't, we were honestly d y i n 10/10 would recommend  
> anyway. this was a mess.   
> i have nothing else to say here hope u've all been good tho sorry again for my absence 
> 
> as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!! <3


	26. yall

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes i keep disappearing for almost months at a time, its hard to be creative when college is a thing.
> 
> ANYWAY im back with another meme! i feel like its short but,, 
> 
> enjoy!

bee prince: Hey, y'all.

  
_lancey boo:_ keith

  
_lancey boo:_ did u

  
_lancey boo:_ did u really just say _yall_  


  
_bee prince:_ Yeah?

  
_lancey boo:_ were gonna have to break up

  
_hunk of love:_ I cant believe keith is texas

  
_hunk of love:_ like the entire state of texas

  
_bee prince:_ I... Was born in the south. I still have a few dialect quirks from that. What's so bad about it?

  
_lancey boo:_..... that entire sentence is whats so bad about it

  
_bee prince:_...

  
_bee prince:_ If you want to see Texan talk, y'ain't seen nothin yet

  
_lancey boo:_ im jumping out of the airlock

  
_space dad:_ Oh god, who started him off on the Texan thing?

  
_hunk of love:_ Lance.

  
_lancey boo:_ SHIRO talk some sense into your brother

  
_space dad:_ He's your boyfriend. And you started this.

  
_bee prince:_ all'a y'all're in for a rodeo if y'all think ya'll're gettin outta this that easily

  
_hacker nerd:_ I donT KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING

  
_space dad:_ Translation: All of you are in for a ride if you think you're getting out of this that easily

  
_hacker nerd:_ thank you, shiro

  
_bee prince:_ :)

  
_lancey boo:_ wait wait wait don't worry I can bring this back for us

  
_bee prince:_ *don't worry y'all

  
_hacker nerd:_ KEITH

  
_lancey boo:_ honestly why do I date him

  
_lancey boo:_ ANYWAY

  
_lancey boo:_ time to bring it back for the meme team

  
_lancey boo:_ u know how keith is a furry

  
_bee prince:_ How many times, Lance. I'm _Galra_ , not a furry.

  
_lancey boo:_ anyway yeah keith is a furry. and the state of texas

  
_lancey boo:_ so wouldn't it be

_lancey boo: ny'all_

  
_hacker nerd:_ NY'ALL

  
_hunk of love:_ HEY NY'ALL

  
_bee prince:_ I hate all'a y'all.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope y'all liked that
> 
> we're on the galra keith train for the long run so we may as well stop off at the texan keith station too
> 
> okay ill do a disclaimer: im not from texas, im not even from america so these are definitely exaggerations based on stereotypes lmao im Sorry but i had to do it, but im not trying to make fun/assume all texan people speak like this,, like even keith did it as an exaggeration so pls dont attack me
> 
> anyway as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	27. the biggest mess yet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *shrug emoji*

_bee prince_ : honestyl i love lance

_lancey boo:_ That's cute. I love you too, Keith.

_princess pop culture:_ i heard klance!! shiro, get in here!!

_space dad:_ KLANCE !!!!! SO CUTE !!!!!!

_hacker nerd:_ That's a sweet announcement to make, Keith.

_bee prince:_ lmao i know right???

_bee prince:_ i am the Best boyfriend

_lancey boo:_ That you are.

_hunk of love:_ Guys, we need to focus. We should all be training right now.

_bee prince:_ yeah yeah hunk were on our way

_lancey boo:_ Sorry, Hunk. We got a bit distracted.

_bee prince:_ ur damn right we did ;;)))

_hacker nerd:_ KEITH.

_bee prince:_ ;;(((

 

_bee prince:_ dammmmnnn did nyall see lance in that training session

_bee prince:_ my sharpshooter :'))

_lancey boo:_ My samurai.

_space dad:_ okay i know i yell at u two for flirting sometimes

_space dad:_ but DAMN that was actually so cute

_princess pop culture:_ they really are the cutest couple

_hacker nerd:_ You two do make a good couple.

_hunk of love:_ Yeah. You two seem to work better when you're together, too. It's sweet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY APRIL FOOLS!!!! 
> 
> i know this was incredibly short but it was surprisingly SO HARD to write them as each other. like, damn. never again. but i hoped u liked my little prank!!! (i hope its still before 12 for yall, i wouldve uploaded this earlier but ao3 was down for a while, it's almost 4pm for me). I was gonna do the classic 'im gonna delete this fic' but i love it too much to even suggest that, so i felt like doing something In the fic, so you got this mess
> 
> anyway, i wonder if you could guess who swapped with who? also, i didn't include coran i know im Sorry but then i wouldve had to 3 way swapped and honestly this was confusing as it was, so sorry space uncle :(( 
> 
> as usual, comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3


	28. lo.. what

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> guess what, someone else is joining in on the fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> since my last chapter wasn't really a chapter, here ya go. 
> 
> if you couldn't guess, the swaps from last chapter were keith-lance, shiro-pidge, hunk-allura !! 
> 
> also, i guess this chapter has some hints to one certain video from wondercon?? its not a Spoiler, and you won't even notice if you havent watched it, but i will talk about it in the notes at the end so, pre-warning. also, my inspo for this chapter came from this tumblr post!! : http://klanced.tumblr.com/post/159110470730/new-headcanon-the-team-has-a-running-gag-where

_hacker nerd:_ hey

_hacker nerd:_ I heard theres a new kid on the block

_lancey boo:_ pidge I swear to got if u add lotorn to this chat

_hacker nerd:_ LOTORN

_hunk of love:_ L O T O R N

_hacker nerd:_ oh now I have too

_bee prince:_ Why?

_hacker nerd:_ to make fun of him

_[hacker nerd added Prince Lotor to the chat]_

_hacker nerd:_ henlo

_hacker nerd:_ hello u STINKY LOTORN

_hacker nerd:_ go eat a kaltenecker ugly

_Prince Lotor:_ My name is Prince Lotor.

_Prince Lotor:_ Also, why does this group chat exist?

_bee prince:_ That's what everyone asks.

_Prince Lotor:_ Okay. But I don't remember asking for _your_ input, Keith.

_hacker nerd:_ OH NO HE DIDN'T

_hunk of love:_ run, lotor. _run_.

_Prince Lotor:_ I have nothing to run from. You paladins don't scare me.

_lancey boo:_ DID YOU JUST INSULT KEITH

_hunk of love:_ you have that to run from

_lancey boo:_ OH NO YOU DON'T, LOTOAD.

_lancey boo:_ KEITH IS PERFECT AND A BETTER HALF GALRAN THAN YOU WILL EVER BE. YOU SHOULD BE BLESSED TO HAVE HIS INPUT.

_bee prince:_ Thank you, Lance. Prince Bloated won't mess with me again.

_Prince Lotor:_ Why are all of you incapable of spelling my name?

_hacker nerd:_ so oblivious

_hacker nerd:_ but im glad ur joinin in, keith

_princess pop culture:_ Pidge, did you really add another one of our enemies?

_Prince Lotor:_ ALLURA! Finally, someone decent is here.

_princess pop culture:_ Ew.

Prince Lotor: You won't deny me forever. You'll soon see that we're meant to be.

_space dad:_ TRY AGAIN, GLOATOR.

_space dad:_ ALLURA IS MY GIRLFRIEND. BACK AWAY.

_princess pop culture:_ I'd listen to Shiro, Prince Loser.

_hacker nerd:_ OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH

_hunk of love:_ GO ALLURA!!!!

_lancey boo:_ GOD BLESS THE QUEEN!

_bee prince:_ That was a good one.

_[hacker nerd changed Prince Lotor's name to prince loser]_

_prince loser:_ Allura, can't you see? A Prince and a Princess should be together. Not a Princess and... Some failed experiment.

_hacker nerd:_ R.I.P Prince Loiter.

_princess pop culture:_ HOW _DARE_ YOU.

_princess pop culture:_ SHIRO SUFFERED AT THE HAND OF YOUR FATHER'S EMPIRE. HE ESCAPED.

_princess pop culture:_ HE IS NOT A FAILURE. HE IS A SURVIVOR. YOUR PEOPLE (save Keith) HAVE CAUSED ENOUGH DAMAGE.

_princess pop culture:_ AND WE, TEAM VOLTRON, WILL STOP YOU. PUT AN END TO YOUR REIGN. JUST WAIT.

_hunk of love:_ *mic drop*

_bee prince:_ How does it feel to be 6 feet under, Lotad?

_princess pop culture:_ Clearly, I scared him off. Shame.

_[princess pop culture removed prince loser from the chat]_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *shiro, blushing in the distance* wow i love my gf  
> *keith, also blushing, stood next to shiro* wow i love my bf
> 
> broganes got the best partners.  
> dskjfskjdsf i hope yall enjoyed that. obviously pidge's 'go eat a kaltenecker' was a jab at voltroNS APRIL FOOLS JOKE IM MAD  
> i saw the notif when i woke up bc timezones and i was screaming like !!!!!!!!!!! and then when i watched it i just. i died. 
> 
> but anyway. i had to add him at some point didnt i. obvs his obsession with allura is from the og series since we havent seen him yet but yaknowww. i work with what i can. anyway, i saw the tumblr post and immediately wrote this mess lol 
> 
> as usual, comments and kudos would make me v haps!!


	29. an eggciting chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> guess what time it is

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> helllo im here  
> THANK YOU ALL FOR 10K HITS OH MY GOD THAT IS!!! SO WILD !!!! i honestly never thought i'd get that many, let alone on such a crack fic lmao i love all of you :')))
> 
> anyway. here we go, its easter time. a day late but shhh we can pretend. 
> 
> i hope u enjoy!
> 
> (P.s. i just realised ive been calling pidge hacker nerd oh my god will this fic ever have continuity. ill fix that when i can be bothered, in this chapter it is actually pidgeon lol)

_pidgeon:_ HAPPY EASTER YALL! I HOPE WE ALL HAVE A EGGCELLENT DAY.

_lancey boo:_ you've got to be yolking me! it's easter already?

_hunk of love:_ yep!!! isn't it eggciting?

_lancey boo:_ eggstremely!

_space dad:_ Really, guys? Egg puns?

_lancey boo:_ shiro ur like 6 u should be more excited about easter

_space dad:_ I wish I never told you my birthday.

_lancey boo:_ :)

_princess pop culture:_ Easter?

_bee prince:_ Another Earth holiday.

_space dad:_ Pidge, can you get up photos again?

_pidgeon:_ on it!

_[pidgeon sent a photo]_

_princess pop culture:_ So... First, you have a holiday celebrating trees, and now eggs?

_lancey boo:_ Yep!!

_princess pop culture:_ Earthlings are strange.

_space dad:_ There's more of a story behind this one. I'll explain it to you later.

_space dad:_ But first, I guess since we celebrated Christmas, we should celebrate Easter, too.

_lancey boo:_ THERE'S THE 6 YEAR OLD SPIRIT!!

_bee prince:_ Isn't it cute when your younger brother gets excited about Easter. :')

_space dad:_ KEITH.

_lancey boo:_ oh my god keith i LOVE you.

_pidgeon:_ I cant believe hes finally on the dark side. emojis and all.

_bee prince:_... I guess it's kind of fun.

_bee prince:_ But anyway. I'm down to celebrate Easter. Are we finding some eggs?

_princess pop culture:_ Luckily, we're close to a planet, so yes, we can go and find some eggs. How many of these holidays do you have?

_lancey boo:_ so many

_princess pop culture:_... Yay.

_hunk of love:_ I could whip up some stuff to dye the eggs with!! And some chocolate! or.. the closest possible thing

_pidgeon:_ i'll get some easter decorations !

_space dad:_ Lance, Keith and I can go hunt for eggs. And if either of you dare to make a joke about that I'll leave you both stranded on that planet. :)

_princess pop culture:_ We need them to form Voltron, Shiro.

_lancey boo:_ aww, is iccle baby shiro having a temper tantrum :((

_lancey boo_ : oH GOD WHY DOES HE ALWAYS CHASE ME

_lancey boo:_ KEITH

_lancey boo:_ KEITH HELP ME

_lancey boo:_ PLEASE

_pidgeon:_ hes probably too busy laughing

_pidgeon:_ like the rest of us

_lancey boo:_ OH MY GOD

_pidgeon:_???

_lancey boo:_ KEITH JUST APPEARED FROM NOWHERE AND TACKLED SHIRO

_pidgeon:_ OH MY GOD

_lancey boo:_ THATS MY BOYFRIEND!!! I LOVE HIM!!!

_pidgeon:_ im lov klance :'))

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :')) theres a few reused themes here Kinda im sorry i only just realised lol  
> also. if u thought i wasn't going to make jokes about shiros leap year birthday you were wronggg (honestly cant remember if i have or not already Whoops,, if i have - theres some more) 
> 
> btw ofc they all dyed their eggs their paladin colour. Of Course. 
> 
> anywaY as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps! <3


	30. chapter 14 take 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a lil thing bc i reached 1k likes!! what!!
> 
> (the original version of chapter 14!)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I HIT 1K LIKES WHAT EVEN OH MY GOD I LOVE ALL OF YOU SO MUUUUUUUCH <33
> 
> TO CELEBRATE: here's a chapter that never got posted!! its probably the only one ive rewritten, and honestly, i lowkey wish i went with this version. its chapter 14, so obviously there's no continuity from last chapter to this one, and next chapter will carry on from chapter 29. confusing, i know, but i wanted to do Something for hitting 1k likes.
> 
> THANK U ALL AGAIN!! ENJOY!!

_clueless:_ I thought Pidge liked Lance and I.

_hacker nerd:_ I do. you can just be... too much.

_keith stan:_ OKAY NO

_keith stan:_ HOW DO YOU KEEP GETTING BACK INTO THE CHAT

_keith stan:_ NONE OF US ADDED YOU

_hacker nerd:_ ;) ;)

_clueless:_ Don't make him start the whole government spy thing again. _Please._

_hacker nerd:_ but what if I _am_ a government spy?

_clueless:_ PIDGE.

_hacker nerd:_ payback is sweet keith, payback is sweet.

_clueless:_ I've done nothing to deserve payback.

_keith stan:_ yeah! leave keith alone!

_hacker nerd:_ honestly lance is your biggest fan

_clueless:_ Isn't it adorable?

_hacker nerd:_ no

_clueless:_ I just saw the rest of you come online. Don't even think about teaming up on us again.

_hunk of love:_ why, are you gonna go all galra on us?

_hacker nerd:_ OOOOOOOOOH

_clueless:_ I don't know what you're on about.

_keith stan:_ guys please

_keith stan:_ hes harmless

_keith stan:_ if anything hes like a cat

_clueless:_ I can be scary.

_keith stan:_ yeah, as scary as a cat hissing

_hacker nerd:_ OOOOOOOOH

_keith stan:_ hey. youre not allowed to ooh at me.

_hacker nerd:_ why? because I point out that your boyf is lying about what he said?

_keith stan:_....

_keith stan:_ yes

_clueless:_ LANCE.

_keith stan:_ y'know I realised you all yell at me a lot

_keith stan:_ # offended

_space dad:_ #??

_hacker nerd:_ Hashtag. Like when you want to talk about a certain topic online so you put a hashtag in front so people can look at posts about the same thing? You have to know what a hashtag is.

_space dad:_ Pidge. You must forget that I was captured by Zarkon for a long time, then 5 minutes after I got back from space I was taken straight back thanks to you idiots.

_hacker nerd:_....

_hacker nerd:_ Wow, Shiro. Wow.

_clueless:_ Well then  _you_ must be forgetting who saved you from being experimented on and interrogated by Garrison scientists.

_keith stan:_ I saved you too

_clueless:_ whatever you want to believe, sweetie.

_hunk of love:_ damn whats gotten into shiro??

_hacker nerd:_ probs just hates the group chat bc it makes him realise hes OLD and doesn't get internet lingo

_space dad:_ Not old. Just NOT SPENT TIME ON EARTH FOR YEARS.

_hacker nerd:_ well damn shiro calm down

_space dad:_ I'm leaving.

_hacker nerd:_ where are u going to go we'RE IN SPACE

_princess pop culture:_ PALADINS. You can't be fighting like this, you won't be able to work as a team and form Voltron if you keep this up.

_space dad:_ Allura's right, guys. We can't fight.

_hacker nerd:_ coming from the guy who started the fight

_hunk of love:_ he just doesn't wanna go against his alien girlfriend bc he knows she could beat him in a fight

_keith stan:_ OOOOOOH

_hacker nerd:_ oh so I cant ooh at u but u can ooh at hunk

_keith stan:_ pidge shut up we're teaming up against shiro rn

_hacker nerd:_ oh right

_hacker nerd:_ OOOOOOOH

_space dad:_ ...

_clueless:_ Remember, Shiro, we can't fight.

_space dad:_ You're all infuriating.

_hunk of love:_ at least we're acting like a team

_space dad:_ I'll be in my lion, if anyone needs me.

_[space dad left the chat]_

_hacker nerd:_ honestly im just surprised he knew how to leave the chat

_princess pop culture:_ You should give him a break. He does a lot for the team.

_keith stan:_ a lot including calling us idiots?

_keith stan:_ also NICE keith u finally joined us

_clueless:_ What can I say, you have a big influence on me.

_keith stan:_ ur damn right I do

_keith stan:_ ...

_keith stan:_ ya know I complained but it's not the same without shiro yelling at me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope u liked that!! 
> 
> im pretty sure the only reason i didn't upload this was bc i felt like shiro was too mean but after season 2 we see that even space dad loses his cool sometimes lmao, hes just had enough of being called old okay (but now he would take that over being called 6 lmao)
> 
> also writers block is a Big Issue rn bc im in exam season so i dont have many ideas for this but if you have any, hit me up on my tumblr (theredpaladn.tumblr.com) or in the comments bc it'll give me inspo to write!! and obvs i will credit u!! 
> 
> anyway, as usual:
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps<3


	31. guess whos back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the title may be misleading
> 
> someone new is joining

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> when u cant think of an idea, add someone to the chat! it opens up a new wormhole to explore and boy,, this chapter goes deeply into a wormhole
> 
> hope u enjoy

_pidgeon:_ someones trying to access the chat

_space dad:_ Who?

_pidgeon:_ well if I knew that I wouldn't have said someone now would I shiro

_space dad:_ Calm down, Pidge.

_pidgeon:_ never. I don't know calm. I haven't slept in 10 days. im living on nunvill.

_princess pop culture:_ You should really get some rest. You won't be able to focus if your body doesn't have time to regenerate.

_pidgeon:_ guYS that's not whats important right now

_princess pop culture:_ Right. The intruder.

_space dad:_ We can rule out Zarkon - he got back into the chat easily.

_princess pop culture:_ And I don't think Lotor would want to come back.

_hunk of love:_ maybe its someone in distress?

_bee prince:_ Hunk has a point.

_lancey boo:_ let them join! lets find out!

_pidgeon:_...

_pidgeon:_ aight

_[everyones fave rebel_ joined the chat]

_everyones fave rebel:_ ayy whats up losers

_princess pop culture:_ Who are you?

_everyones fave rebel:_ oh right

_everyones fave rebel:_ the names Holt.

_everyones fave rebel:_ Matt Holt.

_lancey boo:_...was that a james bond reference

_everyones fave rebel:_ yes.

_pidgeon:_......

_pidgeon:_ matt?

_everyones fave rebel:_ that's my name

_pidgeon:_ its.. its me, Katie.

_everyones fave rebel:_ Katie??? youre a part of voltron???

_pidgeon:_ yeah, but, where are you?

_everyones fave rebel:_ with some super cool rebel group

_everyones fave rebel:_ its top secret tho

_everyones fave rebel:_ we're still trying to find shiro and dad

_space dad:_ Matt? You escaped?

_everyones fave rebel:_ okay how does everyone know me

_bee prince:_ We're all from the Garrison.

_space dad:_ It's me, Shiro.

_everyones fave rebel:_ SHIRO??

_pidgeon:_ wow thanks

_pidgeon:_ ur more excited to see shiro than me OKAY

_everyones fave rebel:_ well did I date u? didn't think so

_pidgeon:_ what

_space dad:_ what

_everyones fave rebel:_ what

_bee prince:_ what

_lancey boo:_ what

_hunk of love:_ what

_cool uncle:_ hwta

_princess pop culture:_ WHAT

_space dad:_ Quiznak.

_space dad:_ Allura, it's not what you think

_everyones fave rebel:_ oh man does he have a girlfriend now

_princess pop culture:_ Yes. He does.

_lancey boo:_ uh,..

_lancey boo:_ I hear keith calling me

_lancey boo:_ im gonna go

_bee prince:_ I didn't call you, Lance.

_lancey boo:_ yes u did come on keith lets go to the pool

_hunk of love:_ wait for me guys

_pidgeon:_ u DATED shiro and u didn't tell me?

_princess pop culture:_ Shiro didn't tell me, either.

_pidgeon:_ suddenly I regret trying to find u for so long

_pidgeon:_ I hate men

_princess pop culture:_ So do I.

_pidgeon:_ allura do u wanna go hang out and complain about shiro and matt

_princess pop culture:_ Yes.

_pidgeon:_ nice lets join the others at the pool

_princess pop culture:_ I'll meet you there

_space dad:_... Great.

_everyones fave rebel:_ uh.... so howve u been shiro

_space dad:_.. Really, Matt?

_everyones fave rebel:_ how was I supposed to know u had a new girlfriend!!

_space dad:_ I don't know, but you don't just announce that! You hadn't even told Pidge!

_everyones fave rebel:_ Pidge?

_space dad:_ Oh, right. Katie used the name Pidge to get into the Garrison.

_everyones fave rebel:_ smort

_everyones fave rebel:_ and yeah I didn't tell her we'd barely been dating for long before we went to space!!

_everyones fave rebel:_ technically, were still dating ;;)))

_lancey boo:_ were all watching the chat, just fyi

_space dad:_ LANCE

_lancey boo:_ HEY! don't yell at me, im trying to help u!

_bee prince:_ That's true. Lance was the only one who wanted to warn you.

_space dad:_... Thank you, Lance.

_lancey boo:_ did u actually just thank me

_lancey boo:_ what is this feeling

_everyones fave rebel:_ hey, back away from my bf

_bee prince:_ And you back away from mine.

_everyones fave rebel:_ wait WHAT

_everyones fave rebel:_ LANCE AND KEITH ARE DATING?????

_everyones fave rebel:_ YOU TWO HATED EACH OTHER IN THE GARRISON

_pidgeon:_ I told you. you owe me for that

_everyones fave rebel:_  o yeah I forgot about that bet

_pidgeon:_ but im still mad at u

_everyones fave rebel:_ fair

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao im sorry . i dont even know
> 
> SPOILERS!! SEASON 3 SPOILERS LOOK AWAY IF U DONT WANT THEM: this was inspired by that leaked screencap of shiro and matt bc DAMN,, suddenly i ship them. i died ngl. SEASON 3 SPOILER NOW OVER WE'RE ALL GOOD
> 
> anyway i hope u enjoyed this absolute mess of a chapter
> 
> as usual, 
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3


	32. more drama

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> everyones mad at shiro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another chapter oh my god  
> i got a wave of inspiration, like, a day after saying i had writers block. amazing. 
> 
> anyway. i've also got another one and a half chapters written but im going to try and stop myself from uploading them today (ao3 is blocked on my own wifi provider (rude, im trying to get it unblocked lmao), but luckily im out most weekends so i can upload then! i'll sometimes use my data to go on here but thats only on my phone *shrug emoji*) 
> 
> but i hope u enjoy this chapter too!

_bee prince:_ Wait.

_lancey boo:_ whats up?

_bee prince:_ I just realised that Shiro didn't tell me he was dating Matt either.

_pidgeon:_ keith we can bond over how AWFUL our brothers are

_bee prince:_ I'm down for that. Meet me at the bridge in half an hour, I'll bring space ice cream.

_lancey boo:_ I knew the space thing would catch on eventually

_bee prince:_ Not now, Lance.

_bee prince:_ SHIRO

_bee prince:_ Get in here.

_space dad:_ Uh.. Hey, Keith.

_bee prince:_ Why did you keep your relationship a secret?

_space dad:_ Well, you see,

_bee prince:_... I'm waiting?

_bee prince:_ Shiro. It's been 5 minutes.

_space dad:_ Ah. Did my message not send?

_bee prince:_ Don't make me tackle you again.

_space dad:_ Oh, come on. You wouldn't attack an innocent 6 year old, would you, Keith?

_bee prince:_ Try me. Find out.

_everyones fave rebel:_ wait WHAT SHIRO IS 6??? HOW MUCH DID I MISS??????

_space dad:_ I'll explain later, Matt.

_princess pop culture:_ Oh, I'm sure you will. Because you talk to him. Unlike me.

_space dad:_ Allura, please. We can work through this.

_princess pop culture:_ Or maybe you'd prefer to work it through with _Matt_.

_everyones fave rebel:_ okay im getting the hint that the alien princess doesn't like me much

_princes pop culture:_ No kidding.

_bee prince:_ Princess, hold on. It's my turn to attack Shiro.

_princess pop culture:_ Right. Sorry, Keith. Go ahead.

_bee prince:_ So, _Takashi_ , going to answer me now?

_hunk of love:_ oh man he pulled out the full name

_hunk of love:_ I'll start planning his funeral.

_space dad:_ Uh.. I was worried you'd judge me?

_bee prince:_ Shiro you KNEW that I'm gay. I wasn't going to judge you, and you know it.

_space dad:_ Fine. We were going to space, so I figured it wouldn't be important to tell you just yet. Space is a real test of relationships.

_lancey boo:_ aww that means we passed, keith <33

_bee prince:_ Dammit, Lance, stop being cute. I'm trying to be angry.

_lancey boo:_ :'))

_lancey boo:_ okay im going to allura and pidge. hunk, u coming?

_hunk of love:_ already there

_lancey boo:_ aight. see u soon, keith

_bee prince:_ See you.

_bee prince:_ Dammit, Shiro. Why can't you just tell me things?

_bee prince:_ You were all the family I had.

_space dad:_ But.. Now you have a bigger family so I'm totally off the hook?

_bee prince:_ No. But I can't be bothered to argue. I'm going to get some ice cream and hang out with the others.

_bee prince:_ You get none.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope u liked that!
> 
> honestly, yes matt is going to continue to be the Biggest meme in the galaxy 
> 
> anyway, theres some cool stuff happening in the next few chapters get Ready (dont worry, this chapter has the slightest angst hint but yall know im gonna meme it) 
> 
> as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3


	33. shenanigans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> when are they not messing with someone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hellO hello here we go
> 
> im glad all of u seem to like matt joining the squad, and i didnt think so many of u would be down for shiro allura and matt ;;;)))))))))
> 
> anway. time for shenanigans 
> 
> hope u enjoy!

_pidgeon started a chat with princess pop culture, lancey boo and bee prince_

_[pidgeon named the chat shiro SUCKS]_

_pidgeon:_ okay. me and hunk have come up with a good way to get shiro back

_pidgeon:_ not matt yet.. but we'll work on that

_princess pop culture:_ What is it?

_pidgeon:_ hey, lance, remember how angry shiro got at slav?

_lancey boo:_ boy do I

_pidgeon:_ exactly. I say we add him to the chat

_bee prince:_ Let's take it up a notch.

_pidgeon:_ im listening

_lancey boo:_ damn keith I love u

_bee prince:_ What if we make him and Matt have a really serious talk

_bee prince:_ And then boom. Slav.

_princess pop culture:_ I like this plan.

_pidgeon:_ sounds good. But we've got to get Slav in the chat beforehand.

_lancey boo:_ and that's where I come in!

_pidgeon:_??

_lancey boo:_ everyone knows me for spamming the chat with memes right?

_lancey boo:_ and no one ever reads it all

_princess pop culture:_ True.

_lancey boo:_ thanks, princess

_lancey boo:_ anyway. ill spam the chat, and in the middle of it - you add slav. shiro will never notice.

_pidgeon:_ nice, lance!

_lancey boo:_ always here to help ;'))

_pidgeon:_ hunk says he'll help you!

_lancey boo:_ THE BOYS ARE BACK!!

_bee prince:_ Alright. Let's go back into the main chat and do this.

 

_[the Meme Dream Team]_

_lancey boo:_ yo wassup

_lancey boo:_ its a bit too depressing in here

_hunk of love:_ seconded

_hunk of love:_ lance.

_lancey boo:_ that's me

_hunk of love:_ u know who u remind me of?

_lancey boo:_ the most handsome man in the galaxy?

_bee prince:_ Yes.

_lancey boo:_ keith :'))

_hunk of love:_ that, but also..

_hunk of love:_ the kazoo kid.

_lancey boo:_ oh really?

_lancey boo:_ well

_lancey boo:_ I guess its time to tell you something about myself

_lancey boo:_ I LIKE TO SING

_lancey boo:_ DANCE

_lancey boo:_ PRETENNND

_hunk of love:_ AND?

_lancey boo:_ I LIKE TO HAVE....

_lancey boo:_ FUN FUN FUN

  _[pidgeon added Slav to the chat]_

_lancey boo:_ FUN FUN FUN FFFFFUNNNNN

_hunk of love:_ NICE

_lancey boo:_ HEY HUNK,

_lancey boo:_ COME OVER HERE

_hunk of love:_ yeah?

_lancey boo:_ I just wanted to say....

_lancey boo:_ KAAAAAZZOOOOO

_lancey boo:_ KEITH!

_bee prince:_ Yeah, Lance?

_lancey boo:_ I HAVENT FORGOTTEN ABOUT YOU

_lancey boo:_ YOURE MY SEPCIAL FRIEND <33

_bee prince:_ You're my special friend too, Lance. <3

_pidgeon:_ AWWWW keith sent a heart!!!

_pidgeon:_ klance LIVES

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ofc . we had to have a plan to mess with shiro 
> 
> also thank u to mini_squatch for giving me this genius idea omg, don't worry ive already written the next chapter and shiro does in fact lose it ,, spoiler 
> 
> (also im pretty sure one of yall wanted to see kazoo kid in here a while back,, there u go lmao) 
> 
> actually ive gotten a few ideas from yall !! thank u sm omg it does give me so much inspo i lov it!! dont worry, ill be adding them in! 
> 
> anyway, as usual,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3 
> 
> (p.s. actually i just read through this chapter again and its pretty damn short,, so i might upload the next one later today or tomorrow?)


	34. mcfreaking lose it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> how do people still read this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here we go, another one of the team's infamous plans comes to life
> 
> yall know i could Not wait another week to post this chapter, so here u go. but also, my exams start in a week, and last for two! i miiiight be able to get a chapter up next week, but definitely not the week after bc then ill actually be doing exams. but don't worry, in 3 weeks ill have all the time in the world for this fic
> 
> anyway. i hope u like this!

 

_[shiro SUCKS]_

_pidgeon:_ okay we're ready to go

_bee prince:_ How are we getting Shiro and Matt to talk?

_princess pop culture:_ Leave that to Pidge and I.

_bee prince:_ Alright. Good luck.

 

_[the Meme Dream Team]_

_pidgeon:_ allura and I have done some talking.

_everyones fave rebel:_ oh god

_princess pop culture:_ We have decided that perhaps we were too hard on you too.

_pidgeon:_ yeah. I mean, matt, u only just came back. I should be happy to see you, not mad

_space dad:_ Thank you for being understanding.

_princess pop culture:_ But.

_everyones fave rebel:_ I repeat - oh god

_space dad:_ But?

_princess pop culture:_ But.. There's clearly some things that need to be discussed more between you two.

_pidgeon:_ allura and I are gonna go spend some time with the others, as well as do some work on the castle.

_princess pop culture:_ We'll be gone for at least a varga, so feel free to use this time to talk.

_space dad:_ I suppose that's reasonable.

_everyones fave rebel:_ Does this mean I've gotta be serious?

_space dad:_ It would help.

_everyones fave rebel:_ ughh

_everyones fave rebel:_ okay.

 

_[shiro SUCKS]_

_bee prince:_ Nice work, you two.

_pidgeon:_ thank

_lancey boo:_ does slav know to come in??

_pidgeon:_ ofc, we already gave him a rundown of everything

_lancey boo:_ niiiice, and shiro doesn't even suspect a thing

_princess pop culture:_ The plan is working nicely. Now we just watch and wait.

 

_[the Meme Dream Team]_

_space dad:_ So, I guess we should talk about where we left things.

_everyones fave rebel:_ Alright, but, can't we do it privately?

_space dad:_ It's only fair we let the others see. We owe them proper explanations anyway.

_everyones fave rebel:_... Yeah, okay.

_space dad:_ Well, I guess it's safe to say we were too occupied while in space to be thinking about _us_. So, before.

_everyones fave rebel:_ Were we ever official?

_space dad:_ I can't remember. I know we went on a few dates, though.

_everyones fave rebel:_ Yeah. They were nice.

_space dad:_... They were.

_everyones fave rebel:_ Uh.. So, what's the deal with you and Allura?

_space dad:_ Right. We got together a few weeks ago now.

_everyones fave rebel:_ Oh.

_space dad:_... I know, I'm sorry. I should've thought about you.

_everyones fave rebel:_ No, no, it's fine. We didn't know when we'd see each other again, if we even would.

_space dad:_ Oh, trust me. We would've. Pidge wouldn't stop trying to find you. It was sweet.

_space dad:_ I guess that doesn't help my case much.

_space dad_ : So, will I see you again, in person?

_Slav:_ But you, Allura and Matt are all dating, are you not?

_Slav:_ Oh, wait.

_Slav:_ That's in _that_ reality. Ah.

_Slav:_ My bad.

_space dad:_.....

_space dad:_ How did he get in here

_Slav:_ I'm everywhere, Shiro. In every reality.

_space dad:_ Slav.. We're trying to have a serious discussion here. Please, _go away_.

_Slav:_ That's not very nice, Shiro.

_Slav:_ Especially since in another reality _we're_ married.

_space dad:_ WHAT

_space dad:_ Delete that reality.

_space dad:_ Delete it.

_Slav:_ You can't just delete a reality.

_space dad:_ DELETE IT

_pidgeon:_ shiro and slav~

_lancey boo:_ sittin in a tree~~

_bee prince:_ K i s s i n g!

_princess pop culture:_ First comes love

_hunk of love:_ then comes marriage!

_cool uncle:_ thne comse Voltron in a babt carriagr

_space dad:_..... I hate all of you

_Slav:_ Even me?

_space dad:_ ESPECIALLY YOU

_lancey boo:_ jeez don't be so rude to your husband shiro

_pidgeon:_ slav if i were you id get a divorce //:

_Slav:_ In another reality, I did.

_space dad:_... There's _two_ realities like that?

_Slav:_ Waaaay more than two.

_space dad:_ google search how to delete a reality

_bee prince:_ Shiro, you're still in the chat.

_space dad:_ I KNOW THAT, KEITH.

_space dad:_... Why can I hear all of you laughing

_hunk of love:_ Because this is the prank of the century?

_space dad:_ I'm sorry what

_everyones fave rebel:_ ngl that was pretty funny to watch

_space dad:_ MATT.

_everyones fave rebel:_ chill

_lancey boo:_ he does that a lot, you get used to it

_princess pop culture:_ Did you really think we'd let you get away with lying to all of us?

_space dad:_.....

_space dad:_ So Matt how can I join this rebel group

_[princess pop culture removed space dad from the chat]_

_pidgeon:_ OOOOOOOOOOOOH

_lancey boo:_ DAMN go allura

_bee prince:_ How do you always get cooler?

_princess pop culture:_ It comes naturally.

_everyones fave rebel:_ yeah im just gonna sit here quietly

_everyones fave rebel:_ but ive gotta hand it to you guys - that was a good prank

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there he go
> 
> dont worry, slavs comment probably wont be the only shalluratt you see ;;;)))) thats if shiros ever allowed back into the chat after that TREASON smh space dad
> 
> anyway. as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!!<3


	35. blessed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> goddammit, i couldnt live with myself if i didnt post a chapter this weekend lmao, i love yall too much
> 
> anyway. like i said, im going to be v stressed/busy this week rip me so idk if ill post next weekend (but yall know me,,, theres a good chance i will.... end me)
> 
> but! here is a new chapter so enjoy!!

_everyones fave rebel:_ so uh I don't wanna get myself kicked out

_everyones fave rebel:_ but like. when is shiro allowed back

_pidgeon:_ honestly who knows allura could've killed him by now

_bee prince:_ Probably.

_everyones fave rebel:_ keef u should care more abt ur bro

_bee prince:_ Still with the 'keef'? Really?

_lancey boo:_ KEEF

_bee prince:_ Now you've started him off.

_everyones fave rebel:_ that's what im here for

_lancey boo:_ shout out to matt for already joining the meme squad

_everyones fave rebel:_ that's where im at

_lancey boo:_ noice

_lancey boo:_ anyway, back to keef

_bee prince:_ Great.

_hunk of love:_ KEEF omg

_pidgeon:_ might as well join in

_[pidgeon changed bee prince's name to keef]_

_keef:_ Suddenly, I miss Shiro.

_princess pop culture:_.... Same.

_princess pop culture:_ It was nice having someone else who was sane.

_lancey boo:_ hey! we're sane

_princess pop culture:_ Keef.

_lancey boo:_ touché

_hunk of love:_ ooh is shiro getting out of trouble early

_princess pop culture:_ I can't believe I'm doing this, but, yes.

_pidgeon:_ damn

_[pidgeon added space dad to the chat]_

_everyones fave rebel:_ welcome home, cheater

_space dad:_... I want to leave again.

_everyones fave rebel:_ babe chill its a meme

_space dad:_... Matt.

_everyones fave rebel:_ fineeee

_everyones fave rebel:_ u never let me have any fun, _sweetie._

_princess pop culture:_ Maybe you aren't as bad as I thought, Matt.

_pidgeon:_ oh my god

_princess pop culture:_ did allura just warm up to matt bc hes teasing shiro

_lancey boo:_ this is so wild

_everyones fave rebel:_ IVE BEEN ACCEPTED BY THE ALIEN PRINCESS

_everyones fave rebel:_ I LOVE BEING BLESSED

_princess pop culture:_ You should come visit us some time. It'd be nice to meet my boyfriend's boyfriend.

_space dad:_ Come on, Allura, we weren't even official.

_pidgeon:_ I cant believe this

_pidgeon:_ did we go through a wormhole into another reality

_Slav:_ There's actually a 23% chance that we did

_Slav:_ I mean, if you accounted for a few things..

_space dad:_ HE'S STILL IN HERE????

_hunk of love:_ I think he makes a nice addition to the team.

_space dad:_ No, Hunk, please. Don't say that. I can't lose you.

_hunk of love:_ shiro... u okay buddy

_space dad:_ No.

_keef:_ For the worry that Shiro might actually break down, Slav, I think you've got to go.

_lancey boo:_ it was nice knowing u :'((

_everyones fave rebel:_ im with hunk. I thought he was cool

_space dad:_ You hush.

_everyones fave rebel:_ rude </33

_Slav:_ In every reality, you're all wonderful. <3

_pidgeon:_ it pains me to do this..

_[pidgeon removed Slav from the chat]_

_princess pop culture:_ That was... More emotional than I was expecting.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;;)) allura is warming up to matt yall  
> shiro, however, is still suffering
> 
> like the writers, i cant give him a break. sorry shiro
> 
> (SPEAKING OF, josh keaton (shiro's va) told me he'd tweet me a picture of his caps. he forgot, so i made a meme to let him know i was sad abt it, and he onLY WENT AND SENT ME A VOLTRON MEME BACK LMAO. i lov him so much. still want to see his cap collection tho. djfsjk sorry im just so happy over it i wanna share with everyone)
> 
> anywAY as usual!!
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3


	36. trios

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> keef has a realisation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ayo its ya girl who's a mess and cant stay away from this fic
> 
> yep. after saying i wouldn't upload this week, here i am. feel free to yell at me.
> 
> anyway tbh i didn't have any exams thursday and friday So i hope that justifies me writing this chapter lmaoo. but yeah, here we are, i hope u enjoy this chapter!

 

_keef:_ Lance, Hunk, Pidge.

_lancey boo:_ whats up

_pidgeon:_ yo

_hunk of love:_ yeah?

_keef:_ You know how you call yourselves the 'Garrison Trio'?

_pidgeon:_ bc we are

_hunk of love:_ that's us

_lancey boo:_ memories:'))

_keef:_ Well.. Matt's return made me realise something.

_keef:_ Him, Shiro, and myself were the _original_ Garrison Trio.

_pidgeon:_ um WHAT

_hunk of love:_ back off our branding, keef

_lancey boo:_ I think the quiznak NOT

_space dad:_ He's right, you know.

_everyones fave rebel:_ THROW BACK

_everyones fave rebel:_ KEEF, MATT, AND SHIRO

_lancey boo:_ wait that's where keef came from?

_keef:_ Yep.

_lancey boo:_ oh no

_lancey boo:_ guys. I think they were the og trio

_pidgeon:_ nO

_hunk of love:_  n o

_lancey boo:_ and we're... we're following in their footsteps

_lancey boo:_ the bros (me and hunk) and the holt (pidge)

_lancey boo:_ oh MAN

_keef:_ Told you.

_pidgeon:_ how will we ever continue

_hunk of love:_ this cant be true

_hunk of love:_ it just _cant_

_space dad:_ I'm afraid it is.

_everyones fave rebel:_ lick it up baby

_everyones fave rebel:_ lick. it. up.

_lancey boo:_ did

_lancey boo:_ did u just make a heathers reference

_everyones fave rebel:_ obviously

_lancey boo:_ shiro im stealing your boyfriend

_space dad:_ For the last time, he _wasn't my boyfriend._

_keef:_ Hey!

_lancey boo:_ keef u know I still love u but heathers. HEATHERS.

_lancey boo:_ but before u ask what it is

_keef:_ I know what Heathers is, Lance.

_lancey boo:_ im sorry what

_lancey boo:_ did keith just say he _knows_ a well loved classic film

_lancey boo:_ (and its musical adaption)

_keef:_ Yes. I watched it with Matt and Shiro.

_lancey boo:_ nevermind shiro have ur bf back I LOVE MINE

_keef:_ Romantic.

_hunk of love:_ okay this _has_ to be an alternate reality.

_pidgeon:_ no other explanation!

 

_[space dad started a chat with everyone's fave rebel]_

_space dad:_ Matt.

_everyones fave rebel:_ wassup my dude

_space dad:_ You know how the others played that 'prank' on me?

_everyones fave rebel:_ yeah it was pretty funny

_space dad:_... Sure. Anyway, I want to get them back.

_everyones fave rebel:_ aight?

_space dad:_ And I need your help.

_everyones fave rebel:_ oh man im so down

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this fic: never ending shenanigans & pranks. 
> 
> to be fair to them, they are in space. what else is there to do. 
> 
> but yes, it's time for shiro's revenge with the help of his trusty sidekick (coughimeanboyfriendcough) matt! hmhm what will they do (spoiler: one of yall lovelies gave me the idea!) 
> 
> (on the note of ideas: im pretty sure i have one or two im yet to include but don't worry, the ideas are whirling around my head and Will be in the fic asap!!)
> 
> anyway, as per usual:
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3
> 
> (p.s. i had to take a second to laugh whilst writing this bc i accidentally wrote 'space sad' instead of 'space dad' and i just. tru


	37. roses are red...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> shrio tries to pull a prank
> 
> the key word being tries

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> look at me. uploading another chapter. why am i like this.  
> i hope yall appreciate this

_[the Meme Dream Team]_

_everyone's fave rebel:_ roses are red

_everyone's fave rebel:_ wont the blue paladin give me a chance

_everyone's fave rebel:_ my name is matt

_everyone's fave rebel:_ and im in love with lance

_keef:_ How about: no

_lancey boo:_ i..... what

_pidgeon:_ matt are u okay

_hunk of love:_ alternate reality confirmed

_princess pop culture:_ Does he want to steal everyone's boyfriend?

_everyone's fave rebel:_ guys... let me seduce lance in peace

_keef:_ Try that once more and see what happens, Matt.

_everyone's fave rebel:_ challenge accepted, keith

_everyone's fave rebel:_ roses are red

_everyone's fave rebel:_ blue is the colour of lance

_everyone's fave rebel:_ his gorgeous eyes

_everyone's fave rebel:_ have put me under a trance

_lancey boo:_....

_keef:_ Matt, I swear, I will track you down and _kill you_  if you keep trying to flirt with MY boyfriend

_everyone's fave rebel:_ hey, lance

_keef:_ Don't ignore me.

_everyone's fave rebel:_ i get a little bit Genghis Khan

_everyone's fave rebel:_ don't want you to get it on with nobody else but me

_keef:_ TOO BAD HE'S GETTING IT ON WITH ME

_everyone's fave rebel:_ for now

_keef:_ I SWEAR

_pidgeon:_ but wheres lance gone

_hunk of love:_ probably passed out from having two boys fight over him

_pidgeon:_ tru

_everyone's fave rebel:_ im sure my sweet kiss would wake him :'))

_keef:_ That's it.

_everyone's fave rebel:_ what u gon do keithy boy, we all know lance will choose me

_pidgeon:_ oh my god

_pidgeon:_ keith just grabbed his bayard

_pidgeon:_ hes coming for u matt

_everyone's fave rebel:_ KEITH WAIT

_keef:_ What.

_everyone's fave rebel:_ i think space is having an impact on lances health

_everyone's fave rebel:_ he's missing vitamin ME

_everyone's fave rebel:_ is lance a Disney princess?

_everyone's fave rebel:_ bc he's cinderHELLA FINE

_everyone's fave rebel:_ i still had a few more :)

_hunk of love:_ yo keith just grabbed his Marmora blade too

_hunk of love:_ matt u are screwed x2

_lancey boo:_ matt... is flirting with me... keith... is jealous and fighting for me.... i think im in heaven

_princess pop culture:_ The Red Lion just left the hangar.

_space dad:_ Oh quiznak.

_space dad:_ Wait, WHY DIDN'T YOU STOP HIM??

_princess pop culture:_ Well, if Keith wants to fight Matt, that's his choice..

_pidgeon:_ ohmy god allura

_space dad:_ IT WAS A PRANK GUYS

_everyone's fave rebel:_ whoops

_hunk of love:_ yo.. that's a messed up prank

_pidgeon:_ seconded...

_princess pop culture:_ Wow, Shiro.. Getting poor Matt to do it for you, too..

_lancey boo:_ how could u mess with my feelings like that

_lancey boo:_ and make keith think that i wouldn't choose him

_lancey boo:_ we literally travel the galaxy and i still choose keith over everyone

_lancey boo:_ that was harsh, man.

_space dad:_ Really. _Really._

_space dad:_ Y'all can prank me as much as you like and make ME angry but I get y'all back GOOD and suddenly I'm the bad guy

_pidgeon:_ SHIRO TURNS TEXAN WHEN HES MAD

_pidgeon:_ but still... how could you do that, shrio..

_hunk of love:_ totally messed up...

_hunk of love:_ but YALL

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shiro is always suffering lmao im SORRY ,,, maybe he can have some happiness soon,,,, maybe,,,,, yall
> 
> but yes. dont mess with keef is my advice, especially don't mess with him by flirting with lance. there's a good chance you'll die. 
> 
> lol anyway i hope u enjoyed thaaat!! 
> 
> as usual,,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!!<3
> 
> (lil edit: i forgot to say that credits for the idea of matt fake flirting with lance to make keith jealous goes to bcori1999 !! i loved the idea and then decided to twist it into shiro's prank lmao, i hope u still like it tho!)


	38. matt a tat tat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the castle has a visitor
> 
>  
> 
> or hostage
> 
> depends on how u look at it, i guess

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YA GAL HAS FINISHED HER EXAMSSSSSSSS!!!!! and my last one went So Well!!! 
> 
> so, here's a long chapter in celebration. *sparkle emoji*
> 
> also dont ask abt the title lmao, i literally came up with it when i came to make this chapter lmao (its like 'rat a tat tat' lmao)

_hunk of love:_ how long has keith been gone?

_princess pop culture:_ Just over a quintant.

_lancey boo:_ I miss him

_space dad:_ I feel bad. I never meant for the prank to go so far.

_lancey boo:_ its alright

_space dad:_ Thank you.

_lancey boo:_ I mean, ur only six

_hunk of love:_ truuuuu

_pidgeon:_ that's a good point

_space dad:_ Guess I deserve that one.

_lancey boo:_ forreal tho shiro we chill

_lancey boo:_ maybe the flirting was a bit far for a prank but u know what

_lancey boo:_ I saw how much keef cares for me and I just :'))

_princess pop culture:_ So the prank has a happy ending.

_pidgeon:_ just like in the fanfics:'))

_space dad:_ Don't you mean fairytales?

_pidgeon:_ nope

_space dad:_ Fair enough.

_lancey boo:_ itll be a happy ending when keef gets back

_hunk of love:_ seconded. we have to see the happy couple

_pidgeon:_ uhh

_pidgeon:_ speak of the devil

_pidgeon:_ Im monitoring security cams

_pidgeon:_ and the red lion just landed in the hangar

_lancey boo:_ WHAT

_lanncey boo:_ MEET U GUYS THERE

_princess pop culture:_ We're on our way.

 

Lance sprinted down to the Red Lion hangar, the others trailing behind him, making it just in time as Red's mouth opened to let out Keith... And Matt. Or, rather, Keith, with his Bayard against Matt's neck, walking down into the hangar with him.

"I'm going out on a limb, here, but I don't think Keith got the memo that it was a prank." Hunk said, in an effort to lighten the mood as the rest of the team gaped at the sight.

The words fell on deaf ears as Keith continued to walk over, and as soon as he and his hostage were by Lance - whose eyes were as wide as a deer caught in headlights - Keith grabbed a fistful of Lance's shirt and pulled him into an angry, but passionate, kiss. But Lance wasn't about to complain, instead he let his eyes fall closed and he melted into the kiss, heart beating at 100mph. After a second, though, Keith pulled back, flashing a playful smirk at Lance before pulling his Bayard away from Matt and retracting it.

"And _there's_ the happy ending." Lance managed to say, but in his head, all he could do was scream.

"Keith, buddy, it was a prank." Shiro said timidly, taking a step towards him.

"Like I didn't try to tell him that." Matt retorted.

"A prank?" Keith questioned, glaring at Shiro.

"Uh.. Yeah."

Keith walked over, glare still prominent, and punched Shiro's arm, probably a bit harder than he should have. "Dude! Not cool!"

"I know. I'm sorry, Keith."

"You better be. Try anything like that again and it'll be _your_ neck my Bayard is against. Got it?"

"Loud and clear." Shiro nodded.

Keith spun on his heels to face Matt. "Uh.. Sorry, about.. Y'know, holding you hostage."

Matt held up his hands in a surrender. "I'm still alive, we're chill."

Pidge wasn't listening to the conversation. Instead, they were just gaping at Matt. Their brother, who they hadn't seen in over a year, was stood right in front of them. Once this information processed properly in their head, they ran over, lightly shoving Keith out of the way so they could wrap their arms around him. His eyes widened at first, before he laughed softly, hugging them back.

"Katie, hey. Long time no see."

Keith was almost offended at being shoved, until he saw _why_. Then, everyone else in the room had the same thought and turned to leave the room.

"We'll give you two some privacy." Shiro smiled at the reunion, and led the rest of the group back towards the bridge of the castle.

 

_[the Meme Dream Team]_

 

_pidgeon:_ shiro

_pidgeon:_ u need a lot of works on ur pranks

_pidgeon:_ but I guess in the end it worked out happy

_pidgeon:_ and matts back with us so :')) thanks I guess

_pidgeon:_ but also thanks @ keith for being so angry and finding matt :'))

_space dad:_ It's alright, I guess.

_space dad:_ But speaking of... Keith, how _did_ you find Matt?

_keef:_ Honestly, I don't know

_keef:_ It's all a bit of a blur.

_everyones fave rebel:_ yeah for me too u know bc I had a knife against my neck

_keef:_ I already apologised for that. Take it up with Shiro, he started it.

_princess pop culture:_ Anyway... Matt, how long do you plan to stay with us?

_everyones fave rebel:_ however long im welcome, princess!

_princess pop culture:_ You're welcome to stay as long as you like.

_princess pop culture:_ In fact, if you could get contact with them, your rebel group can become part of the Voltron Alliance.

_everyones fave rebel:_ im sure they'd like that, thank u

_lancey boo:_ hey yall :'))

_hunk of love:_ lance... u just said yall

_lancey boo:_ yep :'))

_hunk of love:_ are u okay

_lancey boo:_ yep :'))

_hunk of love:_ yeah hes probably still on cloud nine because of keith's kiss

_lancey boo:_ yep :'))

_keef:_ That's cute.

_lancey boo:_ yep :'))

_pidgeon:_ okay now hes starting to sound like a yupper

_lancey boo:_ yup :'))

_pidgeon:_ fight me lance

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup!:')) 
> 
> I hope u liked that lil scene, i just didn't think i could do it Justice in text form!
> 
> but yes, matt is now living in the castle of lions! it can only get more memey from here, folks
> 
> and also... more romantic, maybe.... ;;))
> 
> lmao anyway. hope yall liked this chapter! 
> 
> as usual,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3
> 
> (also!!! shoutout to ColdToTheBone for also having the idea that keith should drag matt back and kiss lance in front of him. great minds, my friend, great minds.)


	39. sudsdenen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> we havent had enough klance action in a while
> 
>  
> 
> (she says, even tho the last two chapters were pretty klance heavy)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> whats this? an update in the middle of the week? im as shook as yall might be
> 
> dw, there's probs still gonna be an update this weekend tooo, but im at a con on saturday so it could be on sundaay. i do have the majority of it written (ill let yall know, i teared up writing it), but it'll be out this weekend for definite 
> 
> anyway. time for klance shenanigans!
> 
> hope u enjoy!

_lancey boo:_ hey, keith

_keef:_ Yeah?

_lancey boo:_ is that your dagger in your pocket...

_lancey boo:_ or are you just happy to see me?

_keef:_ Lance, you know I always keep my Marmora blade on me. Also, why would that make me happy to see you?

_keef:_ And, I can't even see you right now.

_lancey boo:_....

_lancey boo:_ youre so adorably clueless sometimes, ya know?

_keef:_ Okay?

_lancey boo:_ I better get blue to use her ice blast on me, bc youve set my heart on fire

_keef:_... _Oh_.

_keef:_ Yeah, well, you light my fire. <3

_lancey boo:_ <333

_lancey boo:_ I may be homesick for earth, but im lovesick for you <33

_keef:_ Cute. <333

_lancey boo:_ keith

_keef:_ Hm?

_lancey boo:_ I need some help

_keef:_ Of course.

_lancey boo:_ can you help me work out this anagram? sudsdenen

_keef:_ Uh.. I can try?

_lancey boo:_ Anything?

_keef:_ Not really, sorry.

_lancey boo:_ its cool, I figured it out

_lancey boo:_ wanna know?

_keef:_ Sure.

_lancey boo:_ the first word is send

_space dad:_ Alright, Lance. That's enough.

_lancey boo:_ what

_lancey boo:_ shiro how did u

_lancey boo:_ what

_lancey boo:_ this is a private chat

_space dad:_ Uh.. No, it's the main chat.

_lancey boo:_ no

_lancey boo:_ oh mY GOD

_lancey boo:_ brb im going to go curl into a ball and die

_pidgeon:_ OH MY GOD

_pidgeon:_ HOW DIDNT U REALISE IT WAS THE MAIN CHAT

_hunk of love:_ YOU WERE ABOUT TO ASK KEITH _THAT_

_hunk of love:_ IN THE GROUP CHAT

_lancey boo:_ SHUT UP, HUNK

_everyones fave rebel:_ wait.

_everyones fave rebel:_ keith, did u know it was the main chat

_keef:_ Yeah??

_lancey boo:_ whY DIDNT U SAY

_keef:_ I thought you knew too?? It's not like you haven't flirted with me in here before.

_lancey boo:_ yeah but not

_lancey boo:_ uuuuughhhh u didn't get it anyway cant blame u

_lancey boo:_ anyway, back to my regularly scheduled death by embarrassment

_lancey boo:_ bye

_everyones fave rebel:_ this is golden

_everyones fave rebel:_ maybe I should steal some of lances lines though

_space dad:_ Don't you dare.

_everyones fave rebel:_ who said theyd be to u, hm?? ;))

_space dad:_ I... don't want to know.

 

 

_keef:_.... I just want to know the answer to the anagram.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> behind the scenes during this chapter:   
> shiro: Should we... stop them?  
> pidge: no way lmao   
> hunk: lets see how far they go with this..  
> shiro: Anagram?  
> pidge: hold on let me work it ouT OH MY GOD  
> pidge: IT'S SEND NUDES  
> shiro: Yeah, I'm pulling the plug on this.
> 
> lmao rip lance
> 
> this idea came from origumicloud on tumblr!! ngl i cried bc they messaged my tumblr (theredpaladn ;;)) ) saying they loved the fic even tho they don't watch votlron! they said theyre gonna watch it tho, so congrats yall, we dragged someone into hell with us ;;)) but yeS anyway they wanted to see some klance accidentally flirting in the group chat paired with the send nudes meme ;;))
> 
> took me a while to get it in im Sorry i lov the idea i was just trying to think of a slick way to put it in, i hope this did it justice!! 
> 
> dw ive got a List compiled of the ideas yall wanna see so there'll be in here somewhere! feel free to keep giving them!
> 
> anywaY i hope yall liked this!!!
> 
> as usual,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	40. cruel world

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> rip

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as promised, a weekend update too!!
> 
> lmao i may have teared up a bit writing some of this chapter lmao im Sorry 
> 
> hopefully its just that im a mess and its not too sad sdkfjsl
> 
> enjoy!

  _pidgeon:_ yalldve

_keef:_ Don't steal my brand

_lancey boo:_ um back off pidge

_lancey boo:_ don't u make fun of him for that too

_pidgeon:_ at least I know which chat im using

_lancey boo:_ i......

_lancey boo:_ how could you hurt me this way pidge

_lancey boo:_ that hit me hard

_lancey boo:_ so hard, in fact, i think... i think im dying

_pidgeon:_ lance shut up

_lancey boo:_ OUCH

_lancey boo:_ adding more injuries, i see

_lacey boo:_ i think... these are going to be my last moments

_lancey boo:_ matt, i leave the blue lion to u

_everyones fave rebel:_ sweet

_lancey boo:_ shiro, i trust that you'll tell my family that i love them... tell them i miss them

_lancey boo:_ hunk... ill miss u buddy

_lancey boo:_ keep my memeory alive

_lancey boo:_ and keith... i love you

_pidgeon:_ ur not dying lance

_lancey boo:_ THE DAMAGE IS DONE, PIDGE

_lancey boo:_ i may only have seconds left to live

_pidgeon:_ keith speak some sense to him

_keef:_ Lance...

_lancey boo:_ yes, my love?

_keef:_ If these are going to be your last moments alive

_lancey boo:_ oh my god

_keef:_ I need to tell you.. I love you.

_keef:_ I'll miss you, so much.

_keef:_ You were always special to me.

_lancey boo:_ thank u for making my last moments so nice, keef:'))

_keef:_ Of course. I don't want you to die in pain.

_keef:_ Or in vain. We'll keep your memory alive.

_keef:_ Your legacy will live on through Voltron.

_lancey boo:_ i think.. its my time, keith

_keef:_ You can let go, Lance. It's okay.

_lancey boo:_ I'll always love you, keith

_lancey boo:_ i cant believe this is how im going

_lancey boo:_ good bye.... cruel world

_keef:_ How... Will I ever go on without him

_keef:_ I can't believe you killed my boyfriend, Pidge.

_pidgeon:_ i cant believe u joined in with his melodramatic mess, keith

_keef:_ I don't know what you're saying. I was trying to make my boyfriend's last moments comfortable.

_space dad:_ Wait, what? What's going on?

_keef:_ Pidge killed Lance.

_princess pop culture:_ WHAT

_hunk of love:_ im sorry WHAT

_pidgeon:_ oh my god don't yall ever read up in the chat

_lancey boo:_ im alive

_keef:_ A miracle!!!

_lancey boo:_  i know:'))

_princess pop culture:_ Don't scare us like that, Keith.

_keef:_ Well, for all I knew, Lance _could_ have been dying.

_hunk of love:_ i just read it all

_hunk of love:_ now im crying

_hunk of love:_ goddammit, keith and lance

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yalldve 
> 
> keith is slowly becoming a meme too lol lance is a bad influence
> 
> i hope u liked that!! a shoutout and thank u to CaninaStarstreak for the amazin idea of lance having a big goodbye cruel world scene in response to the smallest burn lmao i lov it
> 
> also this is random but yall know im a mess so lemme tell u how Much of a mess i am : last night i had a dream that i was friends with jeremy shada and i Literally asked him 'have u heard of the netflix show voltron?' IM 
> 
> even my dream self is a mess
> 
> anyway. 
> 
> as usuaalll,


	41. bonding exercise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> when the cats are away, the mice will play
> 
> but whos to say the cats cant join in too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yoooooooo how are yall doin
> 
> ready for some fluff? bc ur abt to be hit with some (i think we deserve it after the accidental angst last chapter)
> 
> ya gal's back at it again with writing out a scene lmao rip hope u like it

 

_princess pop culture:_ Paladins. We are receiving a distress call.

_space dad:_ Alright. Everyone to your lions.

_keef:_ Yes sir

_pidgeon:_ on my way!!

_hunk of love:_ copy that!

_lancey boo:_ ai papi

_space dad:_ LANCE.

_lancey boo:_ u never let me have fun

_lancey boo:_ on my way

 

_everyones fave rebel:_ damn. its a bit quiet without them

_princess pop culture:_ Yeah. They'll be talking to each other on the coms rather than here.

_everyones fave rebel:_ hmm,, well as they say

_everyones fave rebel:_ when the cats are away, the mice will play!

_princess pop culture:_ What?

_everyones fave rebel:_ bless u

_everyones fave rebel:_ its a metaphor!! the cats are those guys, we are the mice

_princess pop culture:_ Oh!! So, while they're on a mission, we can play?

_everyones fave rebel:_ essentially

_princess pop culture:_ That sounds fun. Usually Coran and I provide cloud cover but the paladins seem to be handling this mission fine alone.

_everyones fave rebel:_ nice!! wanna hang out then?

_princess pop culture:_ Okay! It'll be nice to properly get to know you better.

 

_lancey boo:_... tell me im not the only one seeing this

_keef:_ I see it.

_hunk of love:_ same....

_pidgeon:_ what is going on

_space dad:_ I'm afraid.

_space dad:_ But also... I kind of like it.

_lancey boo:_ wait. ARE THEY USING MY FACEMASKS WITHOUT ME?????

_princess pop culture:_ Oh, paladins! Welcome back!

_princess pop culture:_ And, yes, Lance. Sorry. You're welcome to join us!

_lancey boo:_ I mean... im still a bit annoyed

_lancey boo:_ but... I have always wanted an excuse to put a facemask on keith so leTS GO

_keef:_ What?

_lancey boo:_ cmon keef!!! facemask time!!!

_keef:_.. Fine.

_lancey boo:_ NICE

_space dad:_ Hey, wait for me. If Allura and Matt are doing it, I want in, too.

_hunk of love:_ room for one more?

_princess pop culture:_ Of course! I'm sure you could all use a rest after your mission.

_pidgeon:_ I guess I could join, too

_pidgeon:_ but if I am, coran's gotta come as well

_princess pop culture:_ I'll go get him! Everyone get changed, so you're more comfy

_keef:_ Well this is a strange team bonding exercise.

_lancey boo:_ buuuut u love it

 

The paladins all went off to their rooms to change out of their armour. Lance was the first to change, meaning Keith was only seconds behind. Lance chose to change into his pyjamas, and made Keith compromise: he was still wearing his shirt, but Lance had found out the pyjamas of the previous red paladin, so Keith was wearing the bottoms. Then, Lance grabbed a bag of his beauty products in one hand, Keith's hand in the other and practically sprinted back down to the bridge where Allura and Matt were waiting. Keith sighed loud enough for Lance to hear, but there was a smile playing at his lips.

The others were soon to arrive too. Allura had called Coran down, so he was next to arrive after Keith and Lance, then Pidge and Hunk, and then Shiro, who'd had an adoring smile on his face since the second he laid eyes on Matt and Allura after walking back into the castle. They all settled down in the bridge, Shiro obviously choosing to sit next to his two not so subtle crushes, Keith and Lance were practically on each others laps, Pidge was sat close to Matt, too, happy to be spending time with their brother after all this time, Hunk was next to Pidge and Coran next to Hunk.

Lance started to pass round some of his beauty products for them all to use, and then turned to Keith with a smile. Keith raised an eyebrow, but before he could question his boyfriend, he was already running his fingers through his hair to pull it back into a small bun, and then put a headband on him, too, so all his hair was out of his face. And when Lance saw his finished product, he was definitely at a loss for words for how good Keith looked.

" _Damn._ " He breathed, and leaned closer to place a quick kiss on Keith's lips, who was now blushing.

On the other side of romance town, Allura and Matt had smiles of their own, deciding to attack Shiro with a face mask. Allura pushed back his bangs, and Matt began to apply the mask.

"Cold, cold cold cold." Shiro complained, but he didn't bother trying to move away from the two.

"Don't be such a baby, Takashi." Matt smirked, continuing to apply the mask.

"This is fun." Allura commented, her voice soft. "Getting to hang out with my boyfriend, and his boyfriend." She laughed, and both Matt and Shiro were in awe at the sound.

"Still with that?" Any other time, Shiro would've sounded sad or sorry when he said that, but this time, his tone was playful.

"Of course." Allura smirked, placing a kiss on Shiro's forehead, where Matt hadn't yet put any facemask.

At some point, Coran had gone to go and make the closest thing to Earth tea he could and bring it back for them all, which was met with a wave of cheers. After Keith had applied Lance's facemask, they both helped Pidge and Hunk do theirs, and then everyone decided to collectively try and put one on Coran, which didn't go too well, considering his moustache took up half of his face. Still, they were all laughing and having a good time while they attempted it. And while they were all waiting for their facemasks to dry, they sat around to drink their tea, everyone sharing stories or jokes, and generally having a good time. They may be a strange, rag tag kind of family, but none of them would trade it for anything else in the galaxy, and they all knew this night would stay with them forever.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> listEN i have such a soft spot for the team all hanging out also everyone in facemasks bc lance is a skin care God 
> 
> also, i imagine when allura said 'the paladins seem to be doing fine on their own' it just cuts to all of them collectively screaming while being shot at by galra lmao
> 
> but yes i wanted to get some allura/matt times in there but i feel v iffy writing matt just bc we've seen like 5 seconds of him so obvs i dont have a grasp of his character so i decided to leave it to ur imagination what they were doin/talking about when it was just them (feel free to share it with me if u think of anything im ready to cry with yall). sO why not add the whole team so we have a cute scene in general !! 
> 
> anywaaaaay hope yall liked that!! i have like nothing to say lmao rip okay 
> 
> as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!!<3


	42. a Fight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> honestly who even knows anymore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO HELLO HELLO
> 
> im not dead and id never abandon this fic, ive just been busy rip, i actually had a social life for once lmao can u Believe bc i cant
> 
> also lowkey ive written chapters for this and deleted them lmao for some reason im feelin //: abt what i write for this ,, i hope yall still like it lmao im just worried im Losing it ya know? as much as its a crack fic i still want it to be like. somewhat good ya get me
> 
> buT yes here i am with a chapter,,, and bc i didn't upload for like two weeks ill upload the next chapter tomorrow to make up for it!!!
> 
> enjoy!

_pidgeon:_ oh my gooood what is it with all the romance on this ship

_pidgeon:_ can yall chill for like . 5 seconds

_keef:_ Well, if you think about it, we are the only humans in space. It's natural.

_pidgeon:_ shut up ur not even human

_keef:_ I'm literally more human than I am Galra.

_keef:_ Fight me.

_pidgeon:_ have u had a dna test??? no?? THATS WHAT I THOUGHT

_keef:_ AM I PURPLE?? NO??? THATS WHAT I THOUGHT

_pidgeon:_ meet me in the bridge right now lets FIGHT THIS OUT

_keef:_ Fine. I'll be right there.

_princess pop culture:_ Paladins, calm down.

_lancey boo:_ keith don't fight pidge

_hunk of love:_ lance?? being reasonable?? shook

_lancey boo:_ we all know you'll win in 2 seconds, its not fair

_hunk of love:_ never mind

_lancey boo:_ just telling the truth

_space dad:_ I'm sure they're not actually going to fight.

_everyones fave rebel:_ keith if u hurt pidge ill hurt u

_princess pop culture:_ That's cute. You're a sweet brother.

_everyones fave rebel:_ youre cute too ;))

_princess pop culture:_.. Thank you, Matt.

_space dad:_ You're both cute.

_pidgeon:_ THIS IS WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT

_everyones fave rebel:_ PIDGE! what happened??? did keith hurt you???

_pidgeon:_ lmao

_pidgeon:_ no

_hunk of love:_ what happened?

_pidgeon:_ I knocked him out

_lancey boo:_ you WHAT

_pidgeon:_ while also testing out a new weapon

_space dad:_ What?

_pidgeon:_ for a while ive been trying to come up with a weapon that is specifically tailored to hurt galra

_pidgeon:_ guess it works :)

_pidgeon:_ and my point is proven.

_lancey boo:_ PIDGE

_lancey boo:_ QUIZNAKING FIGHT ME

_lancey boo:_ RIGHT NOW

_lancey boo:_ HOW DARE YOU

_space dad:_ Pidge.. While I'm proud of you for coming up with such a thing, and it could very well be extremely helpful in our fight against the Galra...

_space dad:_ You shouldn't have used it on Keith.

_lancey boo:_ YOURE DAMN RIGHT THEY SHOULDNT HAVE

_everyones fave rebel:_ damn.. its pretty cool though

_everyones fave rebel:_ that it works. that's a breakthrough.

_pidgeon:_ thanks, matt

_pidgeon:_ but yeah.. now im calm i can see that it was a bad move//:

_lancey boo:_ wheres keith

_pidgeon:_ the bridge, still

_lancey boo:_ ill go to him

_pidgeon:_ alright

_pidgeon:_ ill apologise the second he wakes up

_space dad:_ Thank you, Pidge.

_space dad:_ But in actual fights.. That weapon will be very useful. Think you can make one for all of us?

_pidgeon:_ on it!!

_space dad:_ Of course, with a general rule of no one is allowed to use it on Keith.

_space dad:_ Just use your Bayard.

_space dad:_ that was a joke.. don't fight each other..

_hunk of love:_ you always pull through with the dad jokes in the worst times

_hunk of love:_ i love it

_space dad:_ Just trying to lighten the mood.

_hunk of love:_ it worked

_hunk of love:_ in your own, dadly way 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me? making these children deal with things? this is unheard of
> 
> honestly its abt time i make them deal with things (tho im not gonna lie i was trying to write in a joke and this is what i wrote,, the joke comes next chapter lmao and honestly is it worth it? maybe not ,, do i still like the joke?? yes)
> 
> anyway i hope yall likeD this mess of a chapter,, happier times are coming after this 
> 
> as usual, 
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps ! <3


	43. its ahappening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> keef wakes up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as promised, 2 updates this weekend to make up for missing a few weeks <33
> 
> i hope yall enjoy this! things are beginning to,, happen,,,

_keef:_ PIDGE

_hunk of love:_ keiths awake, guys

_pidgeon:_ hey.. keith...

_keef:_ DON'T HEY KEITH ME

_keef:_ WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT

_pidgeon:_ about that..

_pidgeon:_ don't get mad....

_keef:_ IM ALREADY MAD

_pidgeon:_ it was uh,,,, a weapon to hurt galra,,

_keef:_ what

_pidgeon:_ okay yeah I prefer the caps lock. lower case is scarier

_space dad:_ Keith, it's okay. I've already reprimanded Pidge.

_space dad:_ Just to let you know, I also asked them to make one of the weapons for all of us.

_space dad:_ But, I also included a rule that under no circumstances is anyone allowed to use it on you.

_keef:_ Thank you, Shiro.

_pidgeon:_ keith, once I calmed down I realised it was a baad move on my part:///

_pidgeon:_ im sorry, dude

_keef:_.. It's okay.

_lancey boo:_ if u ever try it again ull have me after u too

_pidgeon:_ I know

_pidgeon:_ keith

_pidgeon:_   I feel bad so I offer you this

_pidgeon: ..- .-.     --. .- -.--_

_keef:_ What's that?

_pidgeon:_ remorse code

_keef:_..

_keef:_ I'm more angry at that than the Galra weapon.

_pidgeon:_ love u too

_hunk of love:_ anyway

_hunk of love:_ Pidge's original point got sidetracked a bit

_lancey boo:_ good point, hunk

_lancey boo:_ who were u on abt pidge?? me n keith haven't even been overtly cute lately

_pidgeon:_ oh trust me you have

_hunk of love:_ yep

_space dad:_ You have.

_princess pop culture:_ I agree. It's nice, though.

_everyones fave rebel:_ when are u not??

_lancey boo:_ thanks guys

_pidgeon:_ welcome

_pidgeon:_ buT u three don't get to say that

_pidgeon:_ bc its _you three_ im on about

_space dad:_ What?

_princess pop culture:_ I don't understand.

_everyones fave rebel:_ I know :)

_pidgeon:_ wow matt

_lancey boo:_ oh yeah I thought that was obvious tho

_keef:_ Same. I thought they were already a thing?

_space dad:_ I.. No.. Kind of... Maybe?

_princess pop culture:_ It's complicated.

_hunk of love:_ how?

_princess pop culture:_ Well, there's three of us..

_hunk of love:_ oh sweet allura let me show you the World

_hunk of love:_ three people can all be dating each other, we call it polyamory on earth

_princess pop culture:_ Really?

_everyones fave rebel:_ I guess what that slav guy suggested doesn't sound bad..

_space dad:_ okay first we never mention slav so write that down

_space dad:_ But, I wouldn't be opposed to it.

_pidgeon:_ gross

_hunk of love:_ Maybe we should give these three some space..

_lancey boo:_ yep

_keef:_ Meet you guys at the pool?

_pidgeon:_ sounds good

_lancey boo:_ race yall there

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HERE WE GOOOOOO
> 
> now. the question is. how does it happen? i left it ambiguous here but ill obvs come back to it next chapt. so,, weve already had two matchmaking schemes so idk if yall would want that,, do i Write out a lil scene for these three dorks?? do the others get involved somehow?? honestly idk how i want them to get together dkfjksjkjd rip if yall have ideas feel free to Share 
> 
> buT YES SHALLURATT FINALLY!! be prepared for cute scenes bc they deserve it i love them
> 
> also the joke i was on abt was literally the remorse code thing lmao i found it funny. i saw it on tumblr n i believe its from incorrectvoltronquotes !! which i love honestly (p.s. yes the morse code Doe say something ;;)) )
> 
> anywaY as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps ! <3


	44. whats a title

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ;;;)))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> back at it again with shalluratt and some scheming paladins
> 
> but not in the way we've seen them before
> 
>  
> 
> also we hit 15k!!!!!!! thats so Wild to me omg !! thank u all so much, i love all of u honestly yall make my life 1000x better :'))

_lancey boo:_ sooooo ;;))

_pidgeon:_ hows it going

_hunk of love:_ how are you guys doooing

_keef:_ Anything.. Happening?

_space dad:_.. Uh..

_keef:_ Oh, come on, Shiro. It's been like half an hour!

_lancey boo:_ want me and keith to show you how it's done?

_everyones fave rebel:_ gross, no

_princess pop culture:_ We're trying to work things out.

_hunk of love:_ get a move on, then!!

 

 

_[Operation Space Parents]_

 

_pidgeon:_ remember this chat?

_pidgeon:_ I think we need it again

_keef:_ Why? We can't match make them, they already know that they like each other.

_lancey boo:_ oh keith u innocent boy

_hunk of love:_ just because we cant match make, doesn't mean we can't interfere

_pidgeon:_ indeed

_pidgeon:_ I say, we set them up on a romantic date

_hunk of love:_ yeah !! that should make them speed up with the getting together thing

_keef:_ Okay.. What do you have in mind?

_pidgeon:_ we all know coran knows all the safe planets

_keef:_ So, send them off?

_pidgeon:_ on the contrary, my dear watson

_pidgeon:_ we all go off with coran, sight seeing or something

_hunk of love:_ anything to get us off the ship for a while!

_lancey boo:_ and we leave them with a cute, star lit room set up with a picnic !!

_pidgeon:_ I like it, lance

_lancey boo:_ lead the way from each of their rooms with rose petals to the control room, that has the best view of the stars!

_keef:_ I don't think we can get rose petals, but that's cute.

_hunk of love:_ I know something similar!

_pidgeon:_ I love working as a team :'))

_pidgeon:_ okay, ill go speak to coran

_pidgeon:_ hunk, you grab the rose petals

_pidgeon:_ keith, you go and make sure matt, allura and shiro don't go anywhere near the control room

_pidgeon:_ lance, you set up the date

_hunk of love:_ got it!

_lancey boo:_ you can count on me!!

_keef:_ I'm on it.

_[Meme Dream Team]_

 

_cool uncle:_ Allura

_princess pop culture:_ Coran? It's unlike you to be on here.

_cool uncle:_ I know, but I've got a message

_princess pop culture:_ A message?

_cool uncle:_ Yes

_cool uncle:_ I'm going to take the paladins out tonight

_princess pop culture:_ Take them out? How come?

_cool uncle:_ Number 5 told me they, Keith, lance and Hunk want to see some culture

_princess pop culture:_ Okay. Have fun.

_cool uncle:_ Yep!

_space dad:_ What happened to Coran's typos?

_pidgeon:_ I realise there was an easy way to fix it

_pidgeon:_ just add spell check to his messenger

_space dad:_ Good point. Don't know why we didn't think of that before.

_pidgeon:_ shrug emoji

 

 

_[Operation Space Parents]_

 

_pidgeon:_ plans in action

_pidgeon:_ keith hows it going with you?

_keef:_ difficuly to keep an eye on all thre,e might get suspicious soon

_lancey boo:_ jeez its never not weird seeing keith type when hes multi-tasking

_lancey boo:_ but anyway, im just adding the finishing touches

_lancey boo:_ blankets on the floor by the window, the rest of the petals spread around, n me and hunk made the food

_lancey boo:_ just gotta set out the food and we'll be done! it looks great!

_pidgeon:_ niiice, ill set up some mood lighting, and then we set up the petal trail and Get Out Of Here

_hunk of love:_ alright! lance is on the trails, im taking the food

_pidgeon:_ nice, coran and I will get ready to leave

_pidgeon:_ as soon as lance and hunk are done, keith, leave

_keef:_ yep

_lancey boo:_ okay... done!

_pidgeon:_ everyone go, go, go!

 

_[Meme Dream Team]_

 

_space dad:_ Uh.. Why are there petals on the floor?

_princess pop culture:_ I see them too.. The others are up to something, aren't they?

_space dad:_ More than likely.

_everyones fave rebel:_ oh lighten up, you two. they put effort into it, lets follow the trails and see where it leads us

_everyones fave rebel:_ besides, they've gone out, right? so its not like its a prank.

_princess pop culture:_ Okay.. I hope you're right.

_space dad:_ I suppose there's no harm in it.

 

_[Operation space parents]_

 

_pidgeon:_ they've seen it! the plan is working!

_keef:_ So we've just got to spend a few hours on this planet?

_hunk of love:_ yep, they shouldn't take too long

_lancey boo:_ keith!! we could go on our own date here!!

_keef:_.. That would be nice.

_lancey boo:_ <3333 !!! see u guys later, we'll come back to you just before we leave!!

_hunk of love:_ bye !!

_pidgeon:_ they grow up so fast :'))

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okaY honestly i never intended for the shalluratt thing to be going on This Long sdfjsjfl i promise they'll get together next chaptER but this seemed like a good place to end this one bc it was gettin long
> 
> also im not sure whether or not to write out the date scene?? what would yall want?? 
> 
> ALSO ALSO !!!! THE LOVELY SIMPLYESSA WROTE OUT BOTH PIDGE & KEITH'S FIGHT SCENE AND THE FOLLOW UP KLANCE SCENE FROM TWO CHAPTERS AGO!! I DIED HONESTLY GO CHECK IT OUT !! https://archiveofourown.org/works/11432013
> 
> what a blessing :')) 
> 
> anwaY , as usuallll,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3


	45. here we go, for real

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY, some dorks get together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mmmmmm sorry !!!!!!! i didn't realise i'd be so BUSY this week!!! i've literally been out every day, with some sad personal stuff and helping out family members etc etc. SO i didn't do a week update as promised, but technically friday is still the week... right?
> 
> anyway. here we are. shalluratt is finally official. klance is cute. im hyped for season three because DAMN did yall see all that stuff from SDCC????? i was freaking out while it was all being announced and damn season 3 looks so gooood
> 
>  
> 
> anyway. enjooooy!

 The paladins all ran to their lions the second everything was in place. Keith, who was with Shiro as Pidge sent the signalling message, ended the conversation while Shiro was still talking with a 'gotta run, bye!' before running off, Lance and Hunk ran together, grins on their faces. Pidge and Coran were ready and waiting in the green lion, and in a few moments, the others were in their respective lions, and they were off. It didn't take long for them to switch from the messenger to the comms, all laughing and smiling.

 

"I can't believe we pulled that off!" Keith exclaimed.

"Right? I thought for sure someone would walk in on me and Lance cooking."

"You paladins did well, and it was quite amusing to watch." Coran added on, leaning over Pidge's seat, twirling his moustache.

"Wait, watch? You and Pidge were just chilling while we did all the work?" Lance tried to act offended, but he'd had too much fun to be genuinely hurt.

"Yep!" Pidge smirked at them all. "We thought we deserved a break."

Keith rolled his eyes, though his smile didn't wave. "I could've used some help! I had to keep running around!"

"And you should've seen their confused faces when you kept leaving and coming back." Pidge broke out into laughter once more.

"Hey! Shiro thought I was sick or something, it's not funny." His words contradicted his actions as a laugh bubbled at his lips.

"But, it was worth it!" Hunk piped in. "We did it, and now they'll be on a romantic date!"

"And we get to go sight seeing, without a life threatening mission for once." Lance grinned.

 

_[Meme Dream Team]_

 

_space dad:_ Uh.. Why are there petals on the floor?

_princess pop culture:_ I see them too.. The others are up to something, aren't they?

_space dad:_ More than likely.

_everyones fave rebel:_ oh lighten up, you two. they put effort into it, lets follow the trails and see where it leads us

_everyones fave rebel:_ besides, they've gone out, right? so its not like its a prank.

_princess pop culture:_ Okay.. I hope you're right.

_space dad:_ I suppose there's no harm in it.

 

_[Operation space parents]_

 

_pidgeon:_ they've seen it! the plan is working!

_keef:_ So we've just got to spend a few hours on this planet?

_hunk of love:_ yep, they shouldn't take too long

_lancey boo:_ keith!! we could go on our own date here!!

_keef:_.. That would be nice.

_lancey boo:_ <3333 !!! see u guys later, we'll come back to you just before we leave!!

_hunk of love:_ bye !!

_pidgeon:_ they grow up so fast :'))

 

Back on the ship, Allura and Shiro both followed the petal trails with caution. Matt, though, he skipped down the trail with a smile on his face, so he was at the control room waiting by the time Allura and Shiro reached him.

"Relax, you two, for once. They've done something nice for us, let's just enjoy it!" Matt said as they arrived, not bothering with any kind of greeting.

Allura sighed and let her shoulders relax before smiling, nodding. "You're right. There's no need to be on edge tonight."

"I guess we deserve a night off for once." Shiro agreed, and Matt grinned.

"Exactly. Now, let's see what they did."

He spun on his heels so that he was facing the door, and as it opened, his eyes widened. Shiro and Allura had similar reactions, all three of them slowly stepping inside of the room.

"Oh, wow.." Shiro breathed, taking in how different the control room looked.

"This looks amazing.."

"The paladins did a very good job with this.. It looks wonderful."

 

Lance was quick to leave his lion once he'd been given the okay for him and Keith to go off on their own. They'd been dating for a while now, but had yet to go on a proper date, being in space and all. So, naturally, he was leaping at this chance. The second Keith had left Red and both lions' particle barriers went up, Lance took Keith's hand in his own and, with an excitable smile, started running down the streets. The planet they'd came to is one that managed to stay Galra free for all 10,000 years, so they had built up a respectable city life. It reminded Lance of Earth, despite all of the differing species of aliens covering the streets, and that was just one of the reasons he was glad this was the place of his and Keith's first official date.

Keith was taken by surprise at Lance's immediate take off, but he happily ran along with him, a smile spread across his face. Being with Lance wherever made him happy, but he couldn't deny that it was nice to finally do something official. The two manoeuvred their way through the crowds, barely giving themselves time to take in the city life buzzing around them. Many different voices could be heard, most in languages neither Lance nor Keith could understand. Bright, neon lights hung above pretty much every building or attraction, lining the streets and illuminating them in a warm glow.

It wasn't long before Lance finally slowed down, stopping in the middle of one of the roads to take it all in. Keith stumbled to a stop, too, and both of them glanced around to realise what a beautiful city they were in.

"Wow." Keith practically whispered, smile unwavering.

"It looks like space Vegas, or something! I love it!" Lance was practically bouncing in place with excitement.  

"Yeah," Keith laughed softly as he admired Lance. "Wanna keep looking around?"

"Definitely." Lance nodded, squeezing Keith's hand slightly as they began walking again.

 

Allura, Shiro and Matt were all sat on the blankets set out for them, close together and all looking out at the stars surrounding the ship. It was a very peaceful sight, and the three were laughing and joking together while they ate the spread of food Hunk and Lance had prepared. The three were enjoying each others company immensely, since they never really got this kind of alone time, whether that be due to some kind of fight, paladins or Galra, or just being busy being the defenders of the universe. They couldn't help but feel grateful to the others for setting this up for them.

"We should definitely thank the others when they're back. This was sweet." Shiro smiled.

"I agree. Though I'm sure it was just because _they_  wanted to a night off too, and needed an excuse." Allura laughed a little.

"Oh, give them a break. They work hard, right? And now we're all getting a night off. I think it worked out pretty nicely." Matt smirked, happily digging into the food laid out.

With nods of agreement and smiles all round, Shiro and Allura also began to eat. Shiro and Matt were thinking the same: Hunk must be the space equivalent of Gordon Ramsey, because, damn, this food was good. Allura was of course having similar thoughts, just without the Earth pop culture. However, even with the silence being perfectly comfortable, they all knew that they were here for a reason.

"Soo," Matt begun. "Are we going to talk it out?"

"I guess we should. That was the real purpose of all this." Shiro answered with a nodd.

"Alright... Well, I think that the suggestion Hunk made sounds.. Nice." 

"The one about polyamory?" Matt's gaze flickered between the two of them.

Allura nodded. "That's it. What do you two think?"

"I.. agree." Shiro gave a soft smile. "I really like both of you, so it would be my ideal solution."

"Shiro, you big dork." Matt rolled his eyes playfully, a smile pulling at his lips.  "It's not an ideal solution, it's a very realistic and  _perfect_ solution."

Allura felt a warmth in her chest. "So, we've come to a conclusion. We will all date."

"Allura! No need to be so formal about it!" Matt burst out into laughter, and Shiro and Allura couldn't help but join in; it was contagious.

After a moment of the three of them laughing together, Shiro managed to calm down. "Okay, okay, I'll give it a try."

"Matt, will you be my boyfriend?" 

"Have been for the past year or so, you idiot." He winked. "Of course I will." 

Shiro smiled, placing a quick kiss on his cheek before turning to face Allura. "Princess, will you be my girlfriend?"

With a smirk on her face, she replied. "I have been for the past few weeks. Of course I will." 

"Great," Shiro gave a feigned sigh of exasperation. "Somehow, I ended up with the two biggest losers in the whole galaxy." 

"Rude!" Matt lightly hit Shiro's arm, though there was no malice in the action.

"You didn't let me finish!" Shiro gave a smirk of his own. "I wouldn't have it any other way." 

"And you call us the losers." Allura added in. 

"Nice one, Allura." Matt smiled over at her, before pausing for a second.

"Wait," He looked back at Shiro. "We're both dating you.. but it's not complete, yet." And then his gaze was back on Allura. "Will you be my girlfriend, Allura?"

"Of course."  

 

Keith and Lance travelled around the city for a while, wandering around different shops and building, and around a few parks. They didn't have any of the planets currency, naturally, but they didn't care for buying things. They were happy just to spend the time with each other, having a good time and seeing the kind of things they never even dreamt they'd get to see. But, as the saying goes, time flies when you're having fun. Without them noticing, it had begun to get dark, the lighting of the streets now being the only source of light, meaning the few hours they were going to stay here had passed.

"We should get back to the others." Keith stated, and with a nod from Lance, they turned around to walk back to their lions.

Only.. They couldn't figure out which way they'd came from. They looked down a few of the differing streets, but none stuck out as a way they remembered coming.

"I think we're lost." Lance sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"We came here in giant, mecha robot lions that no one else has. How did we manage to lose them?"

"I don't know, it is a big city." Lance took another glance around. "But we're not in armour, and I left my messenger in Blue.."

"Wait." A small smile appeared on Keith's face. "I know how I can get Red over here."

Lance shot a confused glance at Keith as he let go of his hand and walked over towards a wall, and subsequently kicked it. Lance was about to question Keith, before a large gust of wind flew over the street, causing Lance, along with everyone else, to look up and see the Red Lion, in a defensive pose, ready to attack the whole damn city. However, Keith managed to calm her with a wave to let her know he was okay.

Lance rolled his eyes, a smile on his face at the situation. He would've laughed, but then he looked around and noticed everyone looking confused and scared, while some were whispering to each other, pointing, and some even screamed. Right. They'd both forgotten that since this planet was Galra-free, they wouldn't need to know about Voltron, either.

Lance jumped onto the closest table, cupping his hands around his mouth to get everyone's attention. "It's alright, everyone!"

Once all of the worried gazes turned towards him, he continued. "This is one out of five lions of Voltron, we're super cool - we're defenders of the universe. Don't worry about it now, but if you ever need help, call for Voltron and you'll see us, and this lion, again! Adios!"

Once he was down, he took Keith's hand once again, and the two of them ran into the closest building, up the stairs onto the roof, and got into Red with one final wave to the crowds.  
  
And once they were in, they both burst out into laughter.

"You _stubbed your toe_ , and Red came swooping to your defence?" Lance asked through his laughter.

Once Keith calmed down, he nodded. "Yeah, she's a little protective."

"A little?" Lance laughed again. "Dude, she was about to kill everyone in that city!"

"Whatever, you can't say it wasn't helpful." Keith smirked, running his hand across the dashboard in thanks to Red.

The two flew back to where the others were waiting, and Lance hopped out of Red and into his own lion.

"Where were you two?" Pidge asked over the comms. "We've been waiting for like, an hour!"

"We got a bit lost," Keith answered. "But Red found us."

"Yeah, because-"

"Lance!" Keith cut him off.

"We don't need to know what dirty things you two got up to, thanks!" Coran piped in. "There are innocent ears listening!"

"Innocent- what?" Pidge questioned, and then Coran placed his hand over their ears.

"They're too young to know!" Coran smirked, causing everyone but Pidge to laugh.

"I'm, like, a year younger than them!" Pidge huffed, shoving Coran's hands away.

"Shh, Pidge, it's alright." Hunk added on. "We're just trying to protect you!"

"Let's just get back to the castle." Pidge grumbled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so i went a bit klance heavy here im SORRY but im so much more comfortable with writing them sdkjs
> 
> one of my weaknesses as a writer is scenes with more than two characters dfkjdf so writing out the shalluratt date scene was HARD especially as im probably weakest at writing shiro and allura, and i feel //: writing matt since we dont have much to go by lmao
> 
> STILL i hope yall liked it, and the wait was worth it!
> 
> (i hope u liked me including some crack in there as well with red ready to kill everyone over keith stubbing his toe dkfjdkj)
> 
> ... also i wanna bring lotor back bc im kinda in love with him, plus his va seems real sweet 
> 
> anywaaay, as usual,,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps! <3


	46. theyre back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the paladins return from their trip, pidge has a revelation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO IM SO SORRY FOR MY ABSENCE I LITERALLY DO NOT KNOW WHERE TIME IS GOING ITS MOVING TOO FAST AAAAAAA 
> 
> anyway yes. i have a chapter now. hello. how are you all. im CRYING OVER SEASON 3 - BOY WHAT A SEASON !!!!!! i loved it with my whole heart, and uh, watch this space for a season 3 chapter 
> 
> for now, have this!
> 
> (EDIT, PS, THING : IM USING A LOOPHOLE TO UPLOAD THIS FROM MY HOME WIFI WHICH USUALLY BLOCKS AO3 BUT BC OF THIS, THE FORMATTING OF THE WEBSITE IS A LIL STRANGE (im using the streaming site rabbit bc its not blocked on here who knows, so essentially im using a browser inside of a browser, it throws it off a bit) SO SORRY IF THE FORMATTING OF THE CHAPTER IS WEIRD - ILL FIX IT WHEN I CAN)

_lancey boo:_ we're back

 _pidgeon:_ is it like,, safe to go in the control room

 _princess pop culture:_ Paladins, welcome back!

 _everyones fave rebel:_ nope not safe

 _everyones fave rebel:_ shield ur eyes, young one

 _pidgeon:_ oh my GOD im going to quiznaking fight you all

 _space dad:_ Don't worry, Pidge, it is safe.

 _princess pop culture:_ Yes, Shiro's right.

 _princess pop culture:_ Also! I would like to thank you all for setting up that date for us.

 _hunk of love:_ no problem, princess!

 _keef_ : But.. Did it work?

 _everyones fave rebel:_ hell YEAH it did

 _space dad:_ Yeah. We're all officially together now.

 _hunk of love:_ AWWW

 _lancey boo:_ finally!!!!!!!!

 _pidgeon:_ cute

 _princess pop culture:_ Thank you, all.

 _lancey boo:_ so does this make matt a space dad too

 _hunk of love:_ definitely

 _pidgeon:_ wait

 _pidgeon:_ if matts a space dad....

 _pidgeon:_ keith

 _pidgeon:_ i just realised something

 _keef:_ Yeah?

 _pidgeon:_ with shiro and matt dating....

 _pidgeon:_ were siblings

 _keef:_ So we are.

 _pidgeon:_ wow couldn't u have been at least a little more enthusiastic

 _keef:_ *WOW PIDGE I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE SIBLINGS, THIS IS THE ONLY THING IVE EVER WANTED I COULDN'T BE HAPPIER.

 _pidgeon:_ that's better thank you

 _lancey boo:_ this is wild

 _lancey boo:_ we have three space parents

 _lancey boo:_ and ive gained a sibling in law, too

 _keef:_ But we're not married, Lance.

 _lancey boo:_ not yet

 _keef:_ :'))

 _hunk of love:_ surely if matts a space dad he needs a new nickname

 _pidgeon:_ yeah, but i cant be space dad otherwise we'll be confused

 _lancey boo:_ got it

_[lancey boo changed everyones fave rebel's nickname to space daddy]_

_space daddy:_ im okay with this

 _princess pop culture:_ So am I.

 _hunk of love_ : ALLURA, THERES YOUNG CHILDREN HERE

 _princess pop culture:_ You're right. Sorry, Pidge.

 _pidgeon:_ i hate all of you

_[space dad left the chat]_

_keef_ : Wow, he could've just said he didn't like Lance's nickname choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> shiro,,, u okay buddy
> 
>  
> 
> hope yall liked that !!!! space daddy matt confirmed by both me and *LOOK AWAY SPOILER* that korean trailer ;;)) *OKAY SPOILER OVER* 
> 
> also *OH NO ANOTHER SEASON 3 SPOILER SORRY* im cryin, aus and space phones are canon so guess what,, somewhere in the voltron universe this fic is completely canon. ur welcome. *OTHER SPOILER OVER!!!*
> 
> i have like ,, nothing to say except i have a thing planned for next chapter which im About To Write so ,, i might upload it asap 
> 
> anyway as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <33


	47. shiro?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> well, shiros back
> 
> kind of

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY YES THIS CHAPTER HAS A FEW SPOILERS SO I WOULDNT ADVISE READING UNLESS YOU'VE WATCHED SEASON 3!!!!!!!!!
> 
>  
> 
> but hello, as promised, im uploading again bc i felt bad for not uploading for a while, and wow, this chapter ended up being a lot longer (and... more confusing) than i thought it would be, so uh, enjoy !!

_keef:_ But in all seriousness, why did Shiro leave?

_princess pop culture:_ I.. Do not know.

_keef:_ I'll go speak to him.

_lancey boo:_ do u think it was rly my nickname for matt:((

_space daddy:_ nah

_pidgeon:_ hes never had a problem with nicknames before right?

_keef:_ Okay.. I can't find him anywhere in the castle.

_pidgeon:_ that was a fast check

_keef:_ I am fast

_lancey boo:_ not in my experience ;;)))

_hunk of love:_ since shiro isn't here

_hunk of love:_ LANCE.

_lancey boo:_ not the same, but u tried buddy, u tried

_keef:_ I'll just add him back to the chat.

_[keef added space dad to the chat]_

_space dad:_ Sorry guys. Chat glitched, haha. :)

_keef:_ No problem... Where are you?

_space dad:_ I just went to get a drink!

_keef:_ I checked the whole castle, I didn't see you.

_space dad:_ I must've been accidentally avoiding you.

_keef:_ Right. Well, you're back now, so it's fine.

_space dad:_ Exactly!

_lancey boo:_ shiro did u leave bc of my nickname for matt

_space dad:_ What do you mean?

_lancey boo:_ I called him space daddy remember?

_space dad:_ I don't mind about that! I didn't leave, it was a glitch :)

_pidgeon:_ the chats never glitched before but okay

_space dad:_ It was a glitch.

_space dad:_ :)

_princess pop culture:_ Shiro.. Are you okay?

_pidgeon:_ yeah, you seem off

_space dad:_ I'm fine, guys.

_space dad:_ Lucky to have my friends looking out for me though!

_hunk of love:_ ...  _all_ of us are your friends?

_space dad:_ Yeah! You're all my friends. :)

_hunk of love:_ FRIENDS. Just friends?

_space dad:_.. Yeah.

_princess pop culture:_ Wait, who exactly are just your friends?

_space dad:_ All of you! Keith, the other one, the .. other one, the..... um, the other one, Allura?, and um, the ... space other one

_space daddy:_ so whos the new guy in the chat

_keef:_ There's no one _new_. I just added Shiro back

_space daddy:_ yeah - no

_space daddy:_ that's not shiro

_space dad:_ I don't know what you mean! Of course I'm me! haha form voltron! ill form the head!

_keef:_ Okay yeah I see it now

_keef:_ Who are you and what did you do with Shiro

_lancey boo:_ :O A SHIRO IMPOSTER :O

_space dad:_ You're all crazy! I'm me!

_pidgeon:_ someone else is trying to get into the chat.

_hunk of love:_ add them, it could be the real shiro!

_[pidgeon added sven to the chat]_

_sven:_ YOO-HOO

_sven:_ HOW ARE YOU ALL DOING ON THIS FINE EVE

_lancey boo:_ oh my god its other reality shiro

_lancey boo:_ I love him

_lancey boo:_ did you get to the space hospital alright?

_sven:_ OF COURSE I DID! IT WAS THE REALITY WHERE EVERYTHING WORKS OUT FINE!

_hunk of love:_ that's so good to hear buddy :'))

_lancey boo:_ god bless that reality.

_keef:_ Okay now I'm confused. We have some kind of fake Shiro, and.. Sven.

_princess pop culture:_ But where's the real Shiro?

_space dad:_ I'm no fake! Vol... Tron.... amiright?

_pidgeon:_ im going to delete this chat

_pidgeon:_ someone _else_ is trying to get in

_space daddy:_ oh my god who now

_pidgeon:_ lets find out

_[pidgeon added kuro to the chat]_

_kuro:_ I literally want to kill all of you.

_keef:_ Wait.. No.. I know who this is

_kuro:_ big claps for the smart paladin.

_princess pop culture:_ Who is it, Keith?

_keef:_ When Shiro fought Haggar, she created an evil, Galra kind of illusion of him.. I didn't realise he was real.

_hunk of love:_ so now we're up to 3 shiros?? but not one of them is the real one??

_space dad:_ I KEEP TELLING YOU, I'M THE REAL SHIRO. COME ON TEAM LETS DO THE VOLTRON THING.

_lancey boo:_ can it buzz lightyear we're busy

_space daddy:_ lmao buzz lightyear nice one lance

_lancey boo:_ thanks matt

_pidgeon:_ oh my GOD

_hunk of love:_ someone else? who else could it be?

_pidgeon:_ I literally do not care at this point

_[pidgeon added Takashi to the chat]_

_keef:_ Takashi.. That's more promising.

_Takashi:_ Guys. Someone who.. Looked like me stole my messenger and fought me. It seems.. I have an imposter.

_lancey boo:_ NO KIDDING, SHIRO

_space daddy:_ hey shiro

_Takashi:_ Is that the imposter?

_space daddy:_ um RUDE I was the one who could tell it wasn't you

_Takashi:_ Oh, Matt. Sorry, I didn't know your nickname was changed.

_lancey boo:_ but.. do you like it?

_Takashi:_ Yeah, it's funny.

_lancey boo:_ NICE

_keef:_ GUYS. More pressing matter at hand, remember? The 3 other Shiros?

_Takashi:_ What.

_keef:_ Oh, right

_keef:_ There's the imposter, then Sven joined the chat, then.. Kuro.

_Takashi:_ Okay, imposter and Kuro, but.. Who's Sven?

_lancey boo:_ Alternate reality you! He has a cool accent!

_pidgeon:_ and hes practically married to Slav

_Takashi:_ he what

_sven:_ YOO HOO, OTHER ME!

_Takashi:_ Why are you friends with Slav

_sven:_ HES MY BUDDY I LOVE HIM!

_Takashi:_ Nope don't accept it.

_kuro:_ nice little reunion, guys

_kuro:_ still want to kill all of you

_Takashi:_ I don't like this.

_space dad:_ I'M THE REAL SHIRO! KILL HIM!

_lancey boo:_ first off, who said anything about killing anyone

_keef:_ And second, the _real_ Shiro would never pass up an opportunity to die.

_Takashi:_ I mean, you're not wrong.

_princess pop culture:_ So.. What do we do about the other Shiros? Surely we can't just let them roam the universe?

_hunk of love:_ well, we can with sven, as long as he stays in his reality

_Takashi:_ And stops being friends with Slav.

_hunk of love:_ yeah sure

_hunk of love:_ but with kuro and the imposter.. I guess we have to do something.

_keef:_ Great. Looks like we're going on a 'kill the Shiro imposters' mission.

_Takashi:_ god I wish that were me

_space daddy:_ shiro u okay

_Takashi:_ no.

_keef:_ Anyway, I guess we should kick them out of the chat as our first move, so they can't see what we're saying.

_pidgeon:_ thank god

_[pidgeon removed kuro and space dad from the chat]_

_pidgeon:_ sven deserves a good bye

_lancey boo:_ BYE, SVEN. WE LOVE YOU AND WE MISS YOU <333

_hunk of love:_ say hi to slav for us! we'll miss you!!

_keef:_ See ya, Sven. It was nice meeting you.

_sven:_ GOODBYE EVERYBODY, I LOVE YOU ALL TOO. I'LL MISS YOU!

_pidgeon:_ bye sven!!

_[pidgeon removed sven from the chat]_

_princess pop culture:_ That's better, now we only have the _true_ Shiro.

_lancey boo:_ gotta get his nickname back though!!

_[lancey boo changed Takashi's nickname to space dad]_

_space dad:_ That's better. I.. Can't believe there's so many mes out there.

_keef:_ And now we've got to get rid of them. Let's go, team. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YES I 100% SUPPORT THE 'SHIRO IS A CLONE' THEORY, BOY IS A GODDAMN CLONE
> 
> anyway dfghsdkj this chapter was a big mess of shiros, but i hope u liked it anyway
> 
> shoutout to josh keaton for being so talented that he can voice like 10 versions of the same character lmao, go u, dude
> 
> honestly,, svens cameo,,, killed me,, i loved it So Much edfkjsjfkj what a Boy,, yoo hoo
> 
> i wanna make more season 3 jokes but,,, should i,,,, (also YALL CAN WE TALK ABOUT THE AMOUNT OF KLANCE I SCREAMED AND CRIED SO MUCH??)
> 
> as usual, 
> 
> comments and kudos would be appreciated!!<3


	48. keith.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> idk anymore man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yeah hi im a Mess ! i give up with having an upload schedule yall have just gotta deal with me again lmaoo 
> 
> i also give up with titling and summaries oh well its all a mess here why do yall still Read this trash,, (i call it trash but,, i love it so much,, and i love u guys,,, so much)
> 
> anyway i started writing some other chapter but then some cool info from the paladins guidebook was released and i just Had to make some jokes about that too lmao, so have this mess
> 
> (yes i know its Now been said that,, its not canon but idc i like this chapter fight me)

_lancey boo:_ can u believe keith is an adult

_pidgeon:_ no

_hunk of love:_ no

_space daddy:_ no

_space dad:_ no

_princess pop culture:_ no

_cool uncle:_ no

_keef:_.. Thanks, guys. THANKS.

_lancey boo:_ point proven, go do ur taxes old man

_keef:_ Whatever, Lancey Lance.

_lancey boo:_ I happen to like my name

_pidgeon:_ why.. isn't ur name lancey lance its too good

_lancey boo:_ I also like lancey boo but okay

_[lancey boo changed their own nickname to lancey lance]_

_lancey lance:_ happy now?

_keef:_ I'm never happy.

_lancey lance:_ not wrong

_pidgeon:_ anyway ive come to a conclusion

_hunk of love:_ ooh I wanna hear

_pidgeon:_ okay so lances fave animal is sharks right?

_lancey lance:_ correct. sharks are cool

_pidgeon:_ and keith is the paladin of fire n stuff right?

_keef:_ I mean.. technically not anymore

_pidgeon:_ shut up u still wear the red suit

_pidgeon:_ so....

_pidgeon:_ keith and lance are...

_pidgeon:_ sharkboy and lavagirl.

_[keef removed pidgeon from the chat]_

_pidgeon:_ I dont know why u think that will ever work

_keef:_ I don't care if it works, I'm making a point.

_pidgeon:_ a redundant point sure

_lancey lance:_ okay keith dont break up with me

_lancey lance:_ but that was kinda funny

_[keef left the group chat]_

_lancey lance:_ :((

_pidgeon:_ lmao rip

_lancey lance:_ okay but while he cant stop me I have an Observation

_lancey lance:_ keith is a shark

_hunk of love:_ explain

_lancey lance:_ everyone thinks hes all Angery and Dangerous n like yeah,,, he _could_ attack u

_lancey lance:_ but in most cases he wont and also hes actually v soft n gentle n sweet

_hunk of love:_ u know... I didn't believe u but now I do

_lancey lance:_ glad I turned u into a Believer of the keith/shark conspiracy

_[pidgeon added keef to the group chat]_

_pidgeon:_ SUP sharkboy!

_keef:_ what.

_keef:_ Oh my god, Lance..

_lancey lance:_ IT'S THE TRUTH, KEITH

_space daddy:_ ill back lance up here I can believe that

_lancey lance:_ THANK YOU, MATT

_space daddy:_ and I feel like this is my proper initiation into the meme team..

_[space daddy changed keef's nickname to sharkboy]_

_sharkboy:_ I hate all of you.

_space dad:_ Wait... Why is Keith's name sharkboy?

_lancey lance:_ well u see

_space dad:_ Sharks aren't even his favourite animal... Hippos are.

_lancey lance:_ ive come to the conclusion that - WAIT WHAT

_lancey lance:_ OH MY GOD KEITH WHY DID YOU NEVER TELL ME THIS

_pidgeon:_ KEITH LOVES HIPPOS IM DYING THATS SO PURE

_hunk of love:_ you would've thought.. tigers, or lions, something ferocious ..

_hunk of love:_ but no

_hunk of love:_   HIPPOS

_sharkboy:_ shiro we're no longer brothers I have disowned you

_space dad:_ Oh don't be mean, I thought everyone knew about how much you wuv hippos

_hunk of love:_ keith I want to make you a tshirt that says I wuv hippos

_sharkboy:_ You dare, and you're out of Voltron.

_hunk of love:_ you cant kick me out

_sharkboy:_ I am the black paladin now...

_hunk of love:_ shiro tell him he cant kick me out

_space dad:_ I don't think he's going to listen to me right now.

_hunk of love:_ allura?!?!

_princess pop culture:_ Of course he can't kick you out, Hunk.

_shakrboy:_ Fine, you're both out.

_princess pop culture:_ Keith.. what

_princess pop culture:_ I'm the Princess _and_ the blue paladin. You can't kick me out, or Hunk.

_sharkboy:_ Uh you're not the princess of Voltron so guess what black paladin overrules blue and yellow

_sharkboy:_ Anyone else wanna say anything?

_pidgeon:_... Hippoboy and lavagirl

_sharkboy:_ Fired.

_sharkboy:_ Lance?

_lancey lance:_ keith have I told you today that I love you

_lancey lance:_ because I love you

_sharkboy:_ Love you too. <33 I'd never kick you out anyway

_lancey lance:_ :'))

_pidgeon:_ THATS NOT FAIR, CANOODLING IS GOING ON !!

_sharkboy:_ yep but guess WHAT I'm the black paladin I can do whatever I want.

_sharkboy:_ Matt, Coran, welcome to team Voltron. Maybe we should enlist Slav, too...

_hunk of love:_ shiro, u really thought it was a good idea to let keith lead?

_space dad:_ Seemed like a good idea at the time...

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in my heart, keith loves hippos. lauren and joaquim can fight me, boy loves hippos.... 
> 
> sdfjsd anyway wow i cant believe voltron is now keith, lance, matt, coran, and slav.. who do u thinks gonna pilot what
> 
> (u know,, i have a strange idea in my head,, which is that discord is a popular thing right now and i genuinely love all of yall,, what if i,, did the thing and made one,, for us,, yell at me if u dont think that would work but u know, options there)
> 
> anyway anyway, hope yall enjoyed this MESS!! i dont really have much else to say wow
> 
> as usuaaaal,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!!<3


	49. vore

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> blame the space fam

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao okay this is A Mess
> 
> i just wanna say bless all of yall who joined the discord its literally so fun and i somehow adopted u all (we even did a reading of this fic lmao best experience 10/10) 
> 
> (if you havent already joined the discord n u want to, hmu and ill give u the link!!) 
> 
> ur all so amazing so this chapter goes out to u space fam <33

_pidgeon:_ day one of being kicked out of voltron

_pidgeon:_ keith still sucks

_sharkboy:_ :)

_pidgeon:_ lmao u know green still responds to me right

_hunk of love:_ same with yellow

_princess pop culture:_ Blue still responds to me, too.

_sharkboy:_ Okay I... didn't think about that.

_sharkboy:_ You're all still fired though.

_lancey lance:_ wow u know what I love? not being kicked out of voltron

_pidgeon:_ that's cool

_pidgeon:_ wanna know what I love?

_pidgeon:_ not being kicked out by my lion :)

_lancey lance:_.....

_sharkboy:_ At least Lance can pilot more than one lion.

_lancey lance:_ HA

_space dad:_ Keith, why don't you just let everyone back into Voltron and you'll all stop fighting.

_pidgeon:_ ur really going along with this like hes actually kicked us out huh

_space dad:_.. Shush.

_sharkboy:_ No. You're all banned.

_lancey lance:_ the new voltron is better anyway

_space daddy:_ I agree bc im actually included in it

_pidgeon:_ yeah as a REPLACEMENT

_space daddy:_ ur just mad bc im better I get it

_hunk of love:_ keith can we please come back to voltron..

_hunk of love:_ lets not fight </33

_sharkboy:_ ...

_lancey lance:_ maybe we should let them back in

_sharkboy:_ Fine. But you're all on thin ice.

_pidgeon:_ okay guys who's ready for the coup

_sharkboy:_..

_pidgeon:_ just messing with ya, hippo boy

_sharkboy:_ So, ignoring Pidge, you're all back in.

_pidgeon:_ HEY.

_space daddy:_ wow... u chucked me out so quick </33

_space daddy:_ how will me and coran ever forgive you

_lancey lance:_ coran probably doesn't even know this happened

_space daddy:_ we'll just make our own voltron..

_sharkboy:_ I wish you luck.

_pidgeon:_ well

_pidgeon:_ I hate keith so let's move the conversation on quickly.

_pidgeon:_  so..vore. thoughts?

_space daddy:_ OH GOD _NO_

_space daddy:_ VORE GIVES ME FLASHBACKS WHY WOULD YOU

_lancey lance:_ vore is more ;)

_sharkboy:_ What?

_pidgeon:_ oh right are we going to have to explain this to the Clueless Brothers

_space dad:_ Count me out. I know what vore is.

_pidgeon:_ you... what

_hunk of love:_ how does shiro know about vore

_lancey lance:_ he doesnt know memes but he knows VORE

_hunk of love:_ wait.. shiro knows vore.. matt is disgusted by vore...

_space daddy:_ MY TIM E TO LEAVE GOODBYE

_pidgeon:_ I..

_pidgeon:_ no....

_space dad:_ Vore isn't all bad.

_lancey lance:_ look shiro I don't wanna know what you get up to with matt apparently

_pidgeon:_ I NEED TO BLEACH MY EYES

_lancey lance:_ but consider this: we all get vored whenever we go into our lions.

_pidgeon:_ and now im cured thank u lance

_pidgeon:_ were all children of vore

_hunk of love:_.... oh my god... beautiful...

_sharkboy:_ What's??? Vore???

_lancey lance:_ ill show u later ;)))

_sharkboy:_ I'm afraid.

_lancey lance:_ yeah you probably should be

_space daddy:_ LMAO YOU ALL GET VORED

_space daddy:_ nvm I don't want to be a part of voltron anymore

_space daddy:_ Ive already had a vore experience thanks ;))

_space dad:_ And liked it.

_space daddy:_ TAKASHI SHIROGANE MY SIBLING IS IN THIS CHAT

_space dad:_ Yep, and they started it.

_pidgeon:_ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

_pidgeon:_ KEITH PLEASE KICK ME OUT OF VOLTRON AGAIN I WANT TO LEAVE

_sharkboy:_ Hm... Nope. You're back in for good, bestie! :) <3

_pidgeon:_ then I quit

_sharkboy:_ No quitting allowed. :(

_pidgeon:_ keith,,,, why do u hate me

_sharkboy:_ Wow I sure do wonder.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> VORE IS MORE
> 
> for some reason,,, everything we do in the discord comes back to vore, so theres that. vore. lmao yes this was a big mess but u kno,, everything in this is a mess so Whats New !! 
> 
> i have,, not much else to say lmao but as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3


	50. Chapter 50

_sharkboy:_ Seriously, what's vore?

 _lancey lance:_ its how the cool kids eat


	51. shiro and the shiros

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> yall didnt think id forget about the shiros did u

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay this was supposed to go up after the shiro chapter before but i got caught up with the vore 
> 
> (that rhymed,, a beautiful poem,,,)
> 
> so here we GO bois ,, a mess,,,

_[space dad created a chat and added kuro, sven, and slav]_

_kuro:_ what do you want

_space dad:_ they cant kill me! im the real shiro!!

_kuro:_ ooh so ur not real shiro, ur operation kuron. nice.

_space dad:_ I AM the real shiro!

_kuro:_ buddy.. let it go...

_sven:_ YOO HOO

_sven:_ AWW YOU ADDED MY BUDDY SLAV, SLAV HOW ARE YOU

_slav:_ I'm well!! we're still in the good reality remember

_sven:_ OOH YA I FORGOT

_kuro:_ out of all of you I hate Cheery Shiro the most

_sven:_ JUST TRYING TO LIGHTEN THE MOOD

_kuro:_ right.. anyway

_kuro:_ while kuron is having a breakdown over realising hes not the real shiro..

_[kuro changed space dad's nickname to operation clone]_

_kuro:_ operation kuron would've been too close to my name.

 

_[meme dream team]_

_lancey lance:_ allura hows blue

_lancey lance:_ I miss her :((

_princess pop culture:_ She's doing well.

_lancey lance:_ has she said anything about me

_princess pop culture:_ I'm.. Afraid not. But I'm sure she won't hold this grudge forever.

_lancey lance:_ :((

_sharkboy:_ I know you're upset over Blue, but you better not be neglecting Red because of that.

_lancey lance:_ :o how dare you I would never

_lancey lance:_ red loves me more than u so ha

_sharkboy:_ Sure.. So if I called to her she wouldn't come running?

_lancey lance:_.... don't do that

_sharkboy:_ Thought not.

_lancey lance:_ well shes told me some interesting things anyway ;;;;))

_sharkboy:_... what

_lancey lance:_ :)

_sharkboy:_ what did she tell you lance

_lancey lance:_ o u know.. just that u were pining over me from the start...

_lancey lance:_.. keith?

_lancey lance:_ keith where'd u go

_lancey lance:_  I was joking my man

_pidgeon:_ lmao imagine having to lose ur lion glad I cant relate right hunk

_hunk of love:_ so glad

_lancey lance:_ oh shut up yall wanted to pilot black too

_hunk of love:_ uh I didn't actually

_lancey lance:_ okay fair

_space dad:_ imagine actually having a lion... sad I cant relate

_space daddy:_ that's bc black cant tell if ur a clone or not lmao

_space daddy:_ too many shiros gets confusing

_pidgeon:_ anyway why is keith yelling at red

_lancey lance:_ whoops

_lancey lance:_ whats he saying

_pidgeon:_ uh.. things along the lines of 'I TRUSTED YOU!!'

_lancey lance:_ ...  :o

_lancey lance:_ does that mean he really was pining over me

_hunk of love:_ you two are oblivious even now

_hunk of love:_ YES and you were pining over him too

_lancey lance:_ ... not true

_pidgeon:_ very true

_hunk of love:_ gods honest truth

_space dad:_ You were pining, Lance.

_princess pop culture:_ I'm not sure what you mean.. But it was obvious you liked Keith.

_space daddy:_ I wasn't even there but yeah u were pining

_lancey lance:_ all of u shut up

_sharkboy:_ Lance, Red didn't tell you anything, you lied.

_lancey lance:_ yeah I know

_sharkboy:_ Rude. I yelled at her for nothing,

_lancey lance:_ lmao how'd she take that

_sharkboy:_ Uh.. You might.. have to keep her for a while longer..

_pidgeon:_ wow klance have both hurt their lions

_pidgeon:_ lmao get REKT yall

_pidgeon:_ unlike yall I actually have a bond with green:'))

 

[??]

 

_operation clone:_ wow.. im really not shiro am I...

_kuro:_ there we go. let it out buddy.

_operation clone:_ what... do I do now

_kuro:_ join us

_sven:_ :O I JUST REALISED SHIRO ISNT HERE

_sven:_ HOW IS THIS A SHIRO CHAT WITHOUT SHIRO

_kuro:_ no one said it was a shiro chat don't you dare

_[sven added space dad to the chat]_

_kuro:_ you added him.

_space dad:_ What.... is going on here?

_sven:_ OH MY GOD

_sven:_ WE'RE SHIRO AND THE SHIROS

_[sven changed the group chat name to shiro and the shiros]_

_slav:_ so many shiros. there was only a 33% chance we'd all be talking like this..

_slav:_ but 5% chance too that it would have ended in murder...

_slav:_ 45% chance it still could, actually.... more likely now than before...

_space dad:_ God... Why

_sven:_ WAIT SHIRO ITS OKAY ILL ADD YOUR SLAV HERE TOO

_space dad:_ PLEASE DONT

_[sven added slav]_

_[sven changed slav's nickname to shlav]_

_sven:_ TOO LATE YOO HOO OTHER SLAV

_sven:_ I MADE HIS NAME SHLAV SO WE KNOW HES SHIROS SLAV

_slav:_ oh.. oh dear theres now a 77% chance this will end in murder...

_shlav:_ I think you mean 89% chance, because you have to account for the _two_ of us

_slav:_ oh yes yes youre right thank you

_space dad:_ This.. is my nightmare. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pray for shiro
> 
> lmao why is this fic the biggest mess there is,,,,
> 
> i am running out of things to Say in these notes now i talk to a lot of you in the discord lmao,, (hmu for a link if u want to join!)
> 
> as usual,,
> 
> comments n kudos would make me v haps!! <3


	52. a year !!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> its the 16th of september yall:'))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> no this is not a proper update lol Sorry !! 
> 
> trust me, there's an update on its way and im SUPER excited for it,, bc something exciting is happening:')) so look out for that !! its worth the wait 100% 
> 
> anyway feel free not to read this is just me being an absolute sap

it's the 16th of September !!!! a year ago today I uploaded the first (and by first, im pretty sure I mean first 3) chapters of team voltron texting! this meme of a fic has been going on for a whole year now and im just:'))

yall have been the best. honestly. your constant support means more than I could ever put into words !! I know this is just a dumb texting fic but Ive still had so many doubts about it, and about myself lol but you guys are always so lovely and supportive and really keep me going! there's so many of yalls comments I could recite on the spot bc they mean so much to me that they just _stick_ in my mind (in the best way), and I can tell you that every single one of yalls comments has brought a smile to my face. yall pull through with sweet as heck comments when I need them most, and they leave me beaming over them the whole day lmao

again, while this definitely isn't the best fic on ao3, I love it to pieces. ive wanted to quit a few times, but im glad I never did. I cant say its anywhere near canon compliant, but ive definitely learnt to love my memey portrayal of them, as I hope yall have !! theyre definitely different than they were in chapter one, but I kinda love it lmao. I literally started this fic like, 6 days after I binged watched voltron in a day, so, I was pretty anxious about writing them all at the start lol. but here we are now, theyre all memes too.

and now onto some even more sappy stuff: I genuinely love yall so goddamn much. I hope you guys know how much I Love talking to you!! like I try to answer every comment and I think I can confidently say I answer 99.9% of them? but other than that the discord was the Greatest idea of my entire life (which you can still join !! hmu in the comments and ill give you the link !! seriously, don't be afraid, we don't bite!! (we just vore ;;)) ))

anyway yes while I already considered you all my pals, getting to know yall has been so fun. we talk p much everyday lol and I adore it !! we've become such a big family, and it feels like ive known yall for years because we all just get along so well !! and as well as me making friends with all of you, its also meant yall have been able to make friends with each other and aaaaa that just makes me so so happy:')) the space (& vore) fam mean the world to me and I would do everything to just meet all of you and hug you so tightly. you make me so happy !!! we've only been talking for a few weeks but damn I feel like we're all such close friends im just :'))

anyway im gonna Shut Up but yes !!! thank you all so muuuuch for a year of letting me be meme trash, whether you've been here from the start or have just read the fic: I love you !!! if it wasn't for you guys, this fic would've ended a loong time ago.

TL;DR: im a sap and I love you all so much

the only things I have left to say are: you're welcome, furries

and here's to another year?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes I LOVE YALL SO VERY MUCH :')) 
> 
> a year !! thats so wild omg:')) 
> 
> bless yall for putting up with my mess, and i hope u stick around !! <333
> 
> (P.S !!! I found what i originally wrote for the shalluratt date and lemme tell u its 10x better than what i uploaded, so i changed it !! ya can go back n reread it if u want some Pure shalluratt moments lol (its the same idea of the date, just written a lot better))


	53. whomst

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more friends,, yall kno it had to happen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> h-hewwo???
> 
> THATS RIGHT YALL, IM BACK!! 
> 
> this fic would never be abandoned just so yall Know and i have had a very good reason for keeping this from u,,, and u shall see,,,, 
> 
> ALSO the discord for this fic is still alive and going strong!! if any of yall wanna join here's the link: https://discord.gg/PjVw79C
> 
> anyway enjOY

  _space dad:_ I want to die.

 

_sharkboy:_ Mood.

_lancey lance:_ big mood

_space daddy:_ whats up this time

_space dad:_ I've been added to a chat with the other versions of me, and Slav.

_pidgeon:_ our slav or alternate slav

_space dad:_ _Both_.

_pidgeon:_ lmao

_hunk of love:_ rip

_princess pop culture:_ Why don't you just leave?

_sharkboy:_ I mean we are going to be getting rid of two of them soon.

_space dad:_ I think leaving would break Sven's heart. I'll just mute it.

_lancey lance:_ cant believe shiro has found a new squad,, they grow up so fast

_pidgeon:_ speaking of squads

_pidgeon:_ someone else has a squad now too

_sharkboy:_ If you're about to add them to the chat, here's a cool idea: don't.

_[pidgeon added Acxa, Ezor, Narti and Zethrid to the chat]_

_pidgeon:_ too late

_princess pop culture:_ Pidge, will you ever stop adding our Galra enemies to the chat?

_pidgeon:_ probably not

_Acxa:_ What... Is this?

_pidgeon:_ voltron group chat, welcome aboard

_Ezor:_ sounds fun!!

_Zethrid:_ now we can plan our fights with them, I dibs fighting the pink one

_pidgeon:_ first of all rude

_pidgeon:_ second of all ezor gets it, this is for fun not fighting

_sharkboy:_ They're literally our enemies. Fighting is inevitable.

_Acxa:_ Okay wait.. Someone give me a run down. Who's who?

_sharkoy:_ Pidge, don't.

_pidgeon:_ no need to be so hostile keith

_pidgeon:_ sharkboy - keef, red but technically black paladin

_pidgeon:_ lancey lance - lance, blue but technically red paladin

_pidgeon:_ princess pop culture: allura, blue (technically pink?) paladin/princess

_pidgeon:_ space dad: you don't really know him but shiro, former black paladin

_pidgeon:_ hunk of love: hunk, yellow paladin

_pidgeon:_ cool uncle: don't know him and never on but coran  
_pidgeon:_ space daddy: another one you don't know, matt, my bro

_pidgeon:_ and me, pidge, green paladin.

_Acxa:_ Thank you..

_Ezor:_ so when do we get to see the kitties!!!

_lancey lance:_ the lions aren't in the chat its sad

_Ezor:_ aww :(

_space dad:_ I leave for two minutes. Who are these people?

_hunk of love:_ Lotor's generals.

_Zethrid:_ Aka the best in the universe

_lancey lance:_ um excuse me that's our title

_Ezor:_ I thought your title was _defenders_ of the universe?

_lancey lance:_ good point

_Acxa:_ Why did you add us, but not Lotor?

_sharkboy:_ We added Lotor before. Then made fun of him.

_Acxa:_ You did _what_

_Zethrid:_ ooooo do I sense a fight brewing

_lancey lance:_ i typoed his name so we just kept calling him the wrong thing

_lancey lance:_ pretty funny, actually

_Ezor:_ like.. what?

_lancey lance:_ prince lotion, prince loser, prince lotad, you get the gist

_Ezor:_... it is kinda funny

_Acxa:_ Ezor!

_Ezor:_ what! you gotta admit it, acxa

_Ezor:_... loiter isn't here to see it anyway  
_Ezor:_ (did I do it right??)

_Acxa:_ Wrong. I've been stood with Acxa this whole time. - _Lotor_.

_Ezor:_ id like to start off my three part apology by saying you're a wonderful leader

_Acxa:_ Save it. -Lotor.

_Ezor:_ okay good because that's all ive got

_pidgeon:_ im not gonna lie... you guys are pretty cool

_hunk of love:_ pidge don't flirt with the enemy

_pidgeon:_ who said anything about flirting !!!!

_lancey lance:_ off topic but why do allura, shiro and even keith go offline when we do this

_sharkboy:_ Because we have sense, and don't want to talk to our enemies.

_Acxa:_ Enemy wasn't always what you saw me as now was it, Keith?

_sharkboy:_ I don't know what you're talking about. Goodbye.

_space daddy:_ ive been lurking but, whaaaaaat development is this im seeing

_space daddy:_ keith and acxa know each other?

_sharkboy:_ No.

_Acxa:_ Yes.

_pidgeon:_ im jealous

_lancey lance:_ what

_space dad:_ What?

_princess pop culture:_ What???

_hunk of love:_ what- oh wait

_hunk of love:_ ooh yeah I remember, yep, keith knows acxa

_sharkboy:_ HUNK! How could you betray me like this?

_hunk of love:_ sorry buddy

_princess pop culture:_ Keith. Explain.

_sharkboy:_ Fine..

_sharkboy:_ When Hunk and I were in the Weblum, I found someone stuck in there. I didn't see their face, or anything, so I helped them get free.

_sharkboy:_ I then realised they were Galra, but we didn't have time to fight because we were being attacked. They actually helped us out the whole time.

_sharkboy:_ They did take some of the scaltrite, but they didn't hurt us.

_sharkboy:_ Then, we we fought the generals, I recognised Acxa as the one from the Weblum. So, technically, I do know her.

_princess pop culture:_ Why didn't you tell us _then_!? We could've done something!

_sharkboy:_ I don't know, maybe because you hated my guts then and probably would've used it against me?

_princess pop culture:_ ... Good point. You are forgiven.

_Ezor:_ Ooh I remember that! You said you recognised him though, right Acxa?

_Acxa:_ Ezor. Shut up.

_sharkboy:_ What?

_Acxa:_ Nothing.

_sharkboy:_ No, no, you don't get to drop me in it then not explain yourself.

_Acxa:_ Fine, you just.. Reminded me of someone. I must have been wrong.

_sharkboy:_ Right..

_pidgeon:_ anyway

_pidgeon:_ where'd zethrid go I like her

_Ezor:_ she's playing with kova!!

_pidgeon:_ kova?

_Ezor:_ Narti's kitty!!

_pidgeon:_ that raises another question, why hasn't narti spoke yet?

_Ezor:_ oh, she doesn't talk much.

_pidgeon:_ fair enough

_lancey lance:_ I think ezor is my fave

_Ezor:_ that's sweet:'))

_space daddy:_ probs bc shes most like u smh

_lancey lance:_ I don't know what you mean

_space daddy:_ and tbh, acxa is really similar to keith

_Acxa:_ Not true.

_sharkboy:_ I wouldn't say so.

_hunk of love:_ hold on, matts onto something here

_pidgeon:_ yeah!! you two even look kinda similar

_Acxa: Not. True._

_Ezor:_ no need to be so defensive acxa, I think keiths quite handsome!!

_pidgeon:_ (god I wish that were me)

_Zethrid:_ So if they look the same, you think Acxa is too?

_Ezor:_ of course!! acxa is beautiful

_pidgeon:_ ( _god I wish that were me_ )

_lancey lance:_ hey, hey, back off my boyfriend

_Ezor:_ no worries, I don't think lotor would be happy if I dated a paladin

_Acxa:_ Correct. -Lotor.

_space dad:_ I don't like that Lotor is reading all of this...

_Acxa:_ What are you going to do about it? -Lotor.

_space dad:_ I mean, we could kick you all out.

_Ezor:_ nooooo im having fun!! lotor stop reading!!!

_Acxa:_ You can't tell me what to do. But I do have a plan I need to work on. Ciao for now. -Lotor.

_space daddy:_ I don't know these guys but they sure aren't acting like enemies

_Ezor:_ we're ~different~

_space daddy:_ no kidding

_princess pop culture:_ Matt's right, though. When Pidge added Zarkon, and even Lotor, they were very hostile towards us.

_lancey lance:_ and zarkon tried to promote the empire

_princess pop culture:_ That too. But you guys.. You're acting normally.

_Acxa:_ Just testing the waters. Don't expect us to act anything like this when we meet again in person.

_lancey lance:_ sad,, me and ezor could be good friends,,

_sharkboy:_ So Pidge is flirting with the enemy, and Lance is trying to befriend them. Great.

_pidgeon:_ um who was the one that saved acxa??? you?????? thought so

_sharkboy:_ That was different.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAA!!!!!! ART!!!!!!! BEAUTIFUL, AMAZING ART!!!!!!
> 
> my lovely amazing friend ringa drew this for me for this chapter!!! it was so hard not to scream this from the rooftops but i wanted it to be a surprise!! but yes its so amazing and i cried :')) ive never felt so Blesst
> 
> ringas deviantart: https://flajdesz.deviantart.com/  
> ringas tumblr: http://meszeni.tumblr.com/
> 
> yall should check her out she is Talented !!!
> 
> (but also fyi i do have some other chapters written And a season 4 chapter so ,, updates r coming yalls way)
> 
> anyway!! as usual,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3


	54. owo whats this?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i think its to hide that youre secretly a furry,

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> henlo friendos 
> 
> i,,,,, honestly,,,, this whole chapter,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
> 
> have fun

_lancey lance:_ hey guys

_lancey lance:_ what would your fursonas be

_lancey lance:_ keith don't answer u already have one its ur galra form

_sharkboy:_ How many _times_ , Lance. It's not a fursona.

_pidgeon:_ lance... what

_hunk of love:_ a bear.

_lancey lance:_ thank you, hunk.

_lancey lance:_ its called BONDING smh

_lancey lance:_ the quickest way to know someones personality is by knowing their fursona: fact.

_lancey lance:_ keiths is a galra: angery, but really a giant space cat

_sharkboy:_ Not a fursona.

_lancey lance:_ hunks is a bear: ud think grizzly, but actually hes a teddy bear: soft and sweet and gives good hugs

_lancey lance:_ so ill ask again: what would your fursonas be

_space daddy:_ hmm..

_pidgeon:_ matt... don't answer him

_space daddy:_ pidge if im gonna be a part of this team we've gotta bond

_space dad:_ This isn't exactly the type of bonding we usually do.

_lancey lance:_ shiro! what about you?

_space dad:_ I don't want to know what a fursona is.

_space daddy:_ oh sure you do

_space daddy:_ its an anthropomorphic animal that you would choose as your persona.. but since its an animal....  _fur_ sona.

_space dad:_ Oh. Why is this a thing?

_pidgeon:_ me too shiro

_lancey lance:_ its a big thing on earth shiro like,,, theres furry cons n everything

_lancey lance:_ can also be a fetish but lets not get into That

_space dad:_ So why are you asking?

_lancey lance:_ I already said: to know more about your personalities.

_space dad:_ Well.. Alright, I guess.

_pidgeon:_ shiro please no

_space dad:_ Probably a wolf.

_pidgeon:_ shiRO NOOO

_space daddy:_ I think i'd go with fox?

_pidgeon:_ maTT NO HOW COULD YOU, MY OWN BROTHER, BETRAY ME LIKE THIS

_lancey lance:_ hm good to know.

_space daddy:_ what would yours be lance

_lancey lance:_ honestly,, idk

_lancey lance:_ but its fine im not the furry in this relationship, keith is

_sharkboy:_ Lance, for the _last time_. Galra does not equal furry.

_lancey lance:_ oh but it does, my sweet furry boyfriend

_space daddy:_ wait wait wait...

_lancey lance:_ what

_space daddy:_ im on team keiths galra side isn't his fursona

_lancey lance:_ matt how could you

_space daddy:_ but

_pidgeon:_.... but?

_space daddy:_ lance is the one dating keith. dating... a galra.... who look... suspiciously... like purple humans with cat ears...

_pidgeon:_ oh my god I see where ur going with this

_space daddy:_ lance... is the furry

_hunk of love:_ lance: exposed

_lancey lance:_ I.... no

_sharkboy:_ Ha.

_lancey lance:_ keith no... don't let them slander me like this..

_sharkboy:_ I don't know, Lance, Matt makes a pretty convincing point.

_space dad:_ I still don't completely understand it but Lance, if you're a furry, we support you.

_pidgeon:_ speak for yourself shiro

_pidgeon:_ bc I dont

_lancey lance:_ okay first of all, rude

_hunk of love:_ lance, buddy, youre not denying it

_lancey lance:_ OKAY FIRST OF ALL, RUDE

_space daddy:_ oh my god... lance is a furry

_sharkboy:_ Lance, we're breaking up.

_lancey lance:_ **OKAY FIRST OF ALL, RUDE**

_princess pop culture:_ What.. Is going on?

_sharkboy:_ Lance is a furry. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i hope some of yall get the quote i used for the summary lol else ill just look Odd
> 
> but yeah lance is a furry no doubt
> 
> alSO !!!! literally 50 hits away from 20k!!!!!!! what !!!!!!! yall !!!!!!!!! thank u sm im dying !!!!!
> 
> anyway as usual!
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	55. bc ur worth it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a very, very belated s4 chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do i even need to give spoiler warnings at this point its been over a month sine s4 came out
> 
> but anyway as per usual, my season chapters never really fit in with whatever vague ish timeline i have going but yall know the drill by now, this is just a mess
> 
> enjoy!

 

_lancey lance:_ keeeeeeeeith

_lancey lance:_ I miss yoooooooooou

_space daddy:_ you're probably just jealous that hes hanging out with the furries

_lancey lance:_ matt,

_sharkboy:_ I'll be coming back to the castle soon, Lance.

_lancey lance:_ u better be

_lancey lance:_ anyway we need to TALK

_lancey lance:_ I know ur a full time blade now and self sacrifice is their fave thing

_lancey lance:_ but DONT EVER DO THAT AGAIN

_lancey lance:_ NO SACRIFICE FOR YOU.

_sharkboy:_ Yeah, yeah.

_sharkboy:_ At least I didn't die.

_pidgeon:_ yeah bc lotor saved u lol

_princess pop culture:_ It's still... Strange to believe that Lotor helped us.

_space daddy:_ well he is an enemy of the Galra now lmao

_space daddy:_ makes sense

_hunk of love:_ are we really teaming up with him

_space dad:_ I mean.. He did save Keith. And all of us, for that matter.

_space dad:_ If he continues to prove that we can trust him... He could be a useful ally.

_pidgeon:_ hey yall know what this means

_[pidgeon added prince loser to the chat]_

_pidgeon:_ welcome back, prince lotion

_prince loser:_ Still with the nicknames?

_pidgeon:_ hey, theyre friendly nicknames now

_[prince loser removed Narti from the group]_

 _[Acxa removed Ezor and Zethrid from the group]_

 _Acxa:_ For Narti.

 _[Axca left the group]_

 _hunk of love:_ honestly I forgot they were still in here

_space daddy:_ same

_pidgeon:_ awww what happened:((

_prince loser:_ Uh.. Long story.

_princess pop culture:_ Not to sound.. Hostile, but is it really wise for Lotor to be in here so early on?

_prince loser:_ You'll change your mind soon enough, Allura.

_princess pop cutlure:_ We'll see about that.

_space daddy:_ watch it, prince litterbox

_space dad:_ I'm with Matt. Watch it.

_hunk of love:_ okay guys chill out

_prince loser:_ Yes. Anyway, you're all welcome.

_prince loser:_ Especially you, Keith.

_sharkboy:_ I would've saved them myself.

_prince loser:_ Yeah, while dying.

_prince loser:_ I saved your life.

_sharkboy:_ I'm not going to thank you, if that's what you want.

_prince loser:_ Suddenly I can't read, I don't know.

_lancey lance:_ oh my god.. lotor just... memed

_lancey lance:_ WELCOME TO THE TEAM, BUDDY

_pidgeon:_ lances only requirements for being in team voltron: meme

_lancey lance:_ and im not ashamed of that

_prince loser:_ I don't know what you mean, and I don't want to know.

_hunk of love:_ well, you're in our gc, you're going to know what memeing is soon enough

_space dad:_ Must we have him in the group chat.

_pidgeon:_ yes

_lancey lance:_ yes

_space daddy:_ I can support it

_hunk of love:_ i mean... we've done it before

_sharkboy:_ No.

_space dad:_ Once again, Keith is the only person in the team I can stand.

_space daddy:_ okay first of all,

_space daddy:_ Allura and i say hi

_space dad:_ Allura, I can stand too.

_space daddy:_ okay, first of all,

_space dad:_ Matt. You just agreed to have our enemy in the chat.

_pidgeon:_ okay not to interrupt your domestic or anything

_pidgeon:_ but your names are too confusingly similar

_space dad:_ Okay?

_pidgeon:_ and shiro, that's been your name from the start. time for a change.

_[pidgeon changed space dad's name to worlds okayest dad]_

_worlds okayest dad:_ Well... it's kind of mean.

_hunk of love:_ omg

_lancey lance:_ its.. the end of an era

_lancey lance:_ rip space dad

_lancey lance:_ forever in our hearts

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> woop lotor is back !! 
> 
> also i realised shiros name has been the same thing since chapter ONE yall. he survived 54 chapters with the exact same name. he deserved a change. maybe a nicer one tho. 
> 
> anywayyyy as usual
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!! <3


	56. atb day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof  
> here i am  
> ,,, thats all i have to say

_pidgeon:_ wow its been real quiet in here lately

_lancey lance:_ youre telling me

_worlds okayest dad:_ Again, I'm still not 100% on board with having Lotor in here. I don't want to talk so much.

_prince loser:_ Are you ever going to drop your hostility? We're never going to be a functioning team if you don't.

_pidgeon:_ he has a point

_worlds okayest dad:_ A: You're not _actually_ a part of the team, yet.

_worlds okayest dad:_ B: Forgive me for not having the best history with Galra. I'm going to be hostile.

_lancey lance:_ uhhhhhh

_lancey lance:_ keith

_worlds okayest dad:_ Obviously Keith doesn't count in that.

_prince loser:_ Well, he is Galra.

_worlds okayest dad:_ Half. And, he's my brother. I've known him my entire life.

_prince lotor:_ I'm half Galra.

_worlds okayest dad:_ Since you all can't hear me right now, I'm sighing.

_worlds okayest dad:_ Let me rephrase. I haven't had the best history with Zarkon, and anyone related to him. So, I'm going to be hostile.

_hunk of love:_ I think hes got you all there

_worlds okayest dad:_ Thank you, Hunk.

_hunk of love:_ its okay, you deserve a break

_worlds okayest dad:_ tell me about it

_hunk of love:_ #letspacedadrest

_sharkboy:_ That's not his nickname anymore.

_hunk of love:_ but its still him

_lancey lance:_ he'll always be our space dad

_worlds okayest dad:_ I'm literally like 6 years older than you all.

_space daddy:_ *6 years old

_pidgeon:_ lmao good one matt

_space daddy:_ ;;))

_worlds okayest dad:_ My own boyfriend... How could you betray me...

_space daddy:_ im not betraying u im spreading Truth

_lancey lance:_ cant argue with that shiro you have only had 6 birthdays so you're 6 that's fact

_pidgeon:_ cant argue with sciencE

_worlds okayest dad:_ How.... is that science

_pidgeon:_ cant question sciencE

_worlds okayest dad:_ .....

_sharkboy:_ Why are you all teaming up against Shiro?

_space daddy:_ how could u assume such an awful thing, keith

_space daddy:_ we would never...

_pidgeon:_ why would I ever hurt shiro, our fearsome leader and space dad

_lancey lance:_ I cant believe youd accuse me of such a thing, keith...

_lancey lance:_ im hurt...

_hunk of love:_ well now im confused

_lancey lance:_ don't you know what day it is?

_hunk of love:_ uh if I had to guess, Tuesday?

_lancey lance:_ no..

_lancey lance:_ its attack the broganes day

_sharkboy:_ Well, that isn't a real day.

_pidgeon:_ how could you insult a holiday of our religion, keith

_space daddy:_ jeez

_lancey lance:_ that's harsh, babe

_sharkboy:_ I give up.

_worlds okayest dad:_ I gave up years ago.

_pidgeon:_ losing hope at such a young age.... sad

_space daddy:_ it gets the young ones the hardest, you know

_lancey lance:_ we should start a charity for poor, young souls who are giving up hope

_[worlds okayest dad has left the group chat]_

_hunk of love:_ one down, one to go

_lancey lance:_ that's the atb day spirit hunk!

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> will they ever let keef and shiro live? probably not
> 
> (pidges 'its been real quiet in here lately' was me calling myself out for not uploading in so long)
> 
> big oof depressive writers block has hit me hard reccently lmao so was this the best chapter ever? no   
> am i still uploading it? yeah why not 
> 
> hope u liked it nonetheless and as usual,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	57. egg

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey its everyones least favourite mess finally back after almost another month of no update
> 
> sdkfjdskjf im a Mess, 
> 
> enjoy this bad chapter

_lancey lance:_ okay so.

_pidgeon:_ im already afraid

_lancey lance:_ good

_lancey lance:_ and im gonna need all the opinions I can get here so

_[lance added worlds okayest dad to the chat]_

_worlds okayest dad:_ No.

_lancey lance:_ yes

_lancey lance:_ anyway

_lancey lance:_ okay

_lancey lance:_ galra.

_hunk of love:_ what about them?

_lancey lance:_ how were they born?

_prince loser:_ Why are you asking this?

_lancey lance:_ I have my reasons lotoreal

_lancey lance:_ can you answer my question

_prince loser:_ Why should I?

_lancey lance:_ uhh bc ur a part of the team now

_prince loser:_.. Fine.

_prince loser:_ Galra are hatched from eggs.

_pidgeon:_ SKDJKLJF NO WAY

_lancey lance:_ REALLY

_lancey lance:_ lotor don't toy with me here

_prince loser:_ I'm not.

_hunk of love:_ oh my god..

_hunk of love:_ so does that mean..

_lancey lance:_ THATS EXACTLY WHERE IM GOING WITH THIS HUNK

_lancey lance:_ KEITH WAS HATCHED

_worlds okayest dad:_ I'm going to leave again.

_lancey lance:_ no no no shiro I need your confirmation

_lancey lance:_ was keith hatched

_[worlds okayest dad left the chat]_

_lancey lance:_ that... CONFIRMS IT

_lancey lance:_ KEITH GET IN HERE

_pidgeon:_ COME ON OUT EGG BOY

_hunk of love:_ egg boY

_pidgeon:_ yes egg boy

_sharkboy:_ What.. Is going on?

_lancey lance:_ we know your secret, egg boy

_[pidgeon changed sharkboys nickname to egg boy]_

_egg boy:_ I'm confused.

_hunk of love:_ scroll up

_egg boy:_ Okay?

_egg boy:_... Lotor.

_egg boy:_ You traitor.

_prince loser:_ What?

_prince loser:_ I'm simply making sure I'm bonding with the team.

_egg boy:_ Well, they didn't need to know _that_.

_lancey lance:_ I cant believe my boyfriend is a chicken

_egg boy:_ I'm not a chicken, Lance.

_pidgeon:_ I thought he was a cat

_lancey lance:_ I cant believe my boyfriend is a chicken cat

_pidgeon:_ better

_space daddy:_ okay im with the rebels for two minutes

_space daddy:_ and suddenly keiths a chicken cat??

_space daddy:_ explain

_hunk of love:_ Lotor told us that galra are hatched

_space daddy:_ oh

_space daddy:_ okay then yeah keiths a chicken cat

_prince loser:_ What's a chicken?

_lancey lance:_ an animal on earth that hatches out of an egg

_egg boy:_ There are plenty of mammals who are hatched from eggs. This isn't a big deal.

_lancey lance:_ uh yes it is

_lancey lance:_ you were HATCHED

_lancey lance:_ OUT OF AN _EGG_

_egg boy:_ Allura, is it too late to kick Lotor off of the team?

_princess pop culture:_ I'm wondering the same thing myself...

_prince loser:_ Okay, rude.

_lancey lance:_ yeah youll get that a lot here

_pidgeon:_ keith allura and shiro think theyre above us because theyre 'mature'

_hunk of love:_ we all know keith is just as bad as lance

_hunk of love:_ he just wont admit it

_egg boy:_ Untrue.

_prince loser:_ How did I end up with you guys and not the mature ones, then?

_pidgeon:_ because deep down... lotor... you are... a meme

_hunk of love:_ youll embrace it soon enough

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> keith was hatched and ill fight anyone on it
> 
> sdfkjsj okay ngl i dont get ideas for this as often now but when i do, i can tell you that the discord definitely inspires them lmao
> 
> i have nothing else to say 
> 
> so
> 
> as usual,  
> comments and kudos would make me v haps <3


	58. the beginning...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> whats up fuckers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> does anyone remember this bc im sure yall dont
> 
> but anyway here i am
> 
> continuing my streak of every new chapter becoming the worst yet
> 
> enjoy!

_ lancey lance:  _ okay but

_ lancey lance:  _ why does shiro keep leaving us :((

_ lancey lance:  _ how will we go on without our father

_ pidgeon:  _ idk but its already having a toll on hunk he’s crying in the corner

_ lancey lance:  _ yeah but when isnt he

_ pidgeon:  _ okay true

_ lancey lance:  _ its a mood tho

_ pidgeon:  _ that it is

_ space daddy:  _ wait what

_ space daddy:  _ shiro left again?

_ egg boy: _ Yeah. Do you pay any attention to the chat or..?

_ space daddy:  _ you wound me keith

_ princess pop culture:  _ Shouldn’t you add Shiro back?

_ space daddy:  _ hes left twice he hates us

_ princess pop culture:  _ Oh.

_ space daddy:  _ im joking allura omg dw

_ lancey lance:  _ imagine a relationship so fragile

_ lancey lance:  _ glad i cant relate right keith

_ lancey lance:  _ keith?

_ lancey lance:  _ …. Keith.

_ pidgeon:  _ lmao rip

_ prince loser:  _ Wait, wait, hold on. How many relationships is there on this team?

_ hunk of love:  _ i heard relationships im back

_ hunk of love:  _ there is: 

_ hunk of love:  _ keith and lance, aka klance, and shiro, allura and matt aka…. Shalluratt

_ pidgeon:  _ thats a bad name

_ hunk of love:  _ i just came up with it!! Let me live damn

_ prince loser:  _ Three people in a relationship?

_ hunk of love:  _ really? Alteans nor galra know about polyamory? I pity you all

_ prince loser:  _ Poly… What now?

_ hunk of love:  _ ill explain later

_ lancey lance:  _ you forgot the best relationship hunk

_ lancey lance:  _ shlav

_ hunk of love:  _ .. shlav?

_ lancey lance:  _ shiro and slav, duh. Theyre married in like 50 relaties

_ hunk of love:  _ oh yeah!!

_ pidgeon:  _ this gives me an idea

_ space daddy:  _ omg is slav coming back

_ pidgeon:  _ yes he is, brother o mine

_ pidgeon:  _ maybe that will make shiro stay here

_ [pidgeon added slav and worlds okayest dad to the chat] _

_ worlds okayest dad:  _ You all are the reason I’m stressed.

_ pidgeon:  _ love you too shiro

_ lancey lance:  _ SLAV MY BUDDY MY PAL

_ slav: _ i always knew there was a 54% chance id come back here

_ hunk of love:  _ he never gave up hope…. Thats so cute

_ prince loser:  _ Wait.. Slav? As in, the one who was in Beta Traz?

_ slav:  _ what…. Is going on

_ slav:  _ why is lotor here

_ slav:  _ i didnt calculate for this

_ slav:  _ i dont like this

_ lancey lance:  _ hey hey calm down

_ lancey lance:  _ i have a simple solution

_ [lancey lancey removed prince loser from the chat] _

_ princess pop culture:  _ Weren’t you on board with having Lotor in the chat?

_ princess pop culture: _ Not that I’m not happy he’s gone, of course.

_ lancey lance:  _ yeah but i prefer slav

_ lancey lace:  _ and im sure shiro does too ;;))

_ worlds okayest dad:  _ Seriously. I hate all of you.

_ lancey lance:  _ except for slav ;;)))))))

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes.... i couldnt keep him away
> 
> slav makes his return
> 
> i have some things PLANNED so get ready for the best and worst things that will ever happen to this fic
> 
> as usual,
> 
> comments and kudos would make me v haps!<3


	59. .. of the end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oof here we go
> 
> so yall - this is the second to last chapter, ill explain more When the last chapter goes up but im mad at myself bc i wanted the last chapter up today lmao, but at least ur getting something
> 
>  
> 
> enjoy!

_ [prince loser started a chat with egg boy] _

_ prince loser: _ Keith. Add me back.

_ egg boy: _ No.

_ prince loser:  _ And why not?

_ egg boy:  _ I don’t like you.

_ prince loser:  _ I’m sure we can work past that. 

_ prince loser:  _ I saved your life, after all.

_ egg boy:  _ Oh my god, you can’t keep holding that against me. I never asked you to save me.

_ prince loser:  _ What, you’d rather have killed yourself?

_ egg boy:  _ Yes.

_ prince loser:  _ Uh…

_ prince loser:  _ So, moving on.

_ prince loser: _ Add me back.

_ egg boy:  _ No.

_ prince loser:  _ Keith, please.

_ egg boy:  _ Why are you asking me?? Why not Lance? Or Pidge? Or Hunk? You seem to be buddy buddy with them.

_ prince loser:  _ Ohhh. Are you jealous that I’m close to your boyfriend?

_ egg boy: _ No. Lance and I are very happy together.

_ prince loser:  _ I’m sure.. But anyway, this is  _ about _ relationships, so I need your help.

_ egg boy: _ Again, why are you asking me?

_ prince loser:  _ You’re in a relationship.

_ egg boy: _ If I humour you, will you leave me alone?

_ prince loser:  _ I suppose so. 

_ egg boy:  _ Fine. What do you want?

_ prince loser:  _ Slav.

_ egg boy: _ I’m sorry what

_ prince loser:  _ I’ve wanted Slav for many years. My father strongly disapproved, which is one of the reasons why he locked him in such a high security prison.

_ egg boy:  _ Why are you telling me this?

_ prince loser:  _ I thought we were close.

_ egg boy:  _ did… did you not see me say I don’t like you earlier?

_ prince loser:  _ Lance told me that would be what you call ‘banter’.

_ egg boy:  _ Right. Lance. 

_ egg boy:  _ Anyway. Are you saying you want to  _ date  _ Slav?

_ prince loser:  _ Date?

_ egg boy:  _ Be in a relationship with him.

_ prince loser:  _ Then yes, I want to date Slav.

_ egg boy:  _ …. Okay. 

_ egg boy: _ Good luck with that?

_ prince loser:  _ Are you not going to help me?

_ egg boy: _ I could barely help myself to get a relationship with Lance. I’m not the wingman type. 

_ prince loser:  _ Can you at least add me back to the chat?

_ egg boy:  _ … Fine.

 

_ [Meme Dream Team] _

_ [egg boy added prince loser to the chat] _

_ lancey lance:  _ KEITH 

_ lancey lance:  _ TRAITOR

_ egg boy:  _ Lotor was dming me. It was getting annoying.

_ prince loser:  _ Ouch.

_ slav:  _ i still… dont like this

_ prince loser:  _ Slav, we may have gotten off on the wrong foot.

_ slav:  _ wrong foot??? Your father locked me in a HIGH SECURITY PRISON and TORTURED me

_ prince loser:  _ Yes… My father, not me.

_ prince loser:  _ But, I am sorry about that. Perhaps we can move on?

_ slav:  _ …. I dont like the idea but

_ slav:  _ in most realities it seems to be the likely outcome

_ prince loser:  _ Good. Very good.

_ slav:  _ why is he so creepy

_ lancey lance:  _ we ask that all the time

_ hunk of love:  _ okay but guys… shiro hasnt left yet

_ hunk of love:  _ was bringing slav back really the answer?

_ pidgeon:  _ they dont call me a genuis for nothing

_ egg boy:  _ who. Whom calls you a genuis?

_ pidgeon:  _ … everyone

_ space daddy:  _ pidge is a genius do you wanna fight me keith

_ egg boy:  _ Yes

_ space daddy:  _ alright meet me on the training deck

_ egg boy:  _ Be there in 5.

_ lancey lance:  _ oof rip matt

_ worlds okayest dad:  _ Sigh.

_ worlds okayest dad:  _ That’s because none of you are near me to hear/see it.

_ hunk of love:  _ yeah yeah we know

_ slav:  _ shiro!!!!

_ worlds okayest dad:  _ no!!!!!

_ slav:  _ aw come on

_ slav:  _ we’re good friends!!

_ worlds okayest dad:  _ Good friends??

_ slav:  _ yeah!! We always have been!

_ worlds okayest dad: _ Uh. Okay.

_ space daddy:  _ aww :’))

_ space daddy:  _ they grow up so fast

_ pidgeon:  _ are you back from ur fight for my honour

_ space daddy:  _ yes

_ pidgeon:  _ how did it go

_ space daddy:  _ …. I dont wanna talk about it

_ egg boy:  _ I gave you the option to back down.

_ space daddy:  _ I DIDN’T THINK YOU’D PULL OUT YOUR BLADE

_ egg boy:  _ There was no rules on weapons. 

_ space daddy:  _ anyway…. I see slav and lotor made up

_ prince loser:  _ Yes!

_ slav: _ .. Yeah. It’s the likely outcome, and plus, he seems to be a good leader for this group.

_ worlds okayest dad: _ That’s?? My role??

_ slav:  _ ah, but you see shiro, theres actually an 86% chance lotor will become the black paladin

_ worlds okayest dad:  _ I think not.

_ slav:  _ he is a very good leader.

_ slav:  _ I was blinded by my hatred but now i see it

_ slav:  _ hes very skilled as a leader and will make a great asset to this team

_ worlds okayest dad:  _ Why do literally all of you hate me

_ slav:  _ i dont hate you, shiro

_ slav:  _ but realities dont lie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> djsfksjfksdj
> 
> i wonder if anyone can guess whats gonna be endgame and how this is gonna finish
> 
> im not gonna confirm or deny anything, but i can tell u its gonna be WILD 
> 
> as usual, 
> 
> comments and kudos would make be v haps <3


End file.
